Today, my roommate thought it would be a good idea to show me his huge new tarantula despite knowing that I have extremely severe arachnophobia. I ended up killing it with a book and apparently now owe him $500. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the goddamned holy shit out of it. Trying to impress my cute new roommate, I scooped up the remains and showed him. It was his pet tarantula. FML
Today, my girlfriend bought me a pet tarantula. I now have one of my biggest fears crawling around my house. FML
Today, knowing that I have severe arachnophobia, my brother brought over his friend's tarantula. One hour later, the spider got loose. It's been 5 hours and I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML
Today, I spotted a huge spider in my bedroom. I freaked out at first, but I managed to confront my arachnophobia and killed it with a book. I was ecstatic and went to tell my boyfriend. By the time I returned to my room, the "dead" spider had vanished. Now I'm too scared to sleep. FML
Today, my boss captured a huge spider and put it in a jar on the desk in our shop. He's named it Fluffy and is threatening to fire me if I harm it. I'm horribly arachnophobic and we share that desk. FML
Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML
Today, I went to see a therapist for help with my severe fear of spiders. The therapist held a big spider in a box inches away from my face. I ran to the back of the room and asked him why. He responded with, "Aren't therapists supposed to help you face your fears?" I'm paying $150 an hour. FML
Today, as part of our prank war, my girlfriend found a hairy tarantula picture and stuck it on the wall. I hadn't yet told her I'm arachnophobic, and when I saw it I passed out and hit my head hard enough to need an ambulance. She decided she's won the war and I don't get a say in the matter. FML
Today, I finally gave in and agreed to try holding my girlfriend's pet tarantula. The moment I did, it bit me. According to her she’s had him 4 years and he’s never so much as nipped her, never mind a full bite. Lucky me. My hand is twice the normal size and I can feel my heartbeat in it. FML
Today, my girlfriend, KNOWING I have severe arachnophobia, changed the wallpapers on my phone and tablet to pictures of tarantulas, all because she's mad at me. And she won't change it back. FML
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Top comments
KomiExplosion 0
This is why we can't have nice things.
whatfml 0
you sound an annoying, drama feeding, self loving teen. just saying "omg I would totally stand on it with like my platforms"
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Comments (336)
TomFeltonFan 0
* I meant to not too
TomFeltonFan 0
okay, in, you do that. and thank you for noticing my rainbow, it's what I'd be doing if I saw you. (: goodbye.
supahnazi 0
cnt b too severe if u killed it. i cnt evn go near spiders
Hawkcody1958 1
stupid roomate,you should have pounded him in the face with your shoe after you killed his ******* spider asshole!
sadistmonkey 19
The FML comment thread is filled with idiots who draw a moral equivalence between tarantulas and dogs and people who obviously don't know what the definition of an irrational fear is. Irrational means irrational. As in, you can't do anything about it.
GeneralMotors 23
who would pay $500 for a spider?
bnvc 0
i have that phobia too. sh!t son.
whoaitsnachelle 0
If you were really that scared of it, wouldn't you of just ran away? Iv never seen someone terrified of spiders actually kill one themselves.
Masuabie 3
When I was little, I was bitten and hospitalized from a Brown Recluse spider. Ever since then, I have had severe arachnophobia. I completely understand how the OP feels. If one of my friends, let alone my room mate, had a spider, they would know not to bring it near me. I am assuming she just grabbed the book and either swatted it or threw the book at it. This would be my first reaction before trying to run away. I would do the same if someone presented a spider to me, no matter what kind it is.
ileenefudge 29
Brown recluse spiders are dangerous and scary mother *******. Never been bit and don't plan on it, but it doesn't matter what kind I see. my ass is out if there before it comes near me.
CreepyCrumpet 2
$500 is BS. I have over 20 Tarantulas and I'm telling you the cost between $30 to at the most $150
rpelct4ever 0
I have 21 look up adult female p matalica the can cost that much
rpelct4ever 0
they not the sorry