Today, my roommate thought it would be a good idea to show me his huge new tarantula despite knowing that I have extremely severe arachnophobia. I ended up killing it with a book and apparently now owe him $500. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the goddamned holy shit out of it. Trying to impress my cute new roommate, I scooped up the remains and showed him. It was his pet tarantula. FML
Today, my girlfriend bought me a pet tarantula. I now have one of my biggest fears crawling around my house. FML
Today, knowing that I have severe arachnophobia, my brother brought over his friend's tarantula. One hour later, the spider got loose. It's been 5 hours and I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML
Today, I spotted a huge spider in my bedroom. I freaked out at first, but I managed to confront my arachnophobia and killed it with a book. I was ecstatic and went to tell my boyfriend. By the time I returned to my room, the "dead" spider had vanished. Now I'm too scared to sleep. FML
Today, my boss captured a huge spider and put it in a jar on the desk in our shop. He's named it Fluffy and is threatening to fire me if I harm it. I'm horribly arachnophobic and we share that desk. FML
Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML
Today, I went to see a therapist for help with my severe fear of spiders. The therapist held a big spider in a box inches away from my face. I ran to the back of the room and asked him why. He responded with, "Aren't therapists supposed to help you face your fears?" I'm paying $150 an hour. FML
She definitely won though
Today, as part of our prank war, my girlfriend found a hairy tarantula picture and stuck it on the wall. I hadn't yet told her I'm arachnophobic, and when I saw it I passed out and hit my head hard enough to need an ambulance. She decided she's won the war and I don't get a say in the matter. FML
Shouldn't you be at the ER?
Today, I finally gave in and agreed to try holding my girlfriend's pet tarantula. The moment I did, it bit me. According to her she’s had him 4 years and he’s never so much as nipped her, never mind a full bite. Lucky me. My hand is twice the normal size and I can feel my heartbeat in it. FML
They're not real
Today, my girlfriend, KNOWING I have severe arachnophobia, changed the wallpapers on my phone and tablet to pictures of tarantulas, all because she's mad at me. And she won't change it back. FML
Top comments
KomiExplosion 0
This is why we can't have nice things.
whatfml 0
you sound an annoying, drama feeding, self loving teen. just saying "omg I would totally stand on it with like my platforms"
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Comments (336)
Richard16 0
lmao
Isabel312 0
that's a lot of money. just ask him where he bought it so you can buy him a new one. let's see what price he puts on it now.
Richard16 0
exactly it probably cost him 50$ and tryna make extra money for him self
pepersmiles 0
i know what thats like. my roommate showed me a pic of a spider even though she knows i have arachnophobia as well. i threw my water cup as a bad reaction and broke her phone!
wdupvato 0
Richard why u holding a gun I'n your pic you don't even look gangster I get scared when I see nerds with guns :(...
Richard16 0
nerd lmao
free2speak 14
OP also has an 'extremely severe' case of elaboration.
wdupvato 0
well u look like a ugly nerd just saying bra no offense stop trying to look cool online and we straight
javmuniz87 0
gun? u mean bong!
brycereid 0
38 he most likely changed it after feeling bad about himself because what was said was most-likely true
brycereid 0
I also noticed someone brought up his wimpy gun a few FMLs posted after this one, so he probably changed it for the reason that he is not gangster and probably just looked stupid (even tho the current picture is still stupid). sadly I didn't have the chance to see the picture.
hellogoodbye1996 6
you can get those free where I live. desert!
TomFeltonFan 0
are you so sure that the $500 was for the spider and not the book? maybe the book is an old collecters, or an autographed copy of a rare book, or maybe even a school text book for college. you never know.
insanesna1l 0
I'm guessing some of the money was to cover mental anguish
Nynaewe 4
then she should get paid to...
ScaughtieHolden 11
Hah, 25 made me laugh.
t765234 10
7,14,25- Or it may be the fact that exotic spiders are really ******* expensive, MAYBE that could be the reason he wanted $500 for a new one.
t765234 10
Also, if you had a friend who had an irrational fear of dogs abd you brought to your house and he killed your dog, would you charge him money? It's a pet just the same as a spider and i'm sure you'd be pissed if someone killed your pet
auto_da_fe 2
The whole point is that the roommate shouldn't have been such a huge asshole to show OP his supposedly expensive pet when he was aware of how bad the OP's phobia is. I don't think the roommate deserves to be paid anything, quite frankly.
Brittaneyyy 0
Richard16 are u black?
maszaros 9
236 - I think "pet" is a little strong for things like spiders, snails, hermit crabs, rocks... they all make ridiculous pets!
