Today, my husband was planning on getting me my favorite movie as an anniversary present; I ended up buying it. He had to give me the money and leave because he is severely arachnophobic and couldn't even pick up the box. I have to hide the movie for fear of it being destroyed. Again. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, trying to be romantic, I invited my girlfriend over to watch a movie. I said she could pick one up on the way, and I'd pay for it later. I ended up having to suffer through some "movie" that involved nothing but Nicolas Cage gurning like a stroke victim between crappy fight scenes. FML
Today, the guy I'm dating found out I have severe arachnophobia. He downloaded a picture of a huge, hairy spider and set it as background on my iPhone. I can't even unlock my phone, as every time I try, the spider pops up and I drop the phone. He laughs every time I do it. FML
Today, my boyfriend convinced me to face my fear of horror movies by promising to hold my hand through the entire flick. He fell asleep 10 minutes into it, farting and snoring in his sleep, whilst I was paralysed by fear. FML
Today, I went to see Paranormal Activity 2 with my boyfriend. In hopes of him putting his arm around me or holding my hand, I told him that I was very scared and pretended to cry a little. He told me to be quiet because I was ruining the movie for him. Then he moved seats. FML
Today, I asked a girl I like to the movies. Wanting her to lean on me and stay in my arms during the movie, I chose a horror film. I screamed like a pussy the whole time. FML
Today, my roommate thought it would be a good idea to show me his huge new tarantula despite knowing that I have extremely severe arachnophobia. I ended up killing it with a book and apparently now owe him $500. FML
Today, my boyfriend of 5 years got down on one knee with the most beautiful ring box I’d ever seen. My heart raced and my eyes immediately filled with tears in anticipation! When he finally opened it, a fucking spider was inside! I nearly shat myself in terror while he laughed hysterically. FML
Today, my girlfriend, KNOWING I have severe arachnophobia, changed the wallpapers on my phone and tablet to pictures of tarantulas, all because she's mad at me. And she won't change it back. FML
Today, my boyfriend was complaining about how we never see the movies he wants to see. So I took him to the movies, and he picked which one. Then he fell asleep. FML
Today, I found out my husband put a parental block on the TV so I couldn't rent a movie. I'm 42. FML
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Top comments
fmljerry26 3
Spiderman obviously.
LordoftheOcelots 10
C'mon people, use your head. We all know Charlotte's Web takes the cake.
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Comments (168)
Techtacular 0
He tried even dispite his fears. Hardly an F- YOUR life.
herponi 2
Sounds like the movie is Arachnophobia
darkcosinus 16
You do know that arachnophobia is perfectly curable with only a few visits to the shrink, right?
KiddNYC1O 22
Surely it depends on the person and extent of the phobia.
KawaiiMira 1
I agree. Depends on the severity of the fear. What may be "easier" for some, others might find it more difficult. It's about the person's perception of the fear.
gilliaga73 18
If he's too afraid of the box to pay for the DVD, how is he going to get close enough to it to destroy it?
KiddNYC1O 22
Charlotte's Web for sure.
Skarkie321 18
I'm guessing either Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets or Spider-Man? But Spider-Man really doesn't have actual spiders in it
SwtCherryPie 26
Or it could be the movie called Arachnophobia.
wanderingshopper 13
Idiot.
PhishloverA 14
I don't like spiders much either but I never thought spiders on a movie case were so bad. I don't mean spiders walking on them either
doglover100 29
I'd take him to a shrink.
xxoreo 3
I agree with him , spiders are scary
madhouse1212 2
Sounds like Arachnophobia the movie. Lol sorry OP good luck hiding it