Today, my girlfriend decided that we won't be having any more sex until I beat her ridiculously high score on Flappy Bird. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was playing an intense game of Flappy Bird. I was so excited at being about to beat my high score that I got a hard-on. FML
Today, my girlfriend likes playing games on her phone more than she likes me. FML
Today, my girlfriend won't have sex with me. Why? Because my Mii knocked out her Mii in Wii boxing. It wouldn't be as bad if she wasn't in one-player mode. FML
Today, my girlfriend beat me at ping pong, twenty to three. She said I let her win because I don't respect her, then stormed out of the room. I'm just really bad at ping pong. FML
Today, my girlfriend kindly broke the news to me that she doesn't want to take part in any sexual activity anymore because it's getting too boring. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after I beat her once again in a trivia game. She said that I was cheating, and if I was cheating on the game, I was definitely cheating on her as well. FML
Today, my girlfriend planned our day, she wanted to play FIFA before having sex. I won 11-0. She stormed out of the room, went home and isn't picking my calls / texting back. It's been 12 hours. FML
Today, while playing a game, my girlfriend told a bunch of our friends that she's never had an orgasm. News to me. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she started moaning and breathing heavily. I thought she was getting hot and was about to cum. Unfortunetly, she soon said, "I'm bored, let's play a board game." She was sighing, not moaning. FML
Today, after weeks of being addicted to Bejeweled Blitz, I couldn't stop thinking about it while having sex with my girlfriend. FML
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Top comments
flee2321 10
I would leave.
kjoule 5
Get or flapping or else you will be left to fapping...
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Comments (139)
fantasyworld 39
Delete the app, she can't get it back.
Comoke1024 19
You say "Okay" and rub 'em out for a while. As Bill Burr says, doing so is"the champagne of victory." She'll either forget or give in and have sex, or she won't. If she won't because of a phone app, dump her. If she does this sort of thing, she's going to do worse things to you the longer you stay with her.
thebosnian 11
You better get to flappin then.
Atromus 13
Delete the app
Tyrax 16
Unless she was kidding, probably easier to simply find a more mature lady.
RichardPencil 32
Sounds like you'll be playing a lot of Fappy Bird now.