Today, my contact split completely in half at a wedding. Not only did I interrupt the vows with my scream of pain, but I was only able to fish out half of it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my contact ripped in half in my eye. One half fell out, but the other half got stuck too far under my eyelid. An hour and $100 later, Urgent Care finally got it. FML
Today, at my wedding, when my husband heard, "You may now kiss the bride!" he swung me down romantically and was about to plant one on me when his arm slipped, causing me to fall on the floor hitting my head, and getting a concussion. FML
Today, I was at work, eating coleslaw of all things, and my tooth broke in half. Diagonally. The bottom half fell out into my coleslaw. FML
Today, I blacked out at a wedding as a bridesmaid, during the service. FML
Today, at my mom's wedding, I tripped as I was walking down the aisle. I was holding the train of her dress. It ripped. FML
Today, I accidentally super-glued my hand to my face while trying to fix a broken pair of glasses. I yanked it off in a panic, taking a patch of my face along with it. FML
Today, I was helping my boyfriend in the garden. When I wanted to break a piece of wood, I lost my balance. Head first against a stone. Result: five stitches in my upper lip, and a loose tooth. FML
Today, I went to my cousin’s wedding and started tearing up during the vows. I reached into my purse for a tissue but accidentally pulled out a tampon, which flew across the aisle and landed right between the bride and groom. It's probably going to make it into the wedding video. FML
Today, I was at my best friend's wedding. As she threw the bouquet, I was punched in the face by another bridesmaid. Later, as I was explaining what had happened, I punched myself in the face. FML
Today, my recently married friend took off her wedding ring to make bread. Being single and pathetic, I tried it on to see what it would look like. It got stuck on my finger. The ER doctor had to cut it off. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
MannyWasHere 12
At least it happened during the vows and not during the “if anyone imposes on this holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace”
engineerosaurus 26
OP didn’t say it was their wedding.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (15)
interesting33 37
that sucks, but you are married, that is amazing!
engineerosaurus 26
OP didn’t say it was their wedding.
Burle 17
Don't think the wedding was hers, says "at a wedding" not "at my wedding"
interesting33 37
good point!
alainopotato 20
Wow! First your period, now this! It may have been the happiest day of your life, but certainly not the luckiest.
real life problems 26
I've had my contacts tear and split in half before and it didnt hurt. I'm not sure why it hurt you, especially that much.
RichardPencil 32
That’s gonna make it hard to catch the bouquet. Of course, nobody’s rooting for the woman who grabbed the spotlight during the high point of the ceremony.
MannyWasHere 12
At least it happened during the vows and not during the “if anyone imposes on this holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace”
RichardPencil 32
Wait!?!? Isn’t it “hold your piece?” That’s what I’ve been thinking all these years, wondering what piece we should hold.
hfnsjsnsjzns 18
oh god that certainly hurt
real life problems 26
How?
1gullible_bugger 34
and this is exactly why I wear glasses. All the time.
Lunar Spice 16
Hey guys, OP here. First of all, no, it was not my wedding. No, I did not have my period like some of you are thinking. Some background information, I use Dailies, which are naturally thin (you're supposed to wear them for two days at the most). My eyes get irritated easily, so I was lightly rubbing them, trying to ease the itchiness. I went to the eye doctor the next day (this happened a month ago-ish) to see if he could take the other half out. He couldn't find it, but over a couple days, the discomfort slowly disappeared. I think it just fell out while I was asleep. Yes, it hurt a lot. Yes, I'm still wearing contacts. And yes, the bride was concerned and forgave me. I caught her bouquet at the reception.
Silverion Sairee 14
glad you're ok and that the other half of the contact probably worked it's way out during sleep. btw the 'period at wedding' that people have commented on, is probably referencing the other fml where the bride got her's a week early and it stained her dress. in fml' comments if a couple fml's have similarities ppl tend to joke it's happening to the same person.
ChromoTec 24
That once happened to me in the morning, and I didn't get the other half out until 7th period choir at school