Today, my boyfriend wouldn't have sex with me because he doesn't want his mom "watching from heaven." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Cougartown
Today, my boyfriend snuck out of my room so he could have sex with my mom in the next room. FML
Knock next time please
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was about to suck his dick when my mom walked in. FML
Priorities
Today, I learned that my mother might not live much longer. My boyfriend, instead of showing compassion asked me, "We're still having video chat sex, right?" FML
Today, my mom walked in on me and my boyfriend having sex. She was completely embarrassed (as was I) and she flew out of the room. My boyfriend, on the other hand, still wanted to finish. FML
The birds and the bees
Today, I was having the "sex talk" with my mom because I really want to have sex with my boyfriend. My dad overheard us and is sulking. The only reason he hasn’t said anything like, “I’ll kill the boy” or, “Not until you’re married” is because he’s scared of my mom. Now everything is awkward at home FML
Today, my boyfriend kept whining at me, asking why I wouldn't have sex with him, seemingly not caring that my parents were in the room. FML
Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML
Pick your moments, dude!
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic night. As we were having sex, he decided to say, "Look mom, no hands!" and it totally ruined the mood. FML
Today, I learned that my 29-year-old boyfriend won't stay the night at my house because he lives at home with his parents and doesn't want to have "the discussion" with his mom about me. FML
Today, hours after being turned down for sex, I woke up to my boyfriend sitting at the computer, jacking off to a picture of my deceased mom. FML
Top comments
SunnyUserName123 5
Would you want your mother to watch you have sex?
RawrNom 0
awww. I can see that, give him a while? I got that that with peeing when I was like nine. god could see! I grew out of it aha.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (157)
hotPinklipstick 24
if she died recently then I completely understand that and you should give him some time. When my mom died it was hard for me to continue having sex with my boyfriend, not only for fear the she was watching (because I do believe in heaven and hell) but because I was still an emotional wreck. if she died years ago and y'all have been having sex and he just now started using this excuse i would be worried if I were you...
onthetoilet 3
Well said
Cinn_fml 23
Pretty much what hotPinklipstick said, and I quite like loserman's (#39) take on it as well. OP, just talk to him and try to understand his point of view, he probably just needs some time.
tmmundy 17
My mom died July 23, 2011. After a long day of putting her to rest, my husband wanted to have sex, not make love, and I say that bc he knew what I had been threw with her the last three months. Of course I said no. At that point it was just not the right time. But op, give him time, he will come around. After all, his mom did just die. It will get better. Trust me.
itsbrookebixch 0
Exactly!
Jasonf6 0
Time to cut that nutjob loose.
iamfabio1990 12
I've never heard of an angel that likes to watch, I suppose if it was true it would make every love session a little kinkier...
docscientist 10
Exhume her from her grave and show your bf that she is in fact, actually still in the ground, deaf, blind, and mute. I'm sure he'll happily oblige after.
jizzwold 21
Thank you captain atheist
docscientist 10
Op's boyfriend's idiocy deserves a facetious response.
LOLbomb 1
No one likes to be around a souless, emotionless, walking, talking chunk of meat that shows no interest in the beauty of life itself. Jesus, it's like I'm staring at a note that Death himself had written.
leemurcat 5
There needs to be some respect for others' viewpoints here.
JoeSaysSsso 2
respect? others views? nahhh...
Deathhound 27
Wow, so he will never have Sex!
Senior29 8
if she's in heaven she probably has better things 2 do :p
rattusrattus 19
Like watching the cute gay guys down the road? If I was perving from Heaven, I would have much better couples to watch than my own family.
Senior29 8
y'd she watch gay guys wen she cud **** with male angels?
jizzwold 21
For some reason I doubt that the afterlife is an orgy.
rattusrattus 19
@79 In that case, I don't want to be in your afterlife.
RainbowHeadache 2
Glad my boyfriend doesn't use that excuse. It'd be worse since both his parents would be watching. Creepy. Pretty sure people in heaven would have better things to do other than watch people screw. But then again maybe not. It's live ****.
rubberducky5609 3
Ewe but its like, Your kids **** xD
jaybirdrampage 0
Maybe he's actually gay?
EnEl_Infierno 15
Op you're nuts if you think she'd be watching you, i'd imagen she'd be to busy and having fun hanging out with Elvis, Mj, Sanatra, and enjoying the endless joys of heaven, no reason you shouldn't enjoy yourself either.
EnEl_Infierno 15
dammit I thumb myself down, I know o messed my comment.
EnEl_Infierno 15
FU*KIN I HAAAAATE THIS PHONE! FML.
krysxkatastrophe 14
What's she going to do about it? Haunt him?
eltapatio16 5
Ha