Today, my girlfriend and I were watching TV. She starts to undo my belt buckle, unzips my fly and then takes my pants off. Right as I'm starting to get really excited, she says to me, "Just joking." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Bad sign
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she starts laughing and says, "Wow, this is just too funny." FML
Today, my fiancé and I were cuddling on the couch watching TV when we started kissing. As I crawled onto his lap and started to unzip his pants, he said, "You're blocking the TV." FML
Today, my boyfriend came before I'd even unbuttoned my pants. FML
Today, my girlfriend asked me to take my belt off as the buckle was hurting her leg. I didn't have a belt on. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were in bed. She slipped her hand under the duvet, and I got all excited thinking she was going to give me a hand job. She was actually pulling out her wedgie. FML
Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided to perform a strip tease for me. As he was stripping out of his clothes, he took his shirt and then pants off first. He was wearing zebra striped knee high socks and underwear. I burst out laughing. He left. FML
Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my cock over my jeans and said, "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML
Protip
Today, I went to my room to find my girlfriend on the floor, butt up, with her pants down. I elatedly took the invitation and dropped my pants too, only for her to tell me, "Not so fast champ, I'm trying to force some farts out." FML
Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML
Top comments
TidusBlade 0
Ouch that must have sucked, be sure to pull the same prank on her whenever you get the chance ;P
heathcoate 0
Hahahahaha. Tricked your dick.
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Comments (319)
nodbor 11
So all you girls think it is funny, right. Alright men and of course, some of you women , lets see how funny it is when we refuse sex with our other half. Your all with me on this, right? Onward, where did everyone go?
deliciouskaek 1
Some of the commenters need to calm the hell down. Don't know if she deserves all the 'bitch' comments, though. Having a bit of fun does not a bitch create. That said, that /was/ pretty uncool.
chinookwarrior 0
Just have sex with her, pretend to climax and at the same time say," im not wearing a condom!" then pull out, pull off the condom, toss it on her belly and say,"just kidding!" You have to be super sneaky in putting on the condom so she doesnt see you do it and just assumes you did. You dont even have to pretend to climax if you want to give that condom you throw on her stomach a special touch.
kon_man 0
ouch, that sucks
ditlihi 0
Dump her. Some things should never be joked about and this will only get worse.
adhar23 0
haha people need to chill the **** out. Teasing is such a big turn on. Cause then when it does happen after, its ******* fantastic. And everyone whose sayin shes a bitch, get a life. im a guy btw.
ShamCross 0
Hilarious!!! The rest of you guys should learn a little self control and not get quite so worked up.
DankJemo 0
Worst ******* joke EVER! Teasing is good, but that isn't teasing at all, that is just being cruel.
drawne 0
Win.
Licky_Licky 0
She's a keeper! Win.