Today, my mom still hasn't gotten over the novelty of our brand new microwave. We've been eating hot pockets for nearly a week now. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mother-in-law gifted us with a new microwave. I told her it was too much and we didn't really need it. Her response, "I just want my grandkids to have food that tastes good for once." I'm a chef. FML
Today, I was preparing food in the microwave. I hadn't noticed that a fly had flown in until I noticed its melted corpse engraved into my hot-pocket. FML
Today, I was grocery shopping. When I got to the frozen foods, I saw some Lean Pockets, which I haven't had in forever, so I bought a couple of boxes. Around lunch time, I was hungry and thought I could have some, until I realized why I stopped buying them: I don't have a microwave. FML
Today, all three of my meals consisted of two Hot Pockets. FML
Today, I was so tired at work that I stared at the microwave waiting for my food. It was a full minute before I realized I'd never actually turned it on after I'd put the food in it. FML
Today, my mother went shopping. She bought three boxes of Popsicles and a giant stuffed dog. She did not buy dinner or toilet paper. I've eaten nothing but cereal and popcorn for three days now. FML
Today, my always over-emotional husband burst into sobs when I thanked him for making me lunch. Apparently, I did not compliment his cooking enough. He microwaved me a Hot Pocket; it was still frozen in the middle. FML
Today, I made myself a hot pocket for lunch. I managed to scald myself on the red-hot cheese, and at the same time bite into the center, which was somehow still frozen solid. FML
Today, my 5 year old daughter figured out how to use the microwave, microwaving my brand new 3G iphone. It was completely wrecked. So was the microwave. FML
Today, I was craving some popcorn, so I went to the supermarket and bought the microwaveable type. When I got home, I remembered I didn't have a microwave. FML
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Top comments
txgirl2013 14
Hot Pockets are good!
DjBlaze 0
That sounds amazing
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Comments (121)
beachbabe830 0
and this is on FML because....
Jimster1712 0
i like the ones from alabama... giggity
ImaSexualTiger 6
Haha that made my day thank you sir
Ebola_fml 20
electromagnetic waves and radiation are different things entirely. microwaves give off the former. alpha, beta, and gamma are forms of radiation, and a microwave does not emit any of them.
kduubb 7
if you don't like them, then stop bitchin & make your own food !
Skaterdude243 4
what Hotpockets are so good
mab_987 5
Convince her to get a variety of TV dinners. Then everybody wins.
stoneywoney 3
FML!! More like TML!! (thank my life) HOT POCKETS are amazing!!!! But you do have a point, sometimes a real meal is what ya need.
peete182 0
cook your own god damn food and stop whining
discipleX 0
hot pockets are the best
Salkadi 9
I didn't realize it was still the 1950s
PrimeStarscream 30
Stop whining. Get off your butt and make your own food. You're lucky you have food. Some poor folks would give anything for a bite of what you're eating.