Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He said it was because my mom's lazy eye creeps him out, and that my dad hates him. She doesn't have a lazy eye, he's never met my dad, never seen my mom, and now according to his friends, he's been cheating on me for the past two weeks. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, and ever since I was born, I've had a lazy eye. This morning my boyfriend broke up with me. He thought it was funny to state that we just weren't looking at life in the same way. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because apparently my mom hates him and doesn't want us to be together. My mom died six years ago. FML
Today, my boyfriend of two years broke up with me. Why? He said his mom didn't want us together anymore. His mom died three years ago. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. Apparently, he spoke with my mom and the fact that she wants me dead is a huge red flag. FML
Today, my boyfriend just told me that his mom told him to break up with me, and that she would pay him to do it. His mom is a bitch. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he wasn't feeling our two-month relationship was up to par with his parents' 30-year marriage, and, furthermore, I wasn't similar enough to his mother. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. How? He invited my mother to his house for coffee with his parents, and told her. She then had to come home and tell me I’d been dumped. FML
Today, my boyfriend met my mom and started acting strange. Then my dad came in and was instantly furious. Apparently, my boyfriend is the guy my mom cheated with that caused my parent's divorce. He’s 3 years younger than I am. Gross mom, just gross. Also I’m single again, damn it. FML
Today, my dad made me and my boyfriend break up. Not because he was a bad influence, but because I was. FML
Today, I brought my boyfriend of 2 weeks home to meet my mom and she started talking about how she really wants a lot of grand-kids. He called 2 hours later and broke up with me. FML
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Top comments
emeraldisle 30
He's just making excuses to break up with you. You're better off without him OP.
zoPwNAgEzo 21
I don't understand, did he not at least try to come up with an ACTUAL reason to dump you? At least you don't have to deal with that douche anymore
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Comments (155)
Acaprice14 9
He's been cheating on you with your mom for two weeks, then your Dad found out, and now your dad hates him. Makes sense now!
BlackHarry 0
You were lucky. Should have commented that his Dad has a small penis like him. Lol You are better off.
alissa222 15
You're so awesome he couldn't find an actual reason to break up.
pogue36 5
And you've only dated for two weeks...
MissAmz 7