Today, my boyfriend got so happy when he thought he'd finally given me an orgasm. I was covering an urge to sneeze. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, when my boyfriend was about to orgasm, I suddenly sneezed all over his face. FML
Today, I realized it feels better when I sneeze than when my boyfriend and I have sex. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on when I realized I had to sneeze. Not wanting to sneeze on her, I tried my hardest to hold it in. When I climaxed, I couldn't hold it in any more and sneezed all over her face. FML
Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. After about five minutes, he sneezes violently on me. I don't know what's worse, him getting snot all over my intimate bits or the fact that the sneeze felt better then what he was doing. FML
Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob for the first time. He came. A lot. I doubt I'll remember it as anything other than, "The day I found out what sneezing semen feels like." FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me an amazing orgasm after a long dry spell. I moaned his name as I climaxed, and he replied, "What?" FML
Today, I witnessed my boyfriend sneeze in his hands, and then lick it. FML
Today, I sneezed. My boyfriend told me to shut up. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. She started panting harder and going, "AH, AH, AH..." and I thought she was about to come. Next thing I know, there's snot splattered all over my face and neck. Turns out it was a sneeze. FML
Today, I was making out with a guy I really like. Midway through, he stopped and said he had to sneeze. After waiting several seconds, he said the urge went away and we kept making out. Ten seconds later, he violently sneezed in my open mouth. FML
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Top comments
Keevarou 17
Understandable that he would be happy, not everyone knows how to make a girl come. But maybe you should talk to him about what you like in bed or not, communication is the key after all. But you should be honest, that was all, have a nice day.
jDCrackpot 7
I think you kinda deserve it- You need to teach him how to get you off, and the 'finally' makes me think you haven't. A clit isn't a doorbell, you can't just press and hope someone comes!
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Comments (109)
titzenpitzer 9
woulda coulda shoulda. I hope you didn't pull up your upper lip too, cause that'd be a weird orgasmface.
Theactuary 0
You know the best way to make a girl ******? WHO CARES
DocBastard 40
HAHAHAHA it's funny because...wait, why did you think this is funny? The only people who think this way are misogynists and clueless little teenage boys who haven't been near a ****** since they were born. So which one are you, tough guy?
RedPillSucks 33
both
Spanik 10
Couldn't agree more 45!!
Theactuary 0
Are misogynist and clueless little teenage(d) boy my only options? Is tough guy a third option, or is that paired with one of the earlier two options? I have the same question about not being near a ****** since I was born. I guess between the ample choices provided, I'll go with misogynist tough guy who hasn't been near a ****** since he was born. I hope that your honorable defense of the vaginal ****** via anonymous insult gets you some sweet FML pussy, which you'll of course dominate since you provide such compelling ultimatums for those who choose not to care. Just kidding. Just because everyone calls you a pussy doesn't mean you're the clit commander. You're just a pussy =D
Tmoney20 3
Dammmmmmmnnnnn!!!!!! Poor guy!!! He thought he was handling his business.. If he only knew he failed yet again:-(
Synistiel 14
YDI, honestly. You need to tell him what feels good to you, instead of letting him think that. Because once you fake it, you'll probably have to fake it for as long as you're with him, unless you tell him that "doesn't feel good anymore". Be honest with him and tell him you were holding back a sneeze.
TorTorGirl1 1
Hahaha!
kieferr 8
Teach him the right way then? YDI if you won't just tell him he isn't doing it right.
CrazyManNo9 29
Girls need to take responsibility for their own ****** by helping their partner AND helping themselves. YDI if you don't and YOU are the one failing not him.
urjustaniceone 0
Must have been one of those completely over-exaggerated-cartoon sneezes...
RedPillSucks 33
Have him watch while you ********** and bring on your own O. Make sure he's up close so he can understand what's happening. Then have him repeat it until he gets it right, or you go dry.
urMaster 0
Lol!!!!