Today, my boyfriend wouldn't have sex with me because he doesn't want his mom "watching from heaven." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Cougartown
Today, my boyfriend snuck out of my room so he could have sex with my mom in the next room. FML
Knock next time please
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was about to suck his dick when my mom walked in. FML
Priorities
Today, I learned that my mother might not live much longer. My boyfriend, instead of showing compassion asked me, "We're still having video chat sex, right?" FML
Today, my mom walked in on me and my boyfriend having sex. She was completely embarrassed (as was I) and she flew out of the room. My boyfriend, on the other hand, still wanted to finish. FML
The birds and the bees
Today, I was having the "sex talk" with my mom because I really want to have sex with my boyfriend. My dad overheard us and is sulking. The only reason he hasn’t said anything like, “I’ll kill the boy” or, “Not until you’re married” is because he’s scared of my mom. Now everything is awkward at home FML
Today, my boyfriend kept whining at me, asking why I wouldn't have sex with him, seemingly not caring that my parents were in the room. FML
Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML
Pick your moments, dude!
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic night. As we were having sex, he decided to say, "Look mom, no hands!" and it totally ruined the mood. FML
Today, I learned that my 29-year-old boyfriend won't stay the night at my house because he lives at home with his parents and doesn't want to have "the discussion" with his mom about me. FML
Today, hours after being turned down for sex, I woke up to my boyfriend sitting at the computer, jacking off to a picture of my deceased mom. FML
Top comments
SunnyUserName123 5
Would you want your mother to watch you have sex?
RawrNom 0
awww. I can see that, give him a while? I got that that with peeing when I was like nine. god could see! I grew out of it aha.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (157)
jack_tells_truth 0
You're dating him, you deserve it
MROMRO 0
Hahahahahahahahahahaha. DENIED.
Sushimomo 0
**** block. And you thought it was annoying when she was alive...
Raheemdplayer 7
If he says that a lot then, I think it's time to find a new boyfriend, someone who can get boners when they see two bee stings. FYL
leadsails320 0
Jesus is watching you, and apparently so is his mother.
pumpkinlover11 5
Haha i guess he wont be having sex anymore!
JRSOne 5
When I was like 12 I was afraid to wank it after my grandmother passed I was like I dont want her to know!
Levvy 22
So, he's sworn to a life of celibacy and his mother was a voyeur with incestuous tendencies? Get out now.
GeddyLee 0
I'll have sex with u
FlyingLazerWALRU 0
Tell him he can't even ********** anymore then. And tell him to stop looking at ****, oogling other women, and if needed, to stop being gay. Ask him what his mom would think about him doing all that stuff, and see if he still wont have sex with you.
Lacrosse00 0
Wow! Girl give me your address...I'll come over and smash...give you what your body is really hungry for...oh and his mom can watch all she wants.