Today, I was released from jail. I had helped a three year old girl get up after falling on a wet floor at the mall last night when the security guards tasered me. Only this morning did they tell me they had mistaken me for a child molester that looks a little bit like me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was released from jail. Why was I in jail? Last night, I used my taser on a much larger, drunken male individual who wouldn't physically keep his hands off me, despite me telling him to back off. Everything was on camera outside the bar, yet I'm the one who was arrested. Thank you California laws. FML
Today, I was once again mistaken for an escaped convict. I live near a women's correctional facility and apparently my nursing scrubs look a lot like their prisoners' uniforms. The cop made me late for work. FML
Today, I was walking my little sister home from the eye doctor. It was raining out so we were kind of in a hurry to get home. We get home and about half an hour later, the cops show up. Apparently, someone saw me walking my sister and called the cops on me thinking I was a child molester. FML
Today, I was in the library when police arrested me for threatening people. The librarian even told them I did nothing wrong, and that the actual girl they wanted had already left. They took me in anyway. My dad sided with the police and let me “think about what I did” in jail overnight. FML
Today, I got bailed out of jail. I was there because I saw a girl being hit by her boyfriend. I rushed over to help only to have her hit me repeatedly. The cops came and she blamed her bruises on me. The boyfriend corroborated her story. FML
Today, I was put in lockup for accidentally scaring the officer by lifting my hand to scratch my head. FML
Today, I was at work when two sheriff's deputies walked in. They asked me my name and when I told them, they asked me to turn around and they cuffed me. They told me I was under arrest for robbery. Turns out I was mistakenly IDed, but now every one at my job thinks I'm an armed robber. FML
Today, I'm recovering from being pepper-sprayed, beat with a baton and Tased, and arrested for assault. I'm a bouncer and was trying to remove a drunk asshole from the bar when the police showed up. FML
Today, I was arrested on my 25th birthday and thrown in jail overnight for impersonating myself. FML
Today, I was shot and arrested for trespassing. I'm a firefighter and I was saving a child. FML
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Top comments
EngineerJane 0
That's today society for you. All males are rapist and all females are goddesses.
indiablue 4
sucks to be you!
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Comments (106)
indiablue 4
sucks to be you!
therealdavid 0
U got tasered. lucky
Bobissmall 13
Nah it's not an FML. YDI for helping people.
marcychick 0
I don't know what's worse, getting mistaken for a child molester or the fact they didn't let you out after they found out your name?
sadistmonkey 19
@marcychick - What are you talking about? They did release him.
dunicha 20
Marcy is saying he should have been released immediately upon discovering that he was not the suspected child molester. You know, like once they realized he didn't have the same name.
sadistmonkey 19
And how do you know that that's not the case?
boatkicker 5
Because "last night" he was tasered and "this morning" he was told that he wasn't who they thought he was.
sadistmonkey 19
Maybe they found out "this morning".
deliciouscake 3
Lawsuit?
Thumpingsteve 4
first
BobOsso_fml 8
Not first. Sucks to be you.
carical 0
:/
dezinspaaace 0
diache, fyl OP that sucks balls.
WOW_BS 0
YDI For trying to help a stranger. If everyone in the world started helping others a lot of gay babies will be born.
SereniLove 0
true GNP, damn doppelgangers
sourgirl101 29
I bet you're curious what this other guy looks like in comparison to you.
EngineerJane 0
That's today society for you. All males are rapist and all females are goddesses.
sourgirl101 29
Hmmm, I wonder if the OP got tasered and arrested by male or female cops? If that's how you think.
afdude87 6
whats sad about today's society is that some people think like you.
sheehan35 2
actually 21 he was saying some people think that sooo....
BecauseIAmBatman_fml 22
Goddesses? Are you kidding? **** shaming has never been as bad as today.
The_Dude_Abides_ 0
you totally deserve it for trying to be nice and help someone lol it never pays to be nice anymore didn't ya know O.o
CreateZ 0
Herbert the Pervert?
The_Dude_Abides_ 0
Chester the molester
CreateZ 0
Ben Dover
The_Dude_Abides_ 0
^^ that doesn't really work here lol
DoubleEdgedBlade 4
Tucker the Toucher?
dominickdc 0
hahaha no pussy
cocobulla1 4
good job 12 and 13!!! I like those, and the Tucker one..... yah try again
Carbonite 0
sue?
mudkipsan 19
I'm sure you're aware than every FML has at least one person calling for a lawsuit, regardless of how trivial the offense was. However, OP, if there was ever an FML that called for a lawsuit, it is this one. I mean, even if you had been a serial molester and had a trenchcoat full of candy and dongs, you hadn't done anything at that point that could have justified being shot with a taser, and then detained. Since you said you got out of jail, that means that you were also charged and arrested by the police. I'm curious what the mall ninjas' report to the police was. Even if the charges are dropped, you still need to get your record expunged, unless you want "arrested but not convicted for fiddling toddlers in the mall" to show up on every background check you get from now until the day you die.
Zebidee 9
I agree - this is a completely legitimate reason to sue. Presumably this was in OP's home town in plain sight of people they would know. Being arrested as a child molester would be an insanely big deal, especially in a small town. People who saw the arrest aren't there to see the release and apology. I'm not a big fan of 'my pizza was delivered cold, so I'm gonna SUE!!11!!', but if ever there was a time to lawyer up, this would be it.
dabbers23 0
guys have you ever thought that some of these people just fake stories and he could have made this up