MissBunny25 0
glue it back together
KomiExplosion 0
Duct tape works better IMO.
22cute 17
Don't pay for it - he'll only buy another one!!
jacetopia96 1
hototototototot pic. nail it back together. no leave it dead, all spiders deserve a one way ticket to hell.
largefoofighter 0
The only way to get over your fear is to eat it!! just like you did with cum you little girl
TomFeltonFan 0
no, sewing does the best job, so sew it back together, heck, stuff it while you're at it! you can have a stuffed spider plushie; which is totally normal.
ILoveEggnog 7
Missbunny, your comment made me laugh so hard I nearly soiled my trousers.
ShyAnn29 15
I'm sure it exploded when she smashed with the book lol
khaya 9
Does anyone know CPR?
anorexicbarbie 8
That was ******* hilarious, 2.
b6000 0
missb you are everywhere..
MissBunny25 0
161 yes, thank you, I know >:)
PeopleWatcher 0
Hello MissBunny25! I'm hoping you're in Seattle, Miss-Fix-it for spiders. We can smoosh all the spiders up here & glue them all back together! ; )
game94 0
176 fail...
shoopd 19
If she was, she isn't anymore...
Ihatethesenames 0
that's when she strips
wtf20007 10
cable ties?
SceneRaver 0
I agree with 186, was that suppossed to be a pick up line?! lmfao! you suck!
lunia567 0
bro ur like 20 years older than her stop it creeper
CommonSenseKarma 17
More like 15. She looks college to me. idk, I'm a high school junior :P
TomFeltonFan 0
213, the **** is with your profile picture? 0.0
AwesomeAsFcuk 0
I wonder if cum is a good replacement for glue....
JenL_fml 7
263, what the hell? o.O
KomiExplosion 0
This is why we can't have nice things.
ayleyyasuko 0
el. oh. el.
TomFeltonFan 0
what the **** is an 'el. oh. el.'? you meant 'lol'? it's not cute, it just makes you look stupid.
Randuhh_17 4
lmfao...I imagined the rainbow saying that...haha.
dayve 0
el. oh. el.
Blazingcrono 6
El. Em. Ay. Oh.
GeraldisTheG 3
Ar. Oh. Ef. El
ipwnlosers 4
Oh. Em. Gee.
awardZu 0
Es. Tee. Ef. Yoo.
Ale8900 3
wow, you started an extremely gay trend
MissBunny25 0
C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!!!!
sloppyflow 1
Eff.You.See.Kay
oblio 0
archer?
perradize 0
lmao! family guy!!
Mirorbo 27
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
EEEEEEEEE!! Why would they do such a thing?! Ew ew ew! I would have stomped it with my platforms straight away!! I'm going to have nightmares about spiders now!!
whatfml 0
you sound an annoying, drama feeding, self loving teen. just saying "omg I would totally stand on it with like my platforms"
TomFeltonFan 0
I have a pretty good feeling that he is being sarcastic and making fun of those kinds of people.
WOGBRO 6
LOL
smlz4me 1
4, I agree, spiders scare me soo much. 58, your an asshole
smileeee_fml 0
#58 , LOLL
ILoveSomeFun 0
How do you guys not know about Miror B! He's a famous Pokemon snagger and he makes his appearances in Pokemon Colosseum and XD Gale of Darkness! Haven't you heard of Ludicolo???
Ale8900 3
No because I'm not ten years old...
MakaylaCommisso 0
you sound like a drama queen stfu I don't like them ...but I'm not gonna go stomp it out let it be
asmb100 27
What's wrong with spiders? They're so cute, and the way they move is awesome. People think "Oh, it's a spider, it'll bite me and I'll die!" Tarantulas can't kill people. It'll hurt, but you won't die. I know people with arachnophobia, but it's not because they think "spiders are gross". My sister's arachnophobia comes from knowing someone who was hospitalized by a spider bite. Your arachnophobia comes form misinformation. I caught this spider once who just wanted to be friends. Never bit me, never was scared of me, then one day, someone like you killed it. Read up on your facts before you're scared of things. You being afraid of spiders is like me being afraid of flying because I think "90% of planes crash". It annoys me so much when people are afraid of things because of ideas and misinformation. Why would anybody kill a pet spider? If someone's holding a spider, or has it in a terrarium, why would you kill it? You know that whoever has it is not killing it for some reason. If you don't like it, don't go near it. I've been scared by spiders once or twice, but I'm not going to always avoid them. People are like spiders the way they are with pit bulls. A pit bull rarely ever bites anyone, but when they do, everybody says put bulls need to be exterminated. This rant is starting to get out of hand. Get over your irrational fear of spiders, or at least don't kill every single one you see. Have a nice day.
unidentified_sta 5
KILL IT WITH FIRE!
deathpotato 11
It's already dead jackass.
