Today, my cat was being surprisingly loving towards me. Normally she ignores me so I obviously found this rather odd. She kept meowing so I assumed she was hungry. As I was getting up to feed her, she stood up and pooped all over me, my bed and phone, then turned away and ran. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got home after a rough day and was really looking forward to some cuddles from my cat. I opened the door and she came running toward me, which was unusual, so I knelt down to embrace her. She ran right past me to get to the tuna sandwich I'd unwittingly dropped on the floor. FML
Today, I was woken up by my cat, who normally doesn't bother me in the morning, meowing desperately and trying to get me to wake up. Fearing that something was very wrong, I jumped out of bed. He gestured for me to follow him, so I did. I followed him all the way to the kitchen, where he proceeded to puke. FML
Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me. I was getting undressed to get into the shower. My cat looked at me after I'd undressed and then threw up all over the rug. FML
Today, my cat fell into the toilet, jumped out, and ran straight to hide in my bed. FML
Today, my cat woke me up by vomiting a big, warm, stinky hairball on my neck and then left. I think she was smiling as she trotted away. FML
Today, I finally got myself settled into bed around 2 in the morning after a very long day. My cat started to snuggle with me when I smelled something disgusting. Turns out my cat sharted in my bed. FML
Today, in the early hours of the morning, my cat started scratching at my legs. I got out of bed and he raced me to the stairs, tripping me. I fell all the way down and landed in cat poop. FML
Today, after being filled with joy after seeing my very elderly cat finally enjoying the sun in my garden, I skipped over to give her a hug. Turns out she was taking a shit. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up behind my cat and scare it with a loud "boo!" The cat responded by jumping up, and running across my apartment, which would have been fine, except for the fact she left a trail of liquid shit everywhere she went. FML
Today, I was playing with my cat and holding her upside down. She started frantically meowing, but I still continued on playing with her. Seconds later, she got explosive diarrhea everywhere, including my hair, face, shirt, and mouth. FML
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Top comments
WittyMoron 22
The classic shit-and-run. That's what I'm talking about.
Fuaaad1994 31
Looks like you own a troll cat
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Comments (81)
vitjoey4 14
There is a reason I hate cats.
TAntobella 14
And that reason is that you refuse to learn about them and just look for bias instead.
Witchylady 18
She was trying to tell you she wanted to go outside and poop. Serves you right. Most people have no idea how to understand cats. They constantly speak to us using gestures, movements but how many people stop to actually try and understand what they are telling you. Cats are extremely intelligent creatures. You just need to learn to understand what she wants
shoower_fml 9
My cat shit on my carpet a couple times, and she stared at me while she did it. Wtf stupid ass lol
Sansational_ 18
Yet more anecdotal proof that cats are complete douchebags. Take that, crazy-cat-person ex girlfriend!
The_ghetto_mango 25
They are not!
The_ghetto_mango 25
Not to make a bad pun, but that seems like a crappy situation to be in, so to speak.
tiredofwaiting 25
Awww she is obviously really sick. I'd take her to the vet if I were you.
TAntobella 14
She was feeling unwell and was trying to get comfort and resssurance from your presence, and probably help too, but than the sickness got the best of her and she couldn't control her bowels. It is not her fault. Have her checked by a vet asap
haphazardly 15
She was obviously in pain. Take her to the vet, my cat acts out like this when she has a UTI or something.
ninelives4 1
She's obviously sick and needs your help. Don't be selfish. You shouldn't be posting an FML you should get the cat to the vet.
martin8337 36
You've heard of Fiddler On The Roof? Now we have. Piddler On The Bed.