Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He said it was because my mom's lazy eye creeps him out, and that my dad hates him. She doesn't have a lazy eye, he's never met my dad, never seen my mom, and now according to his friends, he's been cheating on me for the past two weeks. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, and ever since I was born, I've had a lazy eye. This morning my boyfriend broke up with me. He thought it was funny to state that we just weren't looking at life in the same way. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because apparently my mom hates him and doesn't want us to be together. My mom died six years ago. FML
Today, my boyfriend of two years broke up with me. Why? He said his mom didn't want us together anymore. His mom died three years ago. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. Apparently, he spoke with my mom and the fact that she wants me dead is a huge red flag. FML
Today, my boyfriend just told me that his mom told him to break up with me, and that she would pay him to do it. His mom is a bitch. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he wasn't feeling our two-month relationship was up to par with his parents' 30-year marriage, and, furthermore, I wasn't similar enough to his mother. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. How? He invited my mother to his house for coffee with his parents, and told her. She then had to come home and tell me I’d been dumped. FML
Today, my boyfriend met my mom and started acting strange. Then my dad came in and was instantly furious. Apparently, my boyfriend is the guy my mom cheated with that caused my parent's divorce. He’s 3 years younger than I am. Gross mom, just gross. Also I’m single again, damn it. FML
Today, my dad made me and my boyfriend break up. Not because he was a bad influence, but because I was. FML
Today, I brought my boyfriend of 2 weeks home to meet my mom and she started talking about how she really wants a lot of grand-kids. He called 2 hours later and broke up with me. FML
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Top comments
emeraldisle 30
He's just making excuses to break up with you. You're better off without him OP.
zoPwNAgEzo 21
I don't understand, did he not at least try to come up with an ACTUAL reason to dump you? At least you don't have to deal with that douche anymore
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Comments (155)
Davick 0
one word for you ex "douchbag"
JustOneMinute 2
He probably broke up with the wrong girlfriend. Maybe the girl he was cheating on you with had a mom with a lazy eye
Ice_King 0
He sounds crazy to me
kitchmoski22 0
you just nasty gurl
noisebox 1
How could you even date a retard. He sound like the type that picks his and eats it when nobody's looking.....
ImDB8 0
Lol what If he broke up with the wrong girl, and unwittingly stayed with the girl whos mom had a lazy eye
megan1245613 0
It just a reason to break up with you
charliewhippet 9
Sounds like you dodged a bullet - he's an asshole.
littlecuntcats 6
He's probably telling you about the other girl's parents.
RedCrow 0
That's why I stick with my batman action figures, they'll never leave me *sound of heavy breathing* Haah, Haaaaahh-mmmmm...