Today, my roommate thought it would be a good idea to show me his huge new tarantula despite knowing that I have extremely severe arachnophobia. I ended up killing it with a book and apparently now owe him $500. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the goddamned holy shit out of it. Trying to impress my cute new roommate, I scooped up the remains and showed him. It was his pet tarantula. FML
Today, my girlfriend bought me a pet tarantula. I now have one of my biggest fears crawling around my house. FML
Today, knowing that I have severe arachnophobia, my brother brought over his friend's tarantula. One hour later, the spider got loose. It's been 5 hours and I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML
Today, I spotted a huge spider in my bedroom. I freaked out at first, but I managed to confront my arachnophobia and killed it with a book. I was ecstatic and went to tell my boyfriend. By the time I returned to my room, the "dead" spider had vanished. Now I'm too scared to sleep. FML
Today, my boss captured a huge spider and put it in a jar on the desk in our shop. He's named it Fluffy and is threatening to fire me if I harm it. I'm horribly arachnophobic and we share that desk. FML
Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML
Today, I went to see a therapist for help with my severe fear of spiders. The therapist held a big spider in a box inches away from my face. I ran to the back of the room and asked him why. He responded with, "Aren't therapists supposed to help you face your fears?" I'm paying $150 an hour. FML
Today, as part of our prank war, my girlfriend found a hairy tarantula picture and stuck it on the wall. I hadn't yet told her I'm arachnophobic, and when I saw it I passed out and hit my head hard enough to need an ambulance. She decided she's won the war and I don't get a say in the matter. FML
Today, I finally gave in and agreed to try holding my girlfriend's pet tarantula. The moment I did, it bit me. According to her she’s had him 4 years and he’s never so much as nipped her, never mind a full bite. Lucky me. My hand is twice the normal size and I can feel my heartbeat in it. FML
Today, my girlfriend, KNOWING I have severe arachnophobia, changed the wallpapers on my phone and tablet to pictures of tarantulas, all because she's mad at me. And she won't change it back. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
KomiExplosion 0
This is why we can't have nice things.
whatfml 0
you sound an annoying, drama feeding, self loving teen. just saying "omg I would totally stand on it with like my platforms"
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (336)
monkeyluvz 7
Hell yea! Id kill that thing too! He knew you were afriad of it, tough shit on his part. Lesson learned, eh??
rlatpffl86 0
I HATE spiders and think they should all die, but it WAS his pet. It's like running over your friend's dog because your afraid of dogs.. so I guess it makes sense to pay him. But why someone would spend $500 on a spider is beyond me.
rpelct4ever 0
p matalica adult female and more
klong91 7
He's an asshole for showing it to you knowing you have a fear of spiders. Why didn't he just put it away when you started to freak out? It's partly his fault. What kind of taruantula cost 500$ anyway?
rpelct4ever 0
p matalica adult female
rpelct4ever 0
and more
dancer010 0
I would kill it too!!!
pesky132 0
you need to respect his property. imagine if you got a pet he happened to have a fear of and he just walks in and stomps it dead. grow some balls
EGORAPTOR 7
was it a girl one girl ones are very nice and most likely won't hurt you
rpelct4ever 0
wow u do not no try to hold a female cobalt blue
pesky132 0
also, if youre deathly afraid of it then why did you get close enough to kill it. youre not very smart
underpaid011 0
check that price at the large hairy spider store. $500 sounds like a lot to pay for a bug, he might be trying to run a game on you.
redheadcaligurl 0
$500 is BS you can find then for $20 sometimes less. move out that guy is an ass!
JenL_fml 7
You're both at fault. Him for showing you the spider when he knows you're deathly scared, and you for killing the guy's pet. When you're afraid of something, you have two options, fight or flight. You should have chosen flight in this case. :/ You owe him $500.