Today, my husband was planning on getting me my favorite movie as an anniversary present; I ended up buying it. He had to give me the money and leave because he is severely arachnophobic and couldn't even pick up the box. I have to hide the movie for fear of it being destroyed. Again. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, trying to be romantic, I invited my girlfriend over to watch a movie. I said she could pick one up on the way, and I'd pay for it later. I ended up having to suffer through some "movie" that involved nothing but Nicolas Cage gurning like a stroke victim between crappy fight scenes. FML
Today, the guy I'm dating found out I have severe arachnophobia. He downloaded a picture of a huge, hairy spider and set it as background on my iPhone. I can't even unlock my phone, as every time I try, the spider pops up and I drop the phone. He laughs every time I do it. FML
Today, my boyfriend convinced me to face my fear of horror movies by promising to hold my hand through the entire flick. He fell asleep 10 minutes into it, farting and snoring in his sleep, whilst I was paralysed by fear. FML
Today, I went to see Paranormal Activity 2 with my boyfriend. In hopes of him putting his arm around me or holding my hand, I told him that I was very scared and pretended to cry a little. He told me to be quiet because I was ruining the movie for him. Then he moved seats. FML
Today, I asked a girl I like to the movies. Wanting her to lean on me and stay in my arms during the movie, I chose a horror film. I screamed like a pussy the whole time. FML
Today, my roommate thought it would be a good idea to show me his huge new tarantula despite knowing that I have extremely severe arachnophobia. I ended up killing it with a book and apparently now owe him $500. FML
Today, my boyfriend of 5 years got down on one knee with the most beautiful ring box I’d ever seen. My heart raced and my eyes immediately filled with tears in anticipation! When he finally opened it, a fucking spider was inside! I nearly shat myself in terror while he laughed hysterically. FML
Today, my girlfriend, KNOWING I have severe arachnophobia, changed the wallpapers on my phone and tablet to pictures of tarantulas, all because she's mad at me. And she won't change it back. FML
Today, my boyfriend was complaining about how we never see the movies he wants to see. So I took him to the movies, and he picked which one. Then he fell asleep. FML
Today, I found out my husband put a parental block on the TV so I couldn't rent a movie. I'm 42. FML
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Top comments
fmljerry26 3
Spiderman obviously.
LordoftheOcelots 10
C'mon people, use your head. We all know Charlotte's Web takes the cake.
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Comments (168)
Naith 14
Unlucky OP but on the bright side I am first. Just make sure it safe what ever you do plus your husband should be more like my sister and leave the room screaming
Kiki242 19
I thought these I am first comments died.
guckylynn 19
What movie could bring about such a negative reaction?
Zoh_Aubrey 8
A movie about spiders, obviously.
Lalo16 6
Eight Legged Freaks is a nightmare for arachnophobic people.
killer6969 16
At least he tried u know some ppl wouldn't even but u a present
Unibear 1
21-huh?
BunchieRules 31
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets? Though I'm not arachnophobic, Aragog still gives me the creeps.
yoyoforpeace 14
Sounds like he has Pygmachophobia.
fmljerry26 3
Spiderman obviously.
Donat96 20
Maybe it was Kingdom of the Spiders.
sens3sfailing 25
30-I was thinking the same thing but idk if the cover has Argog on it. Does anybody know by some chance? He is probably on one of the versions
BunchieRules 31
46 - Not sure about the cover, but it was the second spider movie that came to mind. The first was "Eight Legged Freak", which was obviously already taken.
PleaseStayChill 9
I am severely, insanely arachnophobic and 8-legged freaks didn't scare me. It was just ridiculous. Arachnophobia scared the holy hell out of me, though.
DerrickJames 33
It was obviously Spider-Man.
jessughka 10
Arachnaphobia is right! Be careful when you go to put on your boots! I still can't watch that movie, freaked me out when I was young
LordoftheOcelots 10
C'mon people, use your head. We all know Charlotte's Web takes the cake.
