Today, I was drying myself with a towel after a shower when I noticed a bad smell. After running out of toilet paper last night, one of my friends decided to use my clean towel to wipe herself instead. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my new roommate moved in. It seems that instead of using toilet paper like a normal human being, she instead opts to use the nearest towel in reach. I found this out when I went to dry off with mine after a shower. FML
Today, after I took a shower, I was wiping my face with the towel I share with my sister. It smelled peculiar, so I took my face away and looked at it. Turns out, I was wiping my face on a huge shit stain. FML
Today, I was drying off with a towel after coming in from outside. I noticed that the bathroom smelled like cat pee, so I sniffed all around to find out where my cat peed. Turns out, he peed on the towel that I was drying myself off with. FML
Today, I noticed my girlfriend wiping her sweaty armpits with the small towel that I always use to wipe my face with after shaving. Now I know why the towel smells so bad. FML
Today, I'm on a class trip to Washington DC. Last night, my roommate took a shower, and I decided that I would take one in the morning. This morning, I found out after I got out of the shower that my roommate used one towel for drying himself, and the other for a mat. He didn't hang either of them up. FML
Today, I used the public restroom at a park. After washing my hands, I went to dry them, only to realize there were no paper towels. I thought the air dryer would work, but it broke halfway through, leaving me standing there, awkwardly fanning my hands with my arms spread wide. A group of teenagers walked in and started laughing at me. FML
Today, I was taking a dump at a public restroom. As I reached over to grab the toilet paper, I realized someone had peed on it. FML
Today, I was hanging out with some friends, and I had to take a dump. After I was done, I realized there was no more toilet paper, so I asked my friends to get me some. They threw in duct tape, sandpaper, and saran wrap, and told me to make a decision. FML
Today, I wrapped a towel around my waist so I could take a dump while using my laptop. I sat on the toilet seat and let a big load go. Turns out I forgot to unwrap the towel. FML
Today, I grabbed a fresh hand towel from the drawer in the bathroom. I wiped my hands and noticed they smelled like shit. My 6-year-old had wiped poo from his finger onto the dark grey towels. I guess he sometimes helps the poo out. Good to know. FML
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Top comments
leogachi 15
Who the hell would use someone's clean towel for that?
Pleonasm 36
I know, right? What an asswipe.
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Comments (65)
leogachi 15
Who the hell would use someone's clean towel for that?
Pleonasm 36
I know, right? What an asswipe.
JMichael 26
I actually had an incident close to this with my ex roommates. They didn't wipe their ass, but used my brand new towels to clean up a beer mess they had made while throwing a party when I was gone for vacation. Needless to say I moved out. Some people are just inconsiderate asswipes.
laden_swallow09 35
And then put the towel back as if nothing happened?! No, that's not desperate. That's just being thoughtless and a real shitstain of a person.
captainsmegma 12
Well, me for one.
beeriah17 14
Lol #13!!!!!!!!!
Vickky_fml 3
Seriously right?? Had the same kinda shitty experience.
cebsvt 14
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Well that's shitty.
VonBlitzkrieg 27
satisfied?
1dvs_bstd 41
Prepare for the downvotes, my kind sir. People on fml are unrelentlessly unforgiving... especially when it comes to cliche puns.
Sandsh8rk 36
Please stop.
sstahpp 33
Not today, Satan. Not today!
adamg214 7
Is everyone getting downvoted?
PePziNL 20
You get a downvote. And you get a downvote. EVERYBODY GETS A DOWNVOTE!!!
BecauseIAmBatman_fml 22
Except for you, 46
rieebee 23
Guess it's time for another shower.
PotatoeNumberOne 8
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Those people that keep recycling overused puns are coming...smh
VonBlitzkrieg 27
What the **** is wrong with people?
Eyalsh 32
right? i mean who does shit like that?! ..sorry, i'll show myself out
mexican_music 13
That's what friends are for
Sotanostash 20
At least you didn't have to walk long in order to shower afterwards? But seriously, that's not okay. You have weird friends
Jenniesaurus 14
Aaaaaand back in the shower!
Pleonasm 36
So is she up Shit Crack, I mean Creek?
psyjoniz 12
*brace for incoming 'shitty' jokes*