Richard16 0
win^
unidentified_sta 5
I'd rather double-check.
gutzzzz 0
rule #4: double tap
TomFeltonFan 0
60, lol I was going to say that earlier! XD but hey, you beat me to it :P
TheNewGuy03 29
you can't forget rule #1, either. just in case you gotta get the **** outta dodge... i mean, who wants to be attacked by a zombie spider? |the kid|
ILoveEggnog 7
I always torch anything that appears to be a threat.
PwningLamp1 0
60 - Zombieland LOL
RomanBeauty 0
laughed my ass off- SPLAT! poor thing but I can picture this happening and that's hysterical.
DippinGrizzly907 27
Always double tap! Never know if they'll get back up after only one hit...
frostygalerinaa 2
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
murderer!:(
That_0ne 4
You can't "murder" an animal moron.
CAPTmok 7
lol!! I would have probably done the same
PeteyPablo12308 20
I completely agree with you... I absolutely HATE spiders. I would probably have pooped/peed my pants as well as smashing the horrifying creature.
DippinGrizzly907 27
I hate spiders as much as the next person. But really? Pooped/ pee yourself? I've lost faith in humanity once again...
cocainewhore 30
You're all assholes. The spider didn't do anything wrong, killing it was unfair. Sure the roommate shouldn't have bought it, but OP had no right to murder it.
whipmie87 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
was it hurting you? then you shouldn't have injured it. unless it was on you you shouldn't have freaked and especially murder the poor creature.
kaylanicole1255 1
Did you NOT see she/he is serverly afraid of spiders???? You obv dont have a fear! You can NOT control your fear or reactions to your fear! Im DEATHLY afraid of spiders! I litterally STOP breathing, not by my own choice, when I see one!
Jazziieeeeeee 2
#34 well said
docscientist 10
Irrational fear, she owes him $500.
TomFeltonFan 0
34, doesn't mean they had to kill it.
TomFeltonFan 0
**have not had
Randuhh_17 4
no, if you have a severe phobia of something...it's not that simple. im deathly afraid of snakes, and my biology teacher put me next to the snake tank..said I'd get over my fears. well when she fed the snake, gettin over my fears was tripping over two desk to get away.
PeteyPablo12308 20
I love love looooove True Blood.
PeteyPablo12308 20
By the way #34, you are absolutely right. Personally, I am not a rational or coherent human being when I am faced with a spider.
DjeePee 25
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
My boyfriend is deathly afraid of butterflies. He does not dare kill them. It's hard to believe that someone who has an extremely severe arachnophobia dares to kill a big, hairy, scary tarantula. The most logic reaction is that you would run and hide. YTDI, OP. Not because of the phobia (although you can get it cured...), but because you destroyed aka killed someone else his property. Imagine someone with a hamsterphobia smacking hamsters dead. Juk.
pesky132 0
very well said. if its not doing anything but sitting therr why bother?
odexy 12
I have a fear of bees, but I still don't freak out and kill it if I see one. :/
xgetxbentx 13
9 - she's arachnophobic, when someone has a phobia like that they often lose control of their reactions or have a panic attack. apparently op loses their ability to think first. considering op's roommate knew that op has arachnophobia, it's kind of their fault, they should have taken into consideration what some peoples reaction to spiders are. it's also not murder, murder is the unlawful killing of a being, usually human, done with malice and forethought. killing spiders is legal.
keiran215 1
Have you considered that, rather than intentionally smashing the spider, OP may have simply swatted at it while already holding the book? Spiders are fairly fragile and that could easily have killed it. OP's roommate is an idiot, he intentionally caused OP distress and now is claiming to be owed far more than that spider ever cost him.
HansHansen 8
Thank god there are at least a few users with common sense and with commiseration for that poor animal. OP is a cruel ****.
Eorlas 31
fear is your body's response to a perceived (aka cognitive based) threat. it evokes the fight or flight response. therefore, if the spider was shown close enough to OP, they probably felt endangered and thus the survival response was to fight for life. the OP said it was a severe phobia so this would be my guess. we just studied phobia's in abnormal psychology.
