Today, my dad screamed at me, called me a monster, told me he wanted me to move out, and that I better start looking for an apartment. Why? I slammed the microwave door. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my dad got so drunk that he had an intense argument with the microwave, resulting in him threatening to ground me after I tried to calm him down. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend home to meet my parents. My dad was having a bad day and was rude from the outset, but things went to total hell when he started screaming that he'd "kill" our microwave if it didn't "shut the hell up". My girlfriend now thinks we're a family of abusive psychos. FML
Today, I was taking a dump, when my dad shouted for me to go wash the dishes. Fed up with his constant shit, I told him to bite me. He took this as an invitation to wedge the bathroom door shut for nearly two hours, despite all my pleas and apologies. FML
Today, I awoke in the midst of the night to find my half-naked dad drunkenly arguing with the microwave. FML
Today, my dad came home drunk off his ass. So drunk that he couldn't manage to open the refrigerator, and ended up punching it in a fit of rage. When I tried to calm him down and get him to bed, he told me to fuck off, and grounded me. FML
Today, I got into an argument with my dad in his hotel room. I lost my temper and stormed out onto the balcony for some fresh air, at which point he decided to lock the door behind me, trapping me there for half an hour while he watched TV. FML
Today, I finally had it out with my abusive father. I spent almost an hour detailing about how he constantly humiliates me in public, treats me like slime, and hits me at random when he's in a bad mood. His response was, "Quit being such a wimp" because I'm "not female." Mom took his side. I'm 16 and can't move out. FML
Today, I slammed my middle finger in a drawer. I screamed and my mom came running into the kitchen. She asked me what was wrong, so without thinking I stuck up my middle finger. She hasn't spoken to me since this morning. FML
Today, while moving a couch and repeatedly asking my dad what he was trying to do and him ignoring me, I got my hand slammed between the corner of the couch and a doorway, because my dad shoved the couch without saying anything. I was holding the corner to stop it from falling on me. FML
Today, I overheard my mom’s boyfriend viciously berating and verbally abusing her. I got in his face and started yelling that he can’t talk to her that way. He stormed out and we haven’t heard from him since. Now my mom is pissed and wants to kick me out for “ruining” her relationship. Sorry I guess. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
iaaan 0
wow jerk
Sungod 0
In Sovjet russia, door slams you! anti flooooood
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (423)
bigchedda 0
in soviet Russia the microwave door slams u! lmao
iaaan 0
-.- ilafp ilafp ilafp
iaaan 0
idk, they were a fad a while ago but now theyre just annoying.
bigchedda 0
lmao a 'FAD' it's been years since I've heard that
seanreddog 4
You lick anti-floods pussy? Good to know...
bigchedda 0
I'm confused why do comments keep dissapearing and coming back?
seanreddog 4
Because Swiper swipes them but then I tall him to go **** himself and he says "Awww man!!" and then he takes it again and "Youll never find it now!" but then we do.
ImaginaryFoe 1
Yakov Smirnov. Google it.
seanreddog 4
Why? I don't get it...
Erindub 0
No the microwave door was just the final straw sweetheart
Not_Ever_Telling 3
Oh, you're a total monster - abusing an innocent inanimate object like that! How could you do such a thing?! Haha. But for serial: OVERreaction
GhettoPanda 0
Ahahah sounds like my father xD
sproket03 0
You were probably being a bitch before you slammed the mic door. Unless your a crazy person who just slams random microwave doors for no reason. Either way, YDI.
joce445 0
GOD FORBID, WHAT IF YOU SLAM YOUR BEDROOM DOOR :O
childproofpizza 19
better grab a coffin catalogue
KDubs2156 0
u were probably being a little bitch all day and that set him off. ydi
brucesgirl 0
if you do start packing he might reconsider and say no my friends dad did if ge is a good father then he will miss you if by your screwed lol it's easier if you pay bills then he will loose one of his main sources of income
bigd2232 0
a man can only take so much
ToNstAAr 8
Had to be something more than that. You probaly did something else to.
Sporkitude 12
Sometimes, there is literally no logical reason for someone to go off like this. They might be clinically mental.