Today, my crush grabbed my butt while I was walking up the stairs. In surprise I farted. He won't even look me in the eyes now. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I saw my crush at the grocery store. He saw me and started walking towards me. I got so excited that I farted when he came near. FML
Good bye!
Today I was walking around the mall and I saw my crush from high school. He came up to me and, instead of talking to him, I burped, and he just walked away. FML
Today, the girl who I have had a crush on for two years snuck up from behind me and gave me a hug. I farted very loud at the same exact time. FML
Today, I burped in front of my crush. Well, not really in front of him. I turned around mid-burp and noticed him, not knowing anyone was there. The surprise made me scream a little, which only amplified the burp. So I made this mighty belch-turned-scream noise, while maintaining eye contact with him. FML
Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML
Skittish
Today, I've been into this guy at work forever, and we've been flirting more and more lately. Today he came up behind me, but I didn't see him. He said "Hi!" and scared me so bad that I farted. FML
Today, the guy of my dreams told me he liked me and leaned in to kiss me. Just as our lips touched, I ripped a big ass fart. FML
Today, my crush was giving a presentation in class. I zoned out and began staring off into space - which happened to be in the exact direction of his crotch. When I realized what I was doing, I quickly looked up at his face. He was already looking at me, with an expression of severe discomfort. FML
Today, my crush took me to a park and told me he loved me. We sat on an old bench and were just about to kiss when I screamed. I now have a huge splinter in my arse and he can't stop laughing. FML
My body hates me
Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML
Top comments
daybid 7
Well that stinks!
anzie_fml 9
That's a very interesting way for him to be greeting you, especially if you're still just calling him your "crush"... O.o
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Comments (137)
bubbles1996 5
Defence mecanisme activate!
UnluckyJulie 13
It's a good thing - your crush is a pig if he thinks it's okay to just randomly grab your ass in public like that.
FlyingWhisps 5
Well, you screwed up. That's too bad, you were really in there
downtime 13
50, Their relationship to each other isn't established. They may be very close friends who routinely act inappropriately with each other. Plenty of people wouldn't really mind if a close friend behaved this way, but a random classmate or acquaintance is another matter. You can't assume either way.
bhai33 9
So then screw him and like someone who doesn't care about small things like that...like me. :)
crowland0 0
Awesome!!!
DBiscool 0
Why would you let your crush grab your butt??
kittehkatrawrr 2
LOL!!! I mean.. Uhmm.. I'm sure he'll get over it eventually n.n
GlitterAngel 8
Well your arse was impressed obviously.
hateevryone 15
you ruined that.