Today, my mom still hasn't gotten over the novelty of our brand new microwave. We've been eating hot pockets for nearly a week now. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mother-in-law gifted us with a new microwave. I told her it was too much and we didn't really need it. Her response, "I just want my grandkids to have food that tastes good for once." I'm a chef. FML
Today, I was preparing food in the microwave. I hadn't noticed that a fly had flown in until I noticed its melted corpse engraved into my hot-pocket. FML
Today, I was grocery shopping. When I got to the frozen foods, I saw some Lean Pockets, which I haven't had in forever, so I bought a couple of boxes. Around lunch time, I was hungry and thought I could have some, until I realized why I stopped buying them: I don't have a microwave. FML
Today, all three of my meals consisted of two Hot Pockets. FML
Today, I was so tired at work that I stared at the microwave waiting for my food. It was a full minute before I realized I'd never actually turned it on after I'd put the food in it. FML
Today, my mother went shopping. She bought three boxes of Popsicles and a giant stuffed dog. She did not buy dinner or toilet paper. I've eaten nothing but cereal and popcorn for three days now. FML
Today, my always over-emotional husband burst into sobs when I thanked him for making me lunch. Apparently, I did not compliment his cooking enough. He microwaved me a Hot Pocket; it was still frozen in the middle. FML
Today, I made myself a hot pocket for lunch. I managed to scald myself on the red-hot cheese, and at the same time bite into the center, which was somehow still frozen solid. FML
Today, my 5 year old daughter figured out how to use the microwave, microwaving my brand new 3G iphone. It was completely wrecked. So was the microwave. FML
Today, I was craving some popcorn, so I went to the supermarket and bought the microwaveable type. When I got home, I remembered I didn't have a microwave. FML
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Top comments
txgirl2013 14
Hot Pockets are good!
DjBlaze 0
That sounds amazing
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Comments (121)
TheBrickWithouse 10
Consider yourself lucky. That's more than most kids in Africa get.
SweetJTBR 22
True, but eating the same thing for a week... Damn. OP, why don't you cook something yourself? Don't be Lazy :D
txgirl2013 14
Hot Pockets are good!
chuckychan 8
at least you have a microwave and food =(
Ugi 27
You might like to add a little fruit to your diet to avoid going scurvy. Beyond that, what's the issue?
wasabiinurvagina 0
hot pockets are the bomb!
knightsfb 0
op could just make a sandwich....
slitherbomb 0
hot pockets are delicious but give me chronic diarrhea!
Ugi 27
35 - I could have lived without knowing that!
tandem123 6
I think I've eaten hot pockets almost every day this summer. maybe twice I've eaten other stuff.
iloveeyouuxD 9
7- how do you have an iPod or a computer and wifi but no food?? hmm.
jvillan87 5
This is 2011...who the **** doesn't have a microwave by now?
MoreThan1lol 0
hot pockets are gross, bleh... I'd rather drink cooking oil.
ballstomper 0
Jim gaffigan would be proud
iMuffinKat 16
Great chance to learn to cook your own food, Op.
DjBlaze 0
That sounds amazing
chickunkey 0
At least she's not making you eat. "lean pockets" Those things taste like shit.
Quest_ 13
I believe this is what is referred to as a 'white people problem'.
BrimfullOfAsher 20
Is it at least an improvement from her regular cooking?
broomhildo 19
Run. Run while you can.
BeautifulDemonKP 4
hot pockets are yummy but may i ask cant you make your own food?
banana1227 0
really cuz I hate you!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cinn_fml 23
Hm, why do I feel that there are a number of solutions to this problem? Such as suggesting other things to cook in a microwave or cooking your own food...
kiran_fml 5
soo true they can make their own food
ambizzles 6
I love hot pockets!
Climaxx 11
Well you make dinner then, give her a break from the radiation microwaves give off.
Ebola_fml 20
someone doesn't know how microwaves work...
Soloman212 28
Someone doesn't know that the microwaves a microwave gives off is a form of radiation...
Babalu722 3
they give off radiation
ImaSexualTiger 6
Yes they do, that's why pregnant women aren't suppose to stand infront of a running microwave
Cinn_fml 23
In Ebola's defence, they never say who doesn't know, they just say 'someone'.
Ebola_fml 20
Microwaves emit energy in the electromagnetic spectrum. Alpha, beta, and gamma are the forms of radiation. They are entirely different things. I hate to break it to you kids, but x-rays are also electromagnetic waves and not a form of radiation.
vexis58 1
Technically, everything on the electromagnetic spectrum is considered "radiation". Microwaves are radiation. So are x-rays. So are radio waves. So is the visible light that allows you to see, and the ultraviolet rays that burn your skin. Problem is, when people think of "radiation", they usually think of the harmful ionizing radiation that is emitted by radioactive substances. And microwaves are not one of those.
Cinn_fml 23
What Vexis said really, Ebola; all types of ionising radiation are types of radiation, but not all radiation is ionising.
Ebola_fml 20
My point being that microwaves don't give off dangerous radiation that is transferred to food as the original comment led one to believe. Microwaves do not make the food unsafe due to radiation. The energy transferred is no different than white light heating a black piece of paper. Quite a few people have a misconception about microwaves being unsafe.