Today, my girlfriend caught me using my T-shirt as a tissue. Again. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my girlfriend caught me picking my nose and eating the booger. FML
Multiusage
Today, I noticed my girlfriend wiping her sweaty armpits with the small towel that I always use to wipe my face with after shaving. Now I know why the towel smells so bad. FML
Today, as soon as I got home, my girlfriend was waiting for me at the door. She told me she was breaking up with me. The reason? She found a girl's shirt in my closet and that she didn't need a cheating boyfriend. That shirt was mine. FML
Today, I was drying myself with a towel after a shower when I noticed a bad smell. After running out of toilet paper last night, one of my friends decided to use my clean towel to wipe herself instead. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got into an argument while she was in the bathroom. I told her I was leaving her because she's too needy. She came out of the bathroom and threw her used tampon at me. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided to break up with me because she found a bra in my cupboard. It was hers. FML
Mix up
Today, I have a bad cold, so I've been carrying tissues around with me. I noticed our puppy had pooped on the floor, so I grabbed a napkin and cleaned it up, then threw it away. I then blew my nose with my tissue. Apparently, I threw away my tissue and used the napkin. FML
Today, I pulled a white cloth with string on the end from my dog's mouth. I then realized I was holding my sister's used tampon. FML
Today, my sister confessed that when she runs out of clean underwear, she uses mine. That wouldn't be so bad if she didn't also put it back in my dresser afterwards so I wouldn't notice. FML
Top comments
snowgr5 6
Pro Tip: Most guys just use their socks for that.
Jackey 29
Why did the sperm cross the road? You put on the wrong t-shirt.
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Comments (7)
RichardPencil 32
That snot sexy.
snowgr5 6
Pro Tip: Most guys just use their socks for that.
Jackey 29
Why did the sperm cross the road? You put on the wrong t-shirt.
BurnInDemonFire 39
How gross are you that you still wear the same t-shirt after smearing whatever bodily fluid you expelled onto it after the fact? "No tissues, but I really have to sneeze. Guess I'll have to use my t-shirt. It may be 9:00am, but it won't hurt until I get home in about 12 hours. Hope no one notices when I go out for drinks after work."
Madison Gliosci 16
Ya nasty
simcityguy09 19
Who cares if you wiped your snot on your shirt collar?