LolFMLnot 10
At least he didn't make you pay for it.
skatecboy45 8
Arachnophobia
JerryH 9
Was it Eight Legged Freaks? If I know and arachnophobe, that would be the worst movie for one to watch
silbot 11
28- don't mind the socially awkward penguin
Posthuman 26
86, he is the socially AWESOME penguin. You just don't see many because sadly it is a dying breed
Forlorn420 9
How many more people are gonna say arachnaphobia or eight legged freaks????
missalkali 8
100- you mean the baloney islands. baloney
emilypitt92 3
Why did so many people dislike this comment? I thought it was funny lol
Star928 7
The human centipide? Oh god why
saraaa2552 15
Arachnophobia maybe? Haha
Unibear 1
Well...he tried, right?
UberNova 18
We are in 2012 now, why did he not just order it online, when the package came (unless he ordered something else) he would know the film was in there (but would have packaging on it) no need to even see it; so, he could have tried harder, or thought about it more.
chellyX92 8
71, you have to look at it while you are ordering it. Plus its cheaper to just buy it in the store. You dot have to pay for shipping and handling.
UberNova 18
81- I don't know how it is for others outside of the UK, but when GAME delivers a game, the delivery is free. Besides, if you get scared over a digital picture of a spider, then that is pathetic.
Tezoma 28
92, you think being afraid of a digital image of a spider is pathetic? The fact that he's afraid of a box is more sad to me.
Snowlight_fml 7
"Severely arachnaphobic" Kinda hints at the fact that the very image of a spider will send him into a panic attack.
TylerBurden 21
He should have bought you something else. Maybe something both of you can enjoy.
xNephilim 19
Studded condoms don't work. The studs are too small and a female can (in most cases) hardly or even don't feel any difference at all.
Roevera 14
That escalated quickly..
mubaki 18
I'm confused by this FML...
TheRoomFan 8
Perhaps he should have given you a present that he wasn't deathly afraid of...
mubaki 18
No movie is more terrifying than the room
TheRoomFan 8
D:
GreenJerusha 2
The room? I love horror movies but. Ever heard of that one. Z
Grimmerie 31
Nothing is scarier than the acting in The Room.
TheRoomFan 8
But a movie about spiders is certainly scarier. Which would you rather find under your bed, a big hairy spider or Tommy Wiseau?
FalconWhitaker 20
Spiders any day. The mental image of Tommy Wiseau appearing from under my bed and saying "How's your sex life, huuuuuuuh?" is far more hideous than any arachnid.
Epsilonyx 15
I DID NOT HIT HER IT'S NOT TRUE DAS BULLSHET oh hi mark
SqueakyChipmunk 22
71) Nothing is scarier than the acting in Twilight.
Posthuman 26
YOU ARE TEARING ME APART LISA!!!
Syndromia 15
108, clearly you've never seen The Room. It's so bad it makes Twilight look like a cinematic masterpiece. The dialogue is terrible, the music is terrible, the plot is terrible, it's all just awful. It was filmed in order and you can see the female lead gaining weight over the fact that she's starring in the worst movie ever made and that it's just this side of soft core ****. One actor just up and quit mid movie and they brought in a new character to say the rest of his lines and never explain who the new dude is. It has about a billion subplots that are mentioned once and then are never mentioned again, like how Lisa's mother (Lisa is the main female character) was diagnosed with breast cancer. You'd think that would be something that would come up at least once or twice during the rest of the movie but no, you never hear a word about it again.
OldMemoriesFade 8
It could be worse, at least he did try, and tried again.
Demonfish 14
I suppose it's your favourite movie because you enjoy watching your husband squirm at the sight of it, isn't it OP :P
ManInTheMachine 20
What movie was it? Charelotte's Web?
melij99 5
Hheeyyy!! Good one :D
ICastillo 25
Charlotte would see Op's boyfriend and right "Puss" on her web.
nado13579 12
It was Never Say Never.
ICastillo 25
Ahhh!! Did you say it was Never Say Never!!! Quick burn it with fire before it moves!!!!
Mauskau 36
Spiderman. Or spiderpig.
mvc3ftw 17
it was eight legged freaks
bigwiensch 15
the human centipede
struran 8
Honolulu crunch Christ
Pleonasm 36
His spidey senses were tingling