Today, my 10-year-old son told my 5-year-old daughter that we're a ghost family, and told her to run through our glass door to see for herself. She believed it, ran straight into the door, and ended up having to be taken to hospital. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I decided to scare my 10 year old sister for fun. I hid behind a door and leapt out, shouting "Boo!" when she walked by. She burst into tears and ran screaming to my mom. My mom thought I'd hit my sister, and was so angry that she punched me in the eye. FML
Today, I found out that my 4-year-old son is truly convinced that I am a ghost. He also thinks that I died from burning, "because of your face". FML
Supernatural
Today, I was heading to the bathroom when I clearly saw a little boy walking into my bedroom. My wife and I live alone, and I screamed at the top of my lungs, thinking he was a ghost. Turns out my wife collected him from school for a friend, and I just didn't hear them arrive. FML
Sussy Baka
Today, my son broke his arm roughhousing with his brother on a bunk bed. While at the ER, he thought it would be funny to tell a different story to each doctor and nurse, forcing me to speak over him. They found this behavior "suspicious" and reported us to child services. FML
Walk, don't run
Today, whilst babysitting, I broke a glass. I explained to the kid that it was very important not to walk barefoot around where it had happened, because of the tiny bits of glass. He jumped back, scared, and while doing so tripped. I rushed to help him and ran through the broken glass. Barefoot. FML
Today, I'm sitting in the ER with my eight-year-old son. He broke his arm after jumping out through the second story window. He was too impatient to walk to the ice cream van pulling up outside. FML
Open door policy
Today, while we were exploring a building, my dad and I somehow got separated. After about 30 seconds, I found him on the other side of a door, so I went to go through what I thought was a door. Instead, I smashed my head on a windowpane and collapsed to the floor in pain in front of 5 people. FML
Today, my teenage son taught my five-year-old daughter how to fake her own death. I walked into the kitchen today to find her lying still on the floor, covered in ketchup. She laughed when I began to scream. FML
Today, I went upstairs to scold my boys for running in the house because someone could get hurt. As I turned around to come back downstairs I tripped and fell all the way down to the landing at the bottom. I could hear them laughing in their rooms. FML
Today, my daughter was acting strange. When she wasn’t muttering in some strange language, she was talking about invisible people coming to get me. Terrified, I called my boyfriend. Turns out he taught her that as a prank. He knows I’m afraid of anything supernatural. FML
Top comments
JoeGrant 12
More like **** her life...I mean for god sake she ran into a glass door!
KBurns207 17
Lol good old fashioned brotherly love. And at only 10 years old the escapades have only just begun. That's funny but I hope your daughter is ok!
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Comments (123)
JoeGrant 12
More like **** her life...I mean for god sake she ran into a glass door!
then000bster 16
Well at least OP only mentions two kids. Hopefully they can solve their differences down the road.
Damned_Architect 25
I hope your daughter is ok, OP. Running through a glass door is scary and can be life-threatening. In High School, a friend ran his hand through a plate glass door; it needed an ambulance, 75+ stitches and months of therapy. On the other hand, I ran my hand through a French door when I was 6; I still have the scars but am otherwise totally ok.
nurchok 15
OP, hope your daughter is OK. She is not related to David Copperfield by any chance, is she? :)
R5luver 5
I hope she's okay, OP
generalasskicker 12
Lol before I read the ending I was fina say I fell through a sliding glass door shoulder first and I came out fine.
KBurns207 17
Lol good old fashioned brotherly love. And at only 10 years old the escapades have only just begun. That's funny but I hope your daughter is ok!
patrickalamo 48
Now it is time for sweet revenge. Help your daughter out.
Mopmob02 18
If I were op, said revenge would be the WORST possible thing I can think of. What was that, you want to cookies? Didn't you know, ghost don't eat cookies. Juice? Ghost can't drink juice, they can only drink water. Oh, you want to play you're Nintendo DS I'm sorry you're a ghost, ghost can't pick stuff like that up.
summerguy97 16
I think he got the idea from this new show on Nickelodeon with a ghost family living with a living family.
Wakachulak 22
Nickelodeon? Should have known, that channel is retarded.
awkward_panda 8
aww that's so mean
nurchok 15
And kinda sweet in its own way at the same time...
caitlinrawrr 9
#78, how the **** is that sweet?
greeneyebeauty9 28
I think he was just contradicting the obvious by being sarcastic.
blowtrees420 6
ouch
NoMore_CoolNames 14
Oh no, it's the most pleasurable thing you can do.
SaxophoneHero 12
This reminds me of that Harry Potter where he ran into a brick wall at the train station. When will they ever learn?
rapunzel3416 28
This actually reminds me of the movie The Others. It's pretty interesting. I haven't seen it in about 8 years but it's pretty good from what I remember. If you haven't seen it and are bored you should watch it.
ryanthecheeseguy 18
Your son is one clever asshole.
PterodactylMan 23
Your son is a troll
alfakennybody 10
Is your daughter ok?
Callmesam 10
Wow your son is an ass. I'd be cleaning out his room of anything he loved until she was 100% healed and THEN start letting him earn it all back.
Pandacupcakelove 26
#33 I see what you're saying, but you can't really call it an accident. The older kid is 10 years old, he knows better. Though I agree that he probably didn't mean for her to get hurt that bad, he knew what he was doing and that it wasn't right and could be very dangerous.
TheJordanBryant 11
#66 "Could be?"
PinkieKeen 20
It's a glass door...wouldn't it shatter into pieces if she RAN into it?
LifeOfAnRN 18
Oops, I accidentally gave #66 a thumbs down. No matter what he thought would happen he was being a brat.
Ins0mau 20
77 - Not necessarily. Glass sheets can be stronger than you think and she was only a little 5 year old after all.
rogwest 23
Just think that's the sperm that one... Just saying....
brookieh 12
*won
Uramonkey 11
He's a little shit, not an idiot... Just saying...
CallMeMcFeelii 14
He's pretty damn smart. That's definitely an ingenious prank to pull. I wouldn't have thought that up at 10 years old.
Wowxoxo 17
If you're subtly trying to indicate that the son obtained his genes from his father then you need to go back to biology class... The sperm always wins whether it's a boy or a girl. The Y chromosome from the sperm did come from the father however every offspring is 50% from both parents
ImAFaker 29
Every single person alive is the sperm that won. Get over it.
TheJordanBryant 11
#63 Best comment I have read all night! lmao
SolarFlare 20
im sure that sperm cheated.
p00p0nt0ast 10
No, it would be one. Not won as in winning, one as in a singular thing.