Today, my girlfriend asked me, "Is it in yet?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Well?
Today, I heard the four most dreaded words known to man during my first time: "Is it in yet?" It was. FML
Get on with it
Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, she suddenly said : "Are you going to be done any time soon?" FML
Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend asked me, "Are you sure you're a guy?" I still have no idea what that was for. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend if she has ever had an affair. She replied, "Yes. With you". FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years texted me saying "I can't wait to f*ck later." I replied saying, "Couldn't we just spend time together?" Her response was, "What are you, a girl?" FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend what her favorite quality about me was. Her answer, "Your car." FML
Love language
Today, trying to be an old-school romantic, I asked my girlfriend, "Where art thou, my love?" via SMS. She replied, "Toilet." FML
Today, while I was at my boyfriend's house, I got my period. About an hour after I told him, he impatiently said, "Is it over yet?" FML
Romance is dead
Today, my girlfriend and I haven't had sex for a long time, so when she got out of the shower I was ready on our bed to finally do it. Her response? "Really? Now? I just got out of the shower." FML
Top comments
Ilovelife07 0
shoulda taken it out, and put it in her butt and said "feel it now??"
Newbie21 1
well is it? lol
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Comments (170)
Goople 0
asians do not have small dicks! Women just have HUGE holes!
iSwag 0
posted twice my bad...app froze
KatherineAnne 7
I don't forgive you...
PurpleKuSh_fml 0
sry that you have a small penis
newmanlyman3 8
was it? how is that bad
floydman 1
so if you go down on her, and you say something, how many times does it echo?
dcice13 0
haha throwing a hotdog down a hallway lol
DirtyDiana_fml 0
Fyi you dumbasses no one in the world can control the size of their dick! if they could people would have 16 inch cocks! I don't know why i'm replying to you trolls, you're all prolly a bunch of virgins anyways, wanting to talk crap.
Angi95 3
What's wrong with being a virgin?
extreemguy19 7
The point is, how do any of them know what the hell ******* feels like if they have never experienced it? God, stupid ginger anti-trolls end up trolling themselves.
MDNL 0
haha tiny dick
Cruth 2
#26 how do u know?
Cruth 2
i mean #27