Today, I was pooping at a local Target when I heard someone say, "You need to eat more solids, you're pooping like a rabbit." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I used the restroom at a department store. While I was in my stall, I overheard a little girl say to her mother, "I see someone wearing pink!" I remembered that I was wearing pink just as she finished her thought, "…and she's pooping." She was peeking at me through the stall. FML
Today, I was walking around in Target with my friends and the guy I've liked for a long time. As we approached the patio section, I sat down on a chair only to hear a big wet watery sound. I got up and realized that I had just sat in some little kid's diarrhea. FML
Today, my boss overheard me singing, "I need a shit, I need a shit" on my way to the bathroom. FML
Today, while at a rest stop, I heard a woman in the stall next to me answer her phone and say to the other person, "Oh nothing just pooping and shit." FML
Today, I was pooping in a public toilet and a kid had walked in on me. I then heard him tell his dad, "It's okay, I didn't see anything, he was fat so his chubby legs hid it." FML
Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year-old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML
Today, while at a family get together, my bowels suddenly decided they needed to be emptied. Straight away. I felt bad enough using someone else's bathroom for this, but later, my sister came in and loudly said "God, Brian, what the hell have you been eating?" in front of everyone at the get together. FML
Today, I went grocery shopping with my 4-year-old after having some major bathroom issues. As I walked over to get bananas, she yelled out in the middle of the produce section, "DO YOU STILL HAVE DIARRHEA MOMMY?!" FML
Today, my friend and I were having a conversation in the ladies’ room. Suddenly, we hear banging from one of the stalls and, “Can you talk somewhere else? Some of us are trying to poop.” FML
Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML
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Top comments
cryskuni 5
I have always wondered how people can poop in public, because I have the fear someone will hear and make a comment like that.
glittertwat 10
You should take their advice.
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Comments (115)
glittertwat 10
You should take their advice.
KjoeLjan 4
Agreed. You can tell a lot about somebody's health just by looking at their stool.
CallMeMcFeelii 14
I don't think they saw it, I think they heard it. Which is actually more disgusting to me. I mean poop is poop. But hearing someone shit would be so nasty.
Calyx_fml 22
But I did see it. I had a wireless camera in the bowl; making videos for 4chan. It looked, sounded and smelled like rabbit poop.
awkward_gothlady 32
You have a camera that can transmit smells? Now that's some advanced technology!
s15c 9
#10- Wasn't there a song on the musical episode of Scrubs about that?
pittyfinny 4
Off topic, your name is glittertwat and your 16. What the hell is wrong with you kids these days?
WafflebotO_O 4
Whoa yea, that's messed o.o When I absolutely have to go #2 in a public washroom, I make my huge nest of toilet paper on the seat, and then throw some in, you know, as a silencer. Try it :p
DanielleinDC 34
Haven't you heard of Smellovision? At any rate, it's pretty rude to comment on what someone in the nest stall is doing. Sure some nasty shit can go down in a bathroom, but the polite thing to do is ignore the noises someone else is making.
maltam123 0
"Everything comes down to poop my head hurts Check the poop! I feel sick Cheek the poop! I was shot! Check the poop!"
cryskuni 5
I have always wondered how people can poop in public, because I have the fear someone will hear and make a comment like that.
Lexi_princess 3
Me too Ill hold it even if I really have to go
theannak 7
You can always tell em' to shut there mouths because youre a badass ************ who will rip their frikkin eyes out. :) nah im just kiddin :) just pull out your pocket knife, stay quiet but look em in the eye, an keep walkin. (this is if theyre waitin for ya) :P
yahoowizard 16
I feel it's weirder sitting there imagining what the quiet people in the stall next you might be thinking
A7X_LoVeee 10
Sometimes you just have to go. If this ever happens to me then I usually just wait for the restroom to be empty or do a sneaky drop off when someone flushes the toilet or uses those hand dryers.
