ohlordhelpmenow
United States
Today, my dad created a new rule: It isn't old until there's mold. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Bondi414
This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff
United States
My house, my rules
Today, my dad made a new house rule: "If it's yellow, let it mellow; if it's brown, flush it down." My whole house now smells like piss. FML
moudly
United States
Today, my mom finally believed me when I said I smelled mold. I lifted up the couch, and it was covered in mold. So were the bottoms of all our furniture, our beds, and my grandma's vintage chair. We've been living in mold for the past 4 months. FML
andrea
Denver, United States
Moldy excuse
Today, my idiot daughter has allowed mold to grow in her shower. Her excuse? She thought it was just some “stains” that wouldn’t come out. Yeah, I don’t believe that. I think she knew it was mold and just didn’t care. FML
Sick
Today, I noticed a thick layer of mold growing inside the straw of my water bottle. I use that bottle every day. FML
Anonymous
Ebersbach, Germany
Cruel summer
Today, it’s a rather wet summer and everything in our house is prone to mould. No, I’m not exaggerating when I say “everything”: I just found mould growing on the plates in the cupboard. And, no, we did not accidentally put them away unwashed. FML
Cheese luv
Watson, Australia
Today, my father threw out my $100 wedge of blue cheese because it "smelled funny". FML
TheMysteriousTsundere
Today, my dad threw out all my food because a fly landed on a loaf of bread still in its package. He claims the bread and everything else that touched it is "contaminated". That was all the food I had for the rest of the month. FML
VibeCheck
Hangover blues
Today, I woke up hungover and went to the kitchen for some food. I saw what I thought was a blueberry muffin. Halfway through eating it, I realized I couldn’t taste any blueberries, so I tried another one. I then remembered my dad telling me to throw out any old food we had. It was mould. FML
Anonymous
United States
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Today, I noticed mold on my toothbrush. I have no idea how long it's been like that. I told my husband about it via text, and all he could say was, "Welp... ew." We've had a mold problem for years and I'm constantly sick. I also mentioned this and he sent me a shrugging emoji. FML
uncleaning
United States
Today, after I cleaned out the fridge of things that expired months ago, my roommate got angry and insisted upon pulling all the moldy dairy products out of the garbage and putting them back because "they weren't mine and I shouldn't throw out other people's food." FML
Top comments
perdix 31
Is he talking about food or women?
123josie123 11
The new version of 5second rule??
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (127)
123josie123 11
The new version of 5second rule??
jellybeans4833 7
More like the 5 year rule for some foods. =_=;;
Pentium_4 27
i'm going to suggest this rule to my family lol
farnsworth 3
Call him moldy balls haha just kidding
kelseyyup 5
I wish this was my family's rule. Even when there's mold me don't throw it out -.- we cut the mold off and keep eat. WTF WERE NOT POOR.
evilteddybear 0
Lol ur picture is so true
allen2688 6
Your picture is hella funny
Cassmoneyyy 15
If it's things like hard cheese, that's fine. If it's like bread, you could get sick.
halfbakedlogic 6
He's not your dad, until the DNA test verifies it, be glad!
HeavyScout 0
...right.
Michael_92 20
I think his username came into play on this one....
bizarre_ftw 22
The results are in!! Glad isn't an option anymore.
Shelbyyyyyyy 4
& that has to do with moldy food how??
nightingale96 2
THAT IS A WIN!!
Michael_92 20
How is it? I'm just curious on your logic.
eyyitsalejandra 0
I wouldn't consider mold on my food a win.
buck33 14
Tasty!
CalCommando 6
I read that in the voice the lady uses when you cook meat in Monster Hunter Tri, and I laughed so loud.
The_creator_fml 2
Expiration dates are overrated, except with milk.
killtin 2
Ya what is that milk goes bad like 2 days before the date blehh
PeteyPablo12308 20
Also with meat...
DCFan 9
AAAND... Birth Control.
MizzErikaHart 8
Actually milk stays good for a few days after the expiration date...
pompousjackass 10
sometimes weeks.
TheOnlyAlan 0
Our rule is, if you're not dead, it's not bad bread.
a1f0sff 25
Then you only know if the bread's fine after eating. Isn't it risky?
TheOnlyAlan 0
This is correct, it keeps the adrenaline going.
perdix 31
Is he talking about food or women?
jaredjudd21 2
Come on now it's obviously women.
Shelbyyyyyyy 4
10- bahahaha i love reading your comments.
thisisafunnyname 12
or men?
omfg_creepers 8
Does it matter what color of mold it is?
GoWithTheFro 10
Tell that to the food poisoning.
ladyLALAA 29
If it's brown drink it down, if it's black send it back!