Today, after being filled with joy after seeing my very elderly cat finally enjoying the sun in my garden, I skipped over to give her a hug. Turns out she was taking a shit. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my cat was being surprisingly loving towards me. Normally she ignores me so I obviously found this rather odd. She kept meowing so I assumed she was hungry. As I was getting up to feed her, she stood up and pooped all over me, my bed and phone, then turned away and ran. FML
Today, my cat woke me up by vomiting a big, warm, stinky hairball on my neck and then left. I think she was smiling as she trotted away. FML
Today, I saw my cat outside taking a dump. I pulled back the curtain and watched him clean it up, because I found it fascinating that animals can do that. I must have been standing there for several minutes before I noticed the neighbour next door looking at me being fascinated by my cat pooing. FML
Today, I was enjoying my dinner by my patio window when I spotted a cat roaming through my backyard. As I observed it explore my yard, I also watched as it climbed onto, then took a piss on the freshly clean clothes I had left to dry. FML
Today, my cat pissed in my zen garden. FML
Today, I finally got myself settled into bed around 2 in the morning after a very long day. My cat started to snuggle with me when I smelled something disgusting. Turns out my cat sharted in my bed. FML
Today, I realized that since I started working full time, the only friend I have left is my cat. Lonely and bored out of my mind, I told him about my day. He decided to end the conversation by shitting on the floor. FML
Today, I went to clean my cat's litter box, not realizing she was in it. As I lifted the top half of the litter box up, she sprayed me with piss. FML
Today, I got home after a rough day and was really looking forward to some cuddles from my cat. I opened the door and she came running toward me, which was unusual, so I knelt down to embrace her. She ran right past me to get to the tuna sandwich I'd unwittingly dropped on the floor. FML
Today, my cat fell into the toilet, jumped out, and ran straight to hide in my bed. FML
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Top comments
gonad_gobbler 1
Oh man you cat be serious! C'mon you've got to be kitten me! That sounds like a catastrophe! Hopefully you can put this event behind you and "fur-get" about it.
Mifflicious 18
According to your profile, you want to be a veterinarian. I really suggest you don't if you think hugging cats is strange. Jeez..
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Comments (192)
OffToTheGayBar 9
Look before you leap, er, hug, in this case. :3
jellybeardoggie 4
Is that twilight sparkle ?
OffToTheGayBar 9
Quite. (:
Heinousness 0
Like...... I don't know what the **** you two are talking about but it has to do with the picture, right?
RussianFox 13
They were talking about one of the greatest characters in cartoon history.
Heinousness 0
That doesn't help me. Be more specific, please!!!!!!it would help!!
AshleyAndAshli 9
Twilight Sparkle is the pony in the picture, it is one of the ponies from My Little Pony...second best to Rainbow Dash, hope I helped! :)
Heinousness 0
154-Your pic goes with the comment in that what-the-****-is-wrong-with-all-the-world-today sort of way (I would know)
Heinousness 0
Oh, you DON'T see it? It's just damn creepy if you think about it. And what's with all the My Little Pony pics? You were also helpful.
ShyAnn29 15
I used to like My Little Pony as a kid, I haven't seen the new ones though
GoingToBeAPilot1 6
Proceed with the poop jokes.
nofearjenshere 12
And the pussy jokes.
GoingToBeAPilot1 6
Yep
ClassyCommando 13
Catch it.
kateRAWR 4
That was a shitty situation !
THE_A_TEEN 28
^Kill it!
Heinousness 0
Not to be totally off- topic( which I do more often than not) but do any of you hate 'an arrow to the knee?'(I have a joke related containing it) You know what? **** all your opinions, I'm saying it anyway, I used to do the same thing but then I took an arrow to the knee. There, I said it. Feel free to thumb me as you want
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
^ okay, it's like your having a conversation, when no one was actually talking to you...
CryMoreFMLs 15
You are quite indubitably insane, 152.
Heinousness 0
In that what-the-****-is-wrong-with-the-world-today kind of way, 176. In my family, that's sane. OP, shit happens Yeah, I said it.
Heinousness 0
173-when you don't have true friends, you talk to yourself. I wish I could talk to someone, but no one cares..... WAIT A SECOND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
^ haha, funny... :S
chris36taylor 2
Got nothing to say
burz_fml 5
Kinky...
TheElderTROLLZ 15
Yes, taking a shit is kinky.
ninjadinos 14
No it's not... Now urinating... THAT'S kinky.
LaughinStock 16
Hmmm seems like you two haven't seen two girls one cup. Apparently shit can be kinky.
nirvi 3
Two girls and a cup is disgusting at the very least.
fishface517 10
You didn't notice the cat squatting?
BigCheezy73 2
You would think if the cat was that old you would know what it looks like when it's ******** by now.
CheckItOutItsYou 7
I'm guessing she didn't
ShyAnn29 15
36, when OP says garden, she means yard
SkoomaKi 28
90 I wasn't aware that a yard and a garden were different? o.O
koolkat27 13
133-
koolkat27 13
In the US, a garden is considered a little part of the yard where you keep your plants and flowers.
gonad_gobbler 1
Oh man you cat be serious! C'mon you've got to be kitten me! That sounds like a catastrophe! Hopefully you can put this event behind you and "fur-get" about it.
thats_my_job 11
You have the best comments. I really enjoy reading them.
Urbanchiller 0
Too many puns.. Mind blown.
coffee_man900 16
That's the idea... Mind blowing... Yah! :)
Truth_Nazi 0
Reminds me of "Meowsy Mcdurban" (or however it's spelled from Family Guy.
honeybuncher 3
Those were purrfect puns.
honeybuncher 3
Those were purrfect puns.
honeybuncher 3
Darn thing posted that twice. Sorry!
Cad6 24
Those were actually, admittedly, great puns. Good show sir. :)
BrysGirl27 14
Hahahaha omg meow that's alot of puns
izawesome96 8
Your so punny! :)
DuffleBagHero 4
Well next time don't disturb her. She was doing the do !
i_wuz_nver_here 31
Hey at least she was takin a shit, that stuff clogs up wen they get old
Pelreskovich 11
Do you skip around whenever you're happy?
micahsmommy 13
Don't you?
Pelreskovich 11
I don't skip, I gallop.. Or frolic.
micahsmommy 13
Dang it and here I thought everyone skipped when they were happy. Guess I'll have to find something else to do so I don't look weird. Don't want to be one of those embarrassing mothers.
justinetyme 4
Your profile picture is so cute :)
im_too_pro 2
You could have looked over and your elderly cat could be dead...do I guess that was best case scenario
coffee_man900 16
That's what I thought OP was going to say when I first started reading the FML. Funny to say, I'm glad the cat was pooping instead of dying. :)