Today, my boyfriend didn't come home from a night of drinking with the boys again, so I told him that I was packing my things and I wouldn't be here when he came home. After all my things were packed, I realized he drove my car to the bar. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend called me as I was getting ready for bed and asked me to pick him up from the bar. Being a loving girlfriend I drive the 45 minutes; when I get there his friend informs me he left about 45 minutes ago. FML
Today, I went to a New Year's party with my boyfriend. Later into the night, he got drunk, and left me there to go to another party with his friends. I have no car, and no way to get home. FML
Today, I came home early, and my boyfriend's car was in my driveway. Inside, he was talking to my parents. He walked right past me and left. My mother then says, "He wanted me to tell you it's over." FML
Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my parents over dinner. During the meal, he excused himself to the bathroom, and when he didn't come back after a few minutes, I went to check up on him. I ended up finding him in the living room, pocketing a pack of ambien from my mom's bag. FML
Today, after a short trip out of town, I came back late at night to the yard clean, the house swept and mopped, all the laundry done, and my son asleep. I was thrilled with my boyfriend, until I found him passed out, covered in spilled beer and piss. FML
Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be a good idea to break up with me in his car. I had to walk home. FML
Today, I got into a huge fight with my boyfriend after driving 200 miles to see him. While arguing, I told him I never wanted to see him again and left after slamming the front door. I left my car keys in his kitchen. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house so that he could break up with me. I went out to my car to leave only to discover that all of the wheels had been stolen. Even the spare. I had to spend the rest of the day with my ex-boyfriend finding a way to get my car home. FML
Today, I let my boyfriend drive my car, knowing that he doesn't have a license. While he was out, he ran a stop sign, collided with another vehicle, and then left the scene of the accident. Then he lied to me about how the accident happened so I "wouldn't be so upset." FML
Today, I volunteered to be my brother's designated driver. I told him throughout the night that I wasn't drinking, but he ended up leaving me at the bar and going to his friend's house in a cab for more drinks, taking my keys along with him. FML
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Top comments
annamg 0
How can you all assume that she's a controlling bitch? You can't just do whatever the hell you want in a relationship; there has to be compromise. If he wants to party and drink and spend every night away from home, why does he have a girlfriend? It's obvious that this isn't the same as just "hanging with the boys."
judgingyou09 0
ooooh bummer. kinda wrecks the oomph factor but at least now he has to watch you leave =)
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Comments (95)
blalien 0
You can always move out after he comes home.
xxorganizedmess 0
That would be an epic win. Girl:"Oh, hi." Guy: "Hi." Girl:"I'm moving out. Bye." -leaves- Guy: "WTF just happened???"
123sploosh 0
but it isnt as......intense as if he came home to see her gone, you see?
selenes 0
#14 fail. that is not a funny scenario.
wbrycem 0
Today, I realised by boyfriend isn't pussy whipped. FML
slasher29 0
18 yeah in a way its sad but a little funny but anyway, what you need to do is call a taxi or something to the bar, ask to "borrow" his keys for a sec, and then explain the situation
bovice 0
you probably dont give him enough space. which is why he goes to bars and doesnt stay whipped like #58 said. theres no way you didnt deserve this. leave this guy it will do him a favor
missmeliss0309 0
But how did she tell him she was moving out if he wasn't home? I call fake.
lovesux2013 0
hey #64 ever considered it's not her fault. maybe he's a alcoholic and needs to grow up. maybe she told him to stop being so irresponsible. don't blame it on her immedialty.
taz94 0
hA ha bitch
ilovefatcats 12
just take his car then jeez :P not that hard
ThatGuyWithHair 0
#77 There's these this called phones. Idiot.
thethingthatshou 4
or she could stop being a bitch
laughtersplay 14
Can't.. Help.. it *wouldn't for the Fml's misspelling
King_Nero 15
82- I agree that you can't blame op here but when she decides she's leaving him before even calling then that's not any better. For all you know he could have had something bad happen and couldn't get home on time. Things like that do happen.
judgingyou09 0
ooooh bummer. kinda wrecks the oomph factor but at least now he has to watch you leave =)
andlifesuxagain 0
How dare you want your bf to drive after a night of drinking! You cant get in betweem the other mates friends.. silly woman. Why is beer better than a woman? Because beer does not get jealous when you pick up another.
