Today, as part of our prank war, my girlfriend found a hairy tarantula picture and stuck it on the wall. I hadn't yet told her I'm arachnophobic, and when I saw it I passed out and hit my head hard enough to need an ambulance. She decided she's won the war and I don't get a say in the matter. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my wife got me back for hiding a realistic tarantula replica in her underwear drawer. She ground up hot peppers and horseradish and shoved it in my mouth while I slept. I woke up screaming in pain and went to the hospital before she confessed. FML
Today, my girlfriend, KNOWING I have severe arachnophobia, changed the wallpapers on my phone and tablet to pictures of tarantulas, all because she's mad at me. And she won't change it back. FML
Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML
Today, I was with my girlfriend in her room. She starts screaming. Her father bursts in and, thinking I'm some kind of rapist, hits me in the head with a baseball bat. Not bad enough? I wasn't the one making her scream. There was a huge spider on the wall. FML
Today, my girlfriend bought me a pet tarantula. I now have one of my biggest fears crawling around my house. FML
Today, I thought it'd be funny to knee my sister's ass as she was bending over. What I didn't realise was that she was trying to pick up a spider. In shock, she threw it in the air and it landed on my chest. I ran into a wall trying to get it off. FML
Today, I finally gave in and agreed to try holding my girlfriend's pet tarantula. The moment I did, it bit me. According to her she’s had him 4 years and he’s never so much as nipped her, never mind a full bite. Lucky me. My hand is twice the normal size and I can feel my heartbeat in it. FML
Today, I saw a big, black spider on the floor of my bathroom. I promptly jumped up on the toilet seat, slipped off, and slammed my head against the wall. The best part? It was a tuft of my hair. FML
Today, while showering at my boyfriend's house early this morning, I saw a huge black spider on the wall. I'm allergic to spiders, so in my disorientation I ran out of the shower screaming, slipped, sprained my wrist, and bruised my tailbone. Turns out the spider was a clump of hair. My hair. FML
Today, I had no idea my girlfriend had such a poor sense of humour until I pranked her by hiding a plastic spider in the kitchen, and she broke up with me and asked me to move out. She’s not even arachnophobic, so I don’t get her extreme reaction. FML
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Top comments
JasonThorn 24
She discovered a weakness you never knew you had. I have to go with your girlfriend on this one. However, if she exploits it, THEN you need to have a little chat with her about boundaries.
Mathalamus 25
She kinda did win...
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Comments (17)
JasonThorn 24
She discovered a weakness you never knew you had. I have to go with your girlfriend on this one. However, if she exploits it, THEN you need to have a little chat with her about boundaries.
free_parking 3
grow a pair and stop being a little pussy
arkh_angel 16
Doesn't "I haven't yet told her" means he was well aware of this weakness? She just found it by luck.
Cole Manson 10
A weakness he never knew he had? He said in the post that he's afraid of spiders, he already knew.
free_parking 3
what a little pussy
Charlie Given 28
Prank wars are ridiculous because somebody always gets hurt 🙄
jkjorn 18
Winner winner, spiderweb spinner!
Mathalamus 25
She kinda did win...
crsyldy 19
She’s right
Cody Vertigo Bonthoux 15
find her fear and slap it on a picture
RichardPencil 32
She didn’t “decide” she won the prank war, she objectively did win! You were put to rout, and have no choice but to surrender or die. The best you can hope for is to retain a shred of dignity in the treaty negotiations.
wanted_2_want 40
“In war and love everything is valid. “
Mungolikecandy 19
Prank wars are great fun until someone goes to the hospital in tears. She won.