Today, my boyfriend's mom got him a shitload of Axe for his birthday. Now I get nauseous whenever I go near him. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend decided to gift me soap, a razor, and deodorant for my birthday. FML
Today, my 13-year-old son discovered Axe. Axe shower gel. Axe shampoo. Axe body spray. All at once. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me acne cream for my birthday. FML
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend was kind enough to give me prescription strength deodorant. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. People always joke about how horrible Axe is, but this guy sprayed it on so thick that I genuinely had to fight to not retch the entire time. It was so bad that at one point I thought I was going to pass out. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like his grandma's house. FML
Today, my mother chewed me out for not wearing deodorant and smelling of B.O. I was wearing plenty of deodorant. My shirt just smelled like my boyfriend, whom I'd been cuddling with earlier. FML
Today, my boyfriend's mother told me she bought the same perfume that my boyfriend got me for Christmas last year. He loves that perfume. Now, whenever he smells me, he's going to think of his mom. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting his parents. When we got there, I hugged his mother, and she glared at me. Later that day, I heard her telling her son that he should leave me because I smell like cigarettes, and she hates smokers. I don't smoke, my boyfriend does. He did all the way there. FML
Today, my son sprayed Axe body-spray all over the house in the vain hope of covering up the scent of the joints he'd been smoking. FML
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Top comments
BntyHntrSeattle 30
Give him the ax or you yourself will timber.
billy199494 14
She must want you to stay away
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Comments (133)
lizard365 12
this is probably bad advise but if well...bathe yourself in perfume and when he says something say exactly how I feel with you lol
Soloman212 28
At least you acknowledge it's bad advice.
lizard365 12
Haha yes I have alot of bad advise and good advise but I throw that in with bad advise and I'm not ashamed to admit it...speaking of which never ask me for advice lol
fivetimeslonger 24
Dear lord, it's "advice" as in giving advice to someone not to wear so much damn axe. I would advise you to learn the difference.
FranklySpeaking 11
@86, Actually its correct. Depending on where you are. In the UK, it is common to see such "misspellings".
gorilladuck 6
If he is the type of guy who wears axe, you should already be nauseous when you're around him
Miss_Whipped 43
She should be nauseated. Not nauseous. In reality though, not every Axe wearer is a douchebag. If anyone is to blame for the overuse of Axe body spray, it is the advertisers who decided to make Axe about sexual appeal in commercials.
garebear61 14
The stick deodorant is not that bad, but the spray will suffocate you!
LaLince 40
Don't wait too long: tell him not to use it because it's too strong.
dimple13194 10
Steal it
blondeambition1 4
This reminded me of when I was in university. There was this guy who wore a shit tonne of cologne. Maybe even more than one kind! One day I was sitting in my dorm room and I could have sworn I smelled him. My friends agreed that the room smelled like him though he'd never actually been there. Five mins later he appeared at the door. He'd actually put on so much we had advanced notice lol
themouseman1212 16
Ok. I'm the only grammar police. She was nauseated, not nauseous. Something that causes nausea is nauseous. Ok. Now vote me down.
Nymeria_fml 25
We must take you to the people in charge of the Oxford Dictionary and the Merriam-Webster Dictionary! It seems like no one has gone all grammar police on them, because they say you can use either nauseous or nauseated. :/ Or, maybe you're just wrong...
Senseless_487 29
Something that causes nausea is nauseating, while you're at it.
mikbrooke 25
well with my quick google search on 'nauseous', the first definition to come up was 'feeling inclined to vomit.' whereas 'nauseated' was 'affect with nausea.' so #29, you can use either. please dont be the grammar police unless you are going to be entirely correct.
olpally 33
Throw that out and tell him to stop wearing it because it makes you sick. Simple.
EpicGuy70 13
I can't stand the spray on axe. It stops my breathing for a second after coming in contact with it.
_G0D_ 9
I like the smell of it. I put my nose to my body and smell it all day long.
ishchandan 14
Tell him that axe is not a shower in a can