Today, my boyfriend drove to my house to break up with me. He only did so after I'd vacuumed the whole house to compensate for his cat allergies. I thought he was just coming to dinner. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be a good idea to break up with me in his car. I had to walk home. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He let me know by shaving "CYA" into my dog's fur and then moving out before I got home from work. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I had only been dating him for about a month. Thinking he wouldn't take it very hard, I invited him over so I could tell him in person. Little did I know he was going to start crying on my couch and not leave for 5 hours. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via text, right after I finished cleaning his apartment and dropping off a bunch of booze I bought for a big party we were having. It turns out that big party was his "newly single" party. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. As I was leaving his house, I heard him shout, "Hey! Wait! Sweetie, get back here!" He was talking to his cat who'd run out the door behind me. FML
Today, I went over to my boyfriend's house to break up with him. When I got there, I got sent on a scavenger hunt that ended with him proposing to me. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend after concluding we're not compatible at all. He said he knew it all along, but he thought I was "good for all the house stuff." FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to text him when I got home after driving 40 miles in bad weather from his house back to mine. When I did, he broke up with me. FML
Today, my boyfriend called and said he was stopping by to talk. I didn't understand why he would stop by, so I asked if he was going to break up with me, he said no. Half an hour later, he knocked on my door to break up with me. FML
Today, my boyfriend of almost a year and a half broke up with me when he decided he wasn't in love with me anymore. We gave our stuff back, he was joking and happy the whole time until I told him I was taking back my cat. At that point he burst into tears. FML
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Top comments
DrNuggetcase 3
That sucks, but at least your house is clean!
Roevera 14
atleast he didn't just text a break up. but still. shouldn't have made you vacuum..
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Comments (123)
ishmail2000 4
You should mail him the contents of that vacuum canister.
canucks92 0
At least you got a clean house out of it
Big_T360 6
Well actually vacuuming makes the allergies worse. So maybe he was upset about that.
ankoku 2
Get a shop vac from DIY, hook up your b/fs vacuum bag to it, flip the switch to reverse, and revenge.
LifeHasMoments 8
Never assume anything in this world...I'v learned that the hard way.
Dracoboxer357 36
85- Friend......if I may.....? I'm happy for you that you're a nudist. I'm thrilled you're comfortable with yourself. But, uhm, no offense, I think I would have rather seen your face before I saw your penis. O.o Oh well, either way, welcome to FML. Nice to very personally meet you. ;P Ballsy pic btw. Kudos for that. :p
Raccoo 10
If I were you, I would have thrown your cat at his face right then and there when he said he was breaking up with you, OP. Perhaps that's not a very good idea, but oh well. He seems like a jerk very deserving of that. Sorry about the breakup. =(
cristinaaa 1
You should dump the vacuum filter on him.
BigBen31_fml 0
What a jerk off
march_17 0
Did you throw the cat at him?
disney_blonde 16
You have a clean house and he broke up with you in person rather than text or phone. What's the problem?