Today, my boyfriend's mom got him a shitload of Axe for his birthday. Now I get nauseous whenever I go near him. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend decided to gift me soap, a razor, and deodorant for my birthday. FML
Today, my 13-year-old son discovered Axe. Axe shower gel. Axe shampoo. Axe body spray. All at once. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me acne cream for my birthday. FML
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend was kind enough to give me prescription strength deodorant. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. People always joke about how horrible Axe is, but this guy sprayed it on so thick that I genuinely had to fight to not retch the entire time. It was so bad that at one point I thought I was going to pass out. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like his grandma's house. FML
Today, my mother chewed me out for not wearing deodorant and smelling of B.O. I was wearing plenty of deodorant. My shirt just smelled like my boyfriend, whom I'd been cuddling with earlier. FML
Today, my boyfriend's mother told me she bought the same perfume that my boyfriend got me for Christmas last year. He loves that perfume. Now, whenever he smells me, he's going to think of his mom. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting his parents. When we got there, I hugged his mother, and she glared at me. Later that day, I heard her telling her son that he should leave me because I smell like cigarettes, and she hates smokers. I don't smoke, my boyfriend does. He did all the way there. FML
Today, my son sprayed Axe body-spray all over the house in the vain hope of covering up the scent of the joints he'd been smoking. FML
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Top comments
BntyHntrSeattle 30
Give him the ax or you yourself will timber.
billy199494 14
She must want you to stay away
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Comments (133)
sanecatlady 13
I hate those stupid Axe commercials that feed upon the hormones and insecurities of young males by telling them smearing on that crap will make then so incredibly attractive that female angels will drift down from the sky and then rip off their wings and throw away their halos so they can have sinful, foul-smelling sex. Seriously, I really did see TV commercial like that.
amisenho 11
I hate those stupid makeup commercials that feed upon the hormones and insecurities of young females by telling them smearing on that crap will make then so incredibly attractive that male models will drift down from the sky and then rip off their shirts and throw away their boxers so they can have sinful, foul-smelling sex. Seriously, I really did see a TV commercial like that. Brought to you by makeup: making people feel more insecure about themselves since ancient Egyptian times.
Demonface54 20
How much is a shitload?
shakile78 7
Buy a cheap gas mask a use it in front of him to make him feel bad. Or, fake cough in front of him.
False_Stupidity 42
I don't think she'll need to fake the cough.
Wafflestomper 22
No, now he smells like Eau d'ouche.
grritsshay 18
I have yet to meet someone who uses axe and doesn't douse it on. Gives me a headache.
mkayden 23
*le sings* 'Oh why are we are waiting so long, I'm suffocating'.
Wye14 15
Nauseated*