Today, my boyfriend still couldn't work out where my clitoris is. It's RIGHT THERE, you idiot. I've pointed it out, but each time it's like he needs a compass and a map or something. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Not going so well, is it?
Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. When I didn't get off right away, he asked what he was doing wrong. I told him he was doing fine, but instead of focusing only on my vagina, he might want to pay attention to my clitoris as well. His response? "What's a clitoris?" FML
Nearly there
Today, I had to play the hot and cold game with my boyfriend until he found my clitoris. FML
Today, I was trying to be sexy and rub my boyfriend's un-aroused package while we were watching a movie. I couldn't find it. FML
Found it
Today, my boyfriend was about to go down on me as foreplay before losing his virginity and he actually poked my clitoris and said, "What’s this thing?" FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't know what it's like to be turned on. Apparently, I've been doing something wrong for the past two years. FML
Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he flicks my clitoris just right, my legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously. FML
Nothing?
Today, my boyfriend is still determined to find my kink. I keep telling him I don’t have one. Literally, I don’t. He isn’t forcing me to do anything physically but he won’t drop the subject. He keeps making all these different suggestions and expecting me to have some magical discovery or something. FML
Dick appointment
Today, I walked out halfway through a much anticipated dick appointment because it became apparent that he thought my clit was located somewhere on my upper thigh. He kept rubbing it and moaning, "Oooooh, I bet you like that, baby." No, sir, I certainly did not. FML
Today, frustrated that my boyfriend never gives me any orgasms when we make love, I tried politely hinting that he needs to improve. To start with, I said maybe he should be more spontaneous in bed. He replied, "What, like putting it in your ass? Gotcha." Great. FML
Today, I was explaining the inner parts of a vagina and how they work. To my boyfriend. FML
Top comments
steve247 2
Try circling it with a sharpie?
orgasm_blush 4
Hmmm. How old are you guys I feel like that might play a big part in this.
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Comments (362)
TheyCallmeStacey 9
Lots of guys dont know where it is or even how to work with so maybe its best he doesnt know
haqqnuru 3
Get a new person to show you or **** you. He does not deserve you.Get a new person to show you or **** you. He does not deserve you.
Krulin 8
Jacob Two-Two, I didn't know you had an account here! Jacob Two-Two, I didn't know you had an account here!
stupidgingers 6
Always time for a teaching moment and do it with the lights on first. lol
xXkingmikeXx 5
The fact that u said map or compass shows how immature u are
burndog61 0
show him how you do it yourself...or rent a **** for him to watch and learn.....
Twisted_Angel 17
Perhaps the problem is all the hair? Maybe shave an arrow into your muff pointing where he needs to search? Or get a new guy. You calling him an idiot over something so stupid makes me think you're a bitch and he's just trying to piss you off.
Fohz 9
Many women ****** through clitoral stimulation. So I really don't think her being able to get off is something "stupid".
lulzmylife 4
Hey asshole troll: imagine that every time you had sex, you got all worked up and aroused...and then didn't have an ******. At all. Think that might be just a little bit frustrating? Congratulations, now you know how it feels to be a woman with a selfish dick of a boyfriend. If you think actually satisfying your partner is "stupid," I sure as heck hope no one is foolish enough to ever date you, you selfish little prick.
phiend99 4
Keep calling him an idiot or a moron. That makes it so much more worthwhile. Maybe he doesn't WANT to find it.
McQuack_fml 0
DIY I'm sure he'll pick up on it after watching for a bit
Thefeelofcotton 0
YDI for having a small clit
5t3ff1k4h 47
Even if it was that small, she pointed it out for him. The boyfriend's an idiot. You're right up there with him.
cherryllollo 7
at least u know he's inexperienced and pure. now u can be the one to turn him into a dirty boy. if u guys have sex u shud b able to discuss ur issues..