XOfiestypixie 0
Since you have to wait for him, throw his stuff all over the yard? =D
wingedspiritus 0
Um, no.
thebigone_fml 0
why be a bitch?
XOfiestypixie 0
it's just fun? If his drinking is THAT much of a problem that she's leaving him, then I think she has the privilege to do so. However, I don't know if he really has a drinking problem, or if she's just overreacting.
dramatized423 0
take his car...
zrhcrx 0
no she should have just reported her car stolen...
J352SAURUS 30
If he had a car, I'm sure he would've driven it to the bar...
shootingstar8D 0
He better pick you up and take your ass to where ever you need to go lol
FordPrefect 0
Don't throw his stuff in the yard, that's trashy. Unless he raped your family or something. Just leave.
ananamoose 0
yea because if he raped her family a good thing to show him your mad would be hey I'm going to throw your clothes out on the lawn, I could take you to court and you would go to jail for awhile for RAPING MY FAMILY, but no the whole clothes thing I think lets him know your really upset. Idiot
FordPrefect 0
I honestly did not think anyone would be stupid enough to take that statement literally. Thanks for proving me wrong.
ananamoose 0
Think about what you said for two seconds
asmadasrabbits 0
so call a friend and have them pick you up. then come back to get your car later.
The_Cait 0
Use his credit card to take a cab to the bar and take your car?
anonacs 0
He's not allowed to go out and drink and then safely not drive home? Wow, you're a ******* bitch, hes better off without a controlling gf anyway.
LololololZebra 0
Wow, get the ******* stick out of your ass. You have no right to just call someone a bitch when you don't even know the story; FML only gives 300 characters-not alot of room to tell a story, there could be more to it than this. And besides, I think she has every right to leave, I wouldn't want some Boyfriend that gets drunk and doesn't come home until way later, that doesn't make me controlling. Jesus Christ.
Strike1 0
Not really #22. She could've easily said: "another night of drinking and sex" without going over the limit. Not letting your bf do what he wants short of cheating is being controlling. You'd rather have a boyfriend that gets drunk and then drives home drunk rather than one that waits to sober up before coming home? That doesn't sound like a good judgement call to me.
GDinNJ 0
I'm going to have to agree with whoever opposed 22. Although I understand that one might become jealous or seriously concerned that their boyfriend is cheating on them, but making him drive home drunk? You do realize what that would do, correct? You're going to end up with a ton of good, faithful guys dead 'cause they actually did what their gf asked them to do. Any tool who's actually going to cheat on you PROBABLY wouldn't listen to your demands for him to drive home drunk. Unless he's an idiot, that is. However, ASKING him if he's gonna be home or not makes sense to me. I know guys get annoyed when their girlfriends try to "control" them, but have some common decency. The point of a relationship may be trust, but it wouldn't kill you to try to give your gf a heads up if you're gonna be home or not.
scorpioserpent 1
The worse part of it all is that he has her car...so there goes any chance of her going out. What a douche.
PoeticPixie 0
so as long as he's not having sex with another girl, he should be allowed to do whatever he wants, even if it upsets his girlfriend? i pity your girlfriend. relationships are about compromise, and the fact that the OP said he didn't come home after a night of drinking AGAIN, this seems like a regular occurrence. If all he wants is to go out and drink with his friends, he doesn't need a girlfriend, he needs his friends and a one night stand. The OP wasn't being controlling, she was being reasonable
LifeFucksUsAll 0
I'd rather have a Boyfriend that doesn't drink at all. There are those kind of men out there.
__nines 13
Yes I agree that he shouldn't drive home drunk, but why would he drive if he knew he was going to drink? There's a DD for a reason. We also don't know if he called or not and communication is a big deal in a relationship. We also don't know if this was a regular thing too which is what it kind of sounds like.