Today, my dad woke me up for the second time to get me ready for school. Wanting me to prove I was really awake, he made me sit up. As soon as he left my room, I dozed off and faceplanted my nightstand. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. Groggy and disoriented, I bumped into several pieces of furniture and made a lot of noise. My dad woke up, mistook me for a burglar, and knocked me out with his fist. FML
Today, I blacked out while hugging my dad. I woke up a minute later on the floor with my dad telling me to, "quit being lazy and get up." FML
Today, I was awoken by my dad yelling into my ear. In shock, I jumped up off the couch, and came smashing down into the coffee table. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, I got up to go get some water. When I came back, I was going to flop onto my bed, but I faceplanted into my floor. I'd forgotten that I'd rearranged my room and moved my bed. FML
Today, I stood up too quickly and got dizzy, so I sat on the edge of the bed to regain my balance. I started dozing off to sleep again, got confused, and peed down the side of my bed thinking I was on the toilet. FML
Today, my back hurt really badly, so I decided to stay in bed. After a while, I sat up to shut the door. When I leaned over to reach it, I fell off my bed and face-planted the floor. After picking myself up and getting comfortable in my bed again, I realized the door was still open. FML
Today, after getting home from a twelve-hour shift at work, I got into bed and passed out. My mother soon woke me up, screaming that she could tell I was "fake sleeping" and ignoring her lecture on how I need to stop being so "lazy". FML
Today, my dad set the smoke alarm off at 6 a.m. as a "practice drill." I was woken up so suddenly, I fell out of bed into the bucket of sick I had been throwing up into the night before due to flu. Dad yelled at me for not getting out of the house in time. FML
Today, I fell asleep after finishing my exam. I had a dream I was falling and woke up smashing my face on the desk. Everyone laughed. FML
Today, after making fun of my dad for years because he falls asleep in front of the TV every night by 9:30, I sat down “just for a minute” after work and woke up at 2 a.m. fully dressed, lights on, with Netflix asking if I was still watching, and a half-eaten wrap stuck to my chest. FML
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Top comments
GaryMuzz 4
how about you man up and wake up on your own?
Tuesdays76 0
Well GOOD MORNING! Why drink coffee when you can get smacked in the face with a Night Stand?
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Comments (169)
TeaLover_fml 0
Sucks for you! I'm on spring break.
natysogy 2
lol
calley123 0
me too! woo hoo!
mk58 31
That's what I was thinking...
Charmest_fml 0
maybe the kid had an alarm clock but his dad got so annoyed by him not shutting it off that he went and woke him up himself. i know i have to do that with my 17 year old son. so give the guy a break. geez
iSitt 0
what was op doing all night?
JenL_fml 7
I don't blame you, OP. It's Monday... -.-
vampire_rising 0
so fail
maddiester 5
I have an alarm, sometimes I dismiss it and fall back asleep and my mom comes afterwards to wake me up. There's nothing wrong with your parents waking you up guys, so stop attacking OP. I don't even think that has to do with OP hitting him/herself.
Togii 3
What are you going to do when you dismiss the alarm and fall back asleep, when you no longer live at home for your parents to be the adults and wake you? Miss work once a week because you sleep in every Monday? Start being a responsible adult now.
IceCweaaam 0
you really wanna know?...
TheWorldGreatest 8
why should it be your parents job to wake your sorry ass up for school?
SydneyAustralia2 0
Jeez ; some people can't wake up to an alarm . Ever think bout that one , ? ! ;D
emo0366 0
next time make sure that there is a pillow there
TheVertigoCame 0
Yeah, because OP's definitely going to think about a pillow if they can barely stay awake...