kiwienne 21
I've done it twice. First time at an amusement park, where people were using the hand dryer all the time and brought lots of screaming kids inside. Second time at an airport that was deserted, because I took the last flight. ^That's how much it takes for me to be able to go, and I only did it because my tummy hurt the first time and second time I had a 6 hours trip ahead of me. I'll be screwed one day :{
shawnaishere 14
This reminds me of when my friends walked into the bathroom and heard a loud fart. We all laughed out loud and the girl heard us. We saw her when she came out and it was so awkward. Since we go to the same school I always remember that incident when I see her.
kiwienne 21
#29 - Poor girl! I bet that's high on her "most-embarassing-moments"-list! I would've kept the door locked until everything was clear, for sure. Even if I had to sit in there all day :D
HairyPunisher 27
9, call me crazy but you could just IGNORE them.
Braxton_84 3
some people have no boundaries .. who tells a stranger something like that? weirdo.
sens3sfailing 25
I once went to a bathroom to use the urinal and had listen to a older teenager ( would guess around 16 to 18) sing about his poop the entire time and grunt loudly so everyone could hear
RadioDeeJayy_ 6
Haha this is random but I love your display picture! Big bang daebak! ~
xcarxcrashx 9
What's the worst that can happen if someone does say something?
DerpyDerper 7
I was going to say the exact same thing! :P big bang rules.
NostalgiaFreak9 43
I remember back in middle school, I took a shit, and this asshole walked in, recognized me, and started kicking the stall door. Luckily, the door didn't break down. This is why I hate using public bathrooms.
AKiDNamedJoHn 12
Well maybe you need to eat more solids
COOL__Coal 12
YDI you should eat more solids.
legitkitty 11
Hell, maybe OP is half rabbit!
CastielJ 6
Rabbits? I like Turtles.
MelTheGreat 23
I actually understand your reference. Lol
Nbackus9 4
I don't
soad2014 7
Your reference is bad and you should feel bad!
waitwhatsgoingon 18
What the ***** wrong with your hair?
suicidehacker21 8
What the **** is wrong with your skin at 109 post
Lexi_princess 3
It's best just to ignore that person when your getting out of the stall.
taera 8
Awkward penguin.
KiRaKaT 9
Awkward rabbit
Ilovefutbol 8
A rabbit? Maybe a pigeon!
larouche362 10
You dont know the difference between rabbit poop and bird poop? The OP was probably plopping every few seconds..
Ilovefutbol 8
Calm down, I know the difference, it's just the fml said "You need to eat more solids" so I just thought of a pigeon, keep calm!
larouche362 10
It's not like im swearing my butt off like some people on here .. I was just stating a fact.
Ilovefutbol 8
Well you didn't need to ask me the difference between the two, it just came out as rude to me.
JubileeBee 31
Am I the only one thinking of Olan Rodgers's video?
SilverInGray 25
Ghost in the stalls!
bitchwhore 20
I AM THE MASTER COMMANDER
ihasbrains 10
It's a Monday.
RS795 8
He must've released the kraken.
elephantsarecute 16
It's ok, OP. The person who listens and gives advice to other people in public restrooms has problems, not you.
YourLifeSucks132 3
But the OP never said he was in the restroom!
Prolux_fml 23
#16- You're the perfect example that common sense is not that common...
WearingHats 14
#21 You must not go to Target very often.
ShyAnn29 15
16 is technically right, OP never actually SAID he/she was in the restroom, but it's obvious he/she was.
coughyochick 7
#35- trust me, people do weird stuff now
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10
This FML just got more entertaining now that I'm imagining OP squating down in an isle doing his business.
ShyAnn29 15
Maybe OP was looking at some electronics, when all of a sudden he had to poop, so instead of running all the way across the store to the restrooms, he just pulled down his pants, then he squat and went poop right in the isle. *I'm guessing OP is a he, I'm probably wrong though*
kooochris1995 14
The name is Lauren Marie. ^
Ozuru 11
At least you were able to poop :D they prob. were jealous butthurts.