Snowlight_fml 7
You're scared of something, so you kill it?
explodingmuffint 0
it's irrational. I have a severe fear of heights yet I'm a firefighter and have to go up ladders all then time.
himoonkey 8
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
hey if she was afraid of humans, would she kill everyone? huh? HUH?! bitch
Kaneila0517 0
well she's not a spider either... just saying
Grimmerie 31
i have severe coulrophobia (even a picture or drawing will set me off) and i have never killed a clown.
ScreamingSkullz9 0
Not his fault, roommate knew he had archnophobia so he gets a pet tarantula? What an asshole sorry OP, that sucks.
ViviMage 40
Phobias are irrational fears. She freaked out just seeing it.
asmb100 27
Her roommate owned the spider, the spider is the roommate's property. She damaged the roommates property. Also, since it was a pet, it could probably be considered animal abuse.
1two3four5six 23
you guys clearly lack understanding of what a phobia is.
klonopin_ftw 0
**** him. what's he gonna do if you don't pay him? complain? his fault
LukeSkywalker28 0
Exactly. If you **** him, he'll forget about the $500
muffpuncher 0
yeah but then he will have inadvertently paid or a probably ugly, $500 hooker.
blackbird31 0
Wow ydi Why kill it? It wasn't like it would kill you in any way, or even hurt you. Man up and stop freaking out over such trivial things.
REGGIEstration 4
OP clearly said he/she has "SEVER ARACHNOPHOBIA". In case you're wondering what that is, look it up...
Thanatos1206 0
So OP has "cut off arachnophobia"? Interesting...
TaylorTotsYumm 10
I'm shit scared of spiders, but I don't kill them. I make someone else put them back outside for me.
TaylorTotsYumm 10
I'm shit scared of spiders, but I don't kill them. I make someone else put them back outside for me.
LaFemmeQuiRit 3
"sever" ? Anyway, there are people who have severe fears of dogs and clowns, but they don't kill dogs and clowns when they see them ! Just because you have an IRRATIONAL fear doesn't mean you have to kill the thing that makes you afraid ! Most people with truly severe phobias would be too afraid to act in that situation and would probably break down hyperventilating/sobbing rather than killing the thing they are afraid of.
NoOneLovesYou 13
If severe phobias mean I can kill it to make it get away.... those ******' clowns better watch out. Don't get all ethical on me now, I have a SEVERE case, after all. I'll do anything to make it go away. ;)
chicagolady 3
A fear of spiders is in not way "irrational". Seeing as some spiders are deadly and can kill you, being deathly afraid of them is a evolutionary way for people to stay way from or instants kill a possible threat to their life.
t765234 10
132- There are only a few, I can only think of about 4-5 that are deadly with treatment, which is easily obtainable at almost any hospital, and maybe 10-ish that can kill you without treatment if you are not a small child or elderly person. So please STFU spiders are very seldom deadly and almost never when they are not provoked. Almost every human has the ability to kill you, don't see many victims a phobia of humans do you.
Pazu_fml 10
"Anyway, there are people who have severe fears of dogs and clowns, but they don't kill dogs and clowns when they see them !" If someone with a fear of dogs has a dog jump up at them, they would likely try to swat it away. Same with any other large animal, and same with any small animal or insect, as long as the fear is there. A sudden and intense fear leads to the fight or flight response: people either run or try to swat the danger away. It's an automatic reaction that can't be helped. Because a spider is more fragile than a dog or a clown, that simple 'swat it away' response can be fatal for them, whether one intends to kill the spider or not.
LaFemmeQuiRit 3
First, everyone knows what fight or flight is, so the explanation was unnecessary. Anyway, the fight or flight response is suppressible : the OP could have taken a moment to assess the situation instead of being mean and killing the innocent spider ! Also, what about flight ? No matter how you put it, the OP really did have a choice and should have thought through his or her actions. Even if s/he was freaking out, s/he didn't have to kill the spider. Also, it's stupid to bring up the spider jumping on the OP because that's nowhere in the post. (Please excuse my English, it's not my first language.)
wlfmanjack 5
do you know why some snakes out there bite humans? Its because they are more afraid of humans then humans are afraid of snakes. what it comes down to it is that the roommate wanted to show op the spider, knowing fully well that op was afraid of them. Clearly the roommate wanted a good laugh at op reaction to see him/her to freak out, but what it comes right to it he/she acted out of reflex when his/her fears came up. Its really the roommate's fault for endangering his pet. op just acted out of defense like if a piousness snake saw a five year old (its sad but true). His/her roommate should have known what was going to happen