Today, my roommate thought it would be a good idea to show me his huge new tarantula despite knowing that I have extremely severe arachnophobia. I ended up killing it with a book and apparently now owe him $500. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the goddamned holy shit out of it. Trying to impress my cute new roommate, I scooped up the remains and showed him. It was his pet tarantula. FML
Today, my girlfriend bought me a pet tarantula. I now have one of my biggest fears crawling around my house. FML
Today, knowing that I have severe arachnophobia, my brother brought over his friend's tarantula. One hour later, the spider got loose. It's been 5 hours and I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML
Today, I spotted a huge spider in my bedroom. I freaked out at first, but I managed to confront my arachnophobia and killed it with a book. I was ecstatic and went to tell my boyfriend. By the time I returned to my room, the "dead" spider had vanished. Now I'm too scared to sleep. FML
Today, my boss captured a huge spider and put it in a jar on the desk in our shop. He's named it Fluffy and is threatening to fire me if I harm it. I'm horribly arachnophobic and we share that desk. FML
Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML
Today, I went to see a therapist for help with my severe fear of spiders. The therapist held a big spider in a box inches away from my face. I ran to the back of the room and asked him why. He responded with, "Aren't therapists supposed to help you face your fears?" I'm paying $150 an hour. FML
Today, as part of our prank war, my girlfriend found a hairy tarantula picture and stuck it on the wall. I hadn't yet told her I'm arachnophobic, and when I saw it I passed out and hit my head hard enough to need an ambulance. She decided she's won the war and I don't get a say in the matter. FML
Today, I finally gave in and agreed to try holding my girlfriend's pet tarantula. The moment I did, it bit me. According to her she’s had him 4 years and he’s never so much as nipped her, never mind a full bite. Lucky me. My hand is twice the normal size and I can feel my heartbeat in it. FML
Today, my girlfriend, KNOWING I have severe arachnophobia, changed the wallpapers on my phone and tablet to pictures of tarantulas, all because she's mad at me. And she won't change it back. FML
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Top comments
KomiExplosion 0
This is why we can't have nice things.
whatfml 0
you sound an annoying, drama feeding, self loving teen. just saying "omg I would totally stand on it with like my platforms"
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Comments (336)
Cjeezy 0
I hope someone is afraid of you and in some form of way kills you..
safwat 0
you don't owe him shit. this was a self defense reaction and op your jackass friend knew
b6000 0
I wouldn't pay him nothing.
namhowell 6
This is a funny one, kinda dumb but funny. I did lol.
kellie20 0
he kinda deserves that!
xJordieeBearhhx 0
dude you don't owe him shit, he knew you were afraid of spiders, and he pulled a cruel joke. dont give Him shit.
sloppyflow 1
Eff.You.See.Kay
pip74205 9
You should charge him $1,000 for the mental trauma of him intentionally placing a phobia in front of you.
chevonfinley 8
you DON'T kill other people's pets, you ******* asshole. no matter how much "you don't like" what kind it is. how could you do something like that? that makes me sick. it wasn't just a spider, it was his PET. that's like you killing someones puppy bc you're terrified of dogs. what the **** is wrong with you? grow up.
Iknoweverything 29
Under the same token, you also don't bring pets in to a house you share without discussing it with your roommate. Yeah, OP should have told him to either get rid of it, or move the **** out, but when you LIVE with someone, and you know they have a deathly fear, you kind of have it coming if they react in less than favorable ways. If you want a pet that your roommate doesn't like, you should consider moving with someone who actually likes said type of pet.
purple_sarah88 0
Yes they should have asked but there is a difference between being inconsiderate of your roommate's feelings and actually killing your roomate's pet!
annahershey 0
OMG, YOU ARE A HORRIFIC PERSON!!! F your roommate's life for having such a terrible roommate.