Today, my dad seemed moody, so to lift his spirits, I told him I loved him. He just snorted, "You gay or something, boy?" Really mature, dad, really mature. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad told me he liked men. While he was making a drunken speech. At my wedding. FML
Today, my dad texted me, "I love u." I replied, "I love you too dad... are you drunk?" He answers back, "Of course I am..." My dad only tells me he loves me when he's drunk. FML
Today, I came home to find my dad drinking. Trying to be cheerful, I greeted him with a "Hi, dad!" He sighed, shook his head, and said "It hurts me when you call me that." FML
Today, I thought it'd be funny to sneak up behind my dad and yell "BOO!" to scare him. He didn't even flinch. All he did was calmly look over his shoulder and sigh, "Oh for fuck's sake. And you wonder why I don't love you." FML
Today, I found my dad drunk, sitting on the bathroom floor crying. When I asked him why, he said, "My son is gay." I'm his only child, and I'm a girl. FML
Today, my dad came home drunk and called me hot. FML
Today, I asked my dad if he'd like to see the photos of my wedding, which he didn't bother to come to. Reply: "What the fuck, are you gay or something? Keep that homo stuff to yourself." My wife started laughing so hard she was crying. FML
Today, I let my step-father know exactly what I thought of him. After a few moments of awkward silence, he leaned towards me and quietly whispered, "Well you're adopted. Your parents never loved you." FML
Today, my father lectured me on the “sanctity of marriage” while his third wife bawled in the corner. I'm just gay, not a raging cunt. FML
Today, I jokingly mocked my dad about his age. He jokingly poured milk all over my head. FML
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Top comments
KingLewisII 34
No humor like dad humor
VonBlitzkrieg 27
If he thinks it's gay for a son to love his father, he either had a bad childhood or he's got some backwards-ass way of thinking.
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Comments (67)
ladybugz23 13
you should of say yes I'm gay. see what's his reactions lol
The_Phoenix1 6
My dad does the same thing, and im a girl. Some dads are too proud to say that back...its weird.
beckshniddley 10
Wow. Son can't say he loves his dad and is seen as "gay" if he does. What a ****** up world.
at0micmin3r 23
Cain't fault old folks fo' they ways, son.
Thebrassmonkey 0
Unless you were adopted the day before, you should already know that your dad is not the kind of guy who will be cheered by his son saying 'I love you'. If you wanted to help, some beer or a trip to a titty bar would be more useful.
Soarinthegayone 6
Why yes I am
pinkstardust 9
Great dad ya got there
Kotine 11
I don't tell my dad I love him because he randomly texts me and calls me gay and a fag a lot (I'm not gay btw)