Today, my mother is trying to convince me to divorce my husband. He has a tattoo of a skull on his shoulder and she believes this means he kills people. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mother threatened to disown me if I didn't break up with my tattooed girlfriend. FML
Today, my mom got drunk and started crying at my after-wedding party, after promising she'd behave herself. She thinks my husband is an awful person who'll drag me into a life of sin, all because he has a tattoo and an ear piercing. FML
Today, my mom tried to burn my arm with a hot spatula, all because I got a tattoo against her wishes. FML
Today, I got a tattoo. My mom got upset and threw a bitch fit about how my body "is a temple and it belongs to God.” I told her, “My body, my choice.” She responded with, “Oh really? Well, my house, my choice who lives here. Pack your shit and get the fuck out.” I’m currently in my car with nowhere to go. FML
Today, I realized my husband and I have been fighting a lot lately, so to show him how much I care, I got a tattoo with his name on it. He hates it. FML
Today, my mom wants me to get an exorcism because piercings, tattoos, my own car, my own career, moving out of her house, and wanting zero contact with her from now on are "sure signs of demonic possession", maybe even the influence of Lucifer himself. FML
Today, despite my warnings and knowing I hate them, my wife got a trashy tattoo of an eye on her ankle, like she’s Count Olaf. How is she going to get a job with that thing? FML
Today, my mom told me I'm the reason she's going to kill herself one day. FML
Today, my mother straight up admitted that she would murder me if God told her to. FML
Today, my mother-in-law constantly threatens to commit suicide, unless my husband pays her bills. He told me I don’t care about his happiness because I told him he can’t keep giving in to her guilt trips. FML
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Top comments
EpicSquishii 21
Watch out before he gets you!!!
Molson87 3
Is that a duck face?
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Comments (183)
misskayyyteee 3
Or tell him to get a tattoo that says "I don't kill people"! :D
Blaqkeyeliner 6
I have a huge tattoo on my back of a raven. I am really interested in knowing what your mother would say about it.
Pandacupcakelove 26
Wow.... Oh but she means well! Still sounds kind og paranoid, though...
bugmenotmofo 34
An unfunny one at that.
badbadkitty 5
I have a skull on my shoulder too and let me tell you, shanking people is my number one hobby of choice!
CessnaPilot 5
I have a burning skull on my shoulder. Have had it 40 years. Haven't killed anybody.
Calyx_fml 22
Procrastinator.
challan 19
But how many people have you burned?!!!
pexy_fml 16
She is a tattoo converter
bluejayscheer 7
It's the Dark Mark!!!!!
eringray101010 3
Ha I would be in trouble if that were my mon and husband, he has several skulls, one set is the heaven and hell skulls, the others blend into another tattoo and aren't too noticeable. But my mother loves my husband! He is an excellent provider, loves to work hard for us
kandi_kid69 15
Why do people say it's a joke or sarcasm after they've been proved wrong and whatnot?