Today, my four year old told my mother-in-law that our house is haunted because she hears a ghost at night saying "oh" and daddy's name as if they're hurt. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 10-year-old son told my 5-year-old daughter that we're a ghost family, and told her to run through our glass door to see for herself. She believed it, ran straight into the door, and ended up having to be taken to hospital. FML
Today, I found out that my 4-year-old son is truly convinced that I am a ghost. He also thinks that I died from burning, "because of your face". FML
Today, my little sister asked what the noises were last night. It happened to be my dad and his girlfriend fooling around. I ended up telling her it was ghosts. Now I'm grounded by my dad who yelled at me for scaring her. I was trying to save his ass from a lot of questions. FML
Today, I was awoken by a conversation my mom was having with my dog upstairs. She was telling my dog that a ghost lives in our house. She was completely serious. The ghost even has a name and a backstory. FML
Today, my parents watched a horror movie with some creepy child in it. Apparently, I sound just like that kid when I call for my mom, so now she doesn't want me to call her mom anymore. FML
Today, my coworker said that she suddenly got the shivers. I jokingly told her that it meant she must be being watched by a dead person and made stupid ghost noises. She then told me it was the anniversary of her dad's death and burst into tears. FML
Today, my girlfriend thinks my house is filled with ghosts. She can only hear them when I fart. FML
Today, my two year old girl said "motherfucker". Everyone laughed, even her grandparents. Our family is insane. FML
Today, my four-year-old daughter called me by her mom's new boyfriend's name. Three different times. FML
Today, I heard my mom moan in the other room. FML
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Top comments
sourgirl101 29
Grandma: "Honey, there's no such things as ghosts. That's just mommy getting laid" ^Now there's an FML ;)
Jessi_the_sexii 0
lol ydi for being a screamer
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Comments (164)
Sebs005 0
first
moofin123456 0
ahah That's hilarious
MaxSnacks 0
Well, when a mommy and a daddy love each other very much.... They ****.
Sharpie23 7
haha maybe you should look into bondage where they put duct tape over your mouth or something
MissRaiin 0
kids always say funny stuff...I love it
MnBran6 0
That's a classic
PizzaGuy11 0
oh joy...
Arsonnist 3
Maybe he is hurt. Do you get rough? That would be even more traumatizing.
hahoon11 0
haha go with it and make the kid believe the house is actually haunted and that if he tells anyone else the ghost will come for him next
420pium 0
who u gonna call
skroal 7
YDI for your four year old telling your mother-in-law that your house is haunted because she hears a ghost at night saying "oh" and daddy's name as if they're hurt.
bunny911 16
#30, meow!
fisheatsbear 6
Damn you #27 you got that song stuck in my head.
treyroxx 0
GHOST BUSTERS
luckymay 0
ahaha that's gold ! :)
skroal 7
32 - LOL
smileanyway 0
Don't enjoy 'haunting the house' so much and just keep it down when you are and you wouldn't have this problem ;)
arcticcatman007 0
ghostbusters!!!
pnutbutterandkel_fml 0
hahahahahahahahahahaha!
Brittney_E 0
well someones satisfied...?
dont_be_that_guy_fml 0
skroal congrats! No one is bagging on you this time. unless I didn't read far enough!
sillyollie 0
ahahah nice orphan reference.
HeroOfMi 0
i'm waiting for people to realize skroal only does what he does to get a reaction...
onelove222 0
**** you skroal! I hope your soul,spirit and corpse burn in hell : )
SacOmonkeyNuts 0
skroal has bieber hair....FAG
soul_fml 0
WIN
JayColt 0
41 - GAY
Mumbellosity711 0
response: see son, you live in a place that is called a "whorehouse" and this happens to every kid at some time in their lives...
DuDMadness 0
I just a Boner...
emiley0413 0
ghost busters!!!! :p who u gonna call GHOST BUSTERS!!!
swimmerstud 7
97- about 6 people hve already said tht. tht kid is soooo funny!
BallinJ 0
u should let the 4 yr old watch and see wat is really going on
Hazelfbabyyy 0
This kind of made me horny.
zanguard 0
Well atleast the ghost is saying daddy's name and not grandpa's
Sniper3000 0
#30 you repeated the fml about the 24 year old girlfriend as well wtf.
dridri97 0
11 is dat from the movie orphan??!!!!
rockediny 0
111 me too! I say we do something about it....masturbation :D
usmc2016 0
pwned
RainbowBitch15 11
agreed 16. OP, your kid is awesome.
SSJVegeta 0
Who you gonna call? Ghost Nappa!
thetweak70 2
11 - lmao
hijueputa 0
^^ damn, and you are a ******* nickel!
kool_me 0
jeez 72 show ur face in ur pic if ur gonna have one!
sexybeastsexybea 0
kids say the darndest things? *nervous laugh*
jmtafoya22 2
Haha. That sucks. But it's still pretty funny
zadie 6
shoot now I got that song in my head... ugh thanks a lot. :)
naida123 0
Ur hott
naida123 0
Your hot
threer 30
#27, JOHN EGBERT!
campbellshayla73 0
rly ackward I bet
DarkHelmet 10
hahahaha way to go Dad!!!! putting down the pipe
ALindsey 0
I feel like this is from the same person that let their four year old watch **** haha
TheNinjaCat 10
*awkward :)
Jessi_the_sexii 0
lol ydi for being a screamer
kaijapapaya 0
Comprehension fail.
kaijapapaya 0
Oh nevermind...I guess it doesn't really specify if OP is the mom or dad. Dang, I just blew my chance at being a Nazi! :)
Jessi_the_sexii 0
OP is clearly a woman, "and daddys name" either OP is a gay man with an adopted child or you sir cannot read
beeboyaxl 2
screamer! I feel sorry for your 4 year old..
awsomechick212 0
omfg! that's so freakin funny
zaqqcham 0
I just saw a video on youtube similar to this
validus 0
French condom commercial? "maman a dit que je peux!"
aekkoukla 0
#76 c'est tres amusante!
ALlamaOnFire 20
Well, sorry to be a French grammar nazi, if the commenter above me wanted to say 'it was' (past) it should be c'était, not c'est (present). But if you did want to say 'it is', ignore me 8D
mistired 0
ry
chevyguy85 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
shouldnt your mother in law be telling your daughter to stay in the kitchen
remy3106 10
**** u jerk off
LightningLadyy 0
Thank you, 103.
PLAT1NUMsilk 0
LOL sexy ghost.
Jessicaa96145 0
aha. that's actually cute, have fun telling that to her when your older
Raleigh_bruh 7
Aha, freaks. :]
MaxSnacks 0
Yeah? Well you're freakier... I went there.
sweetdreams20 0
what?
Raleigh_bruh 7
Blah, my comment didn't post. Anywho, my freakiness is virtually nonexistent. :p
Chrisskiies 0
That's blasphemy Raleigh!! It completly shows it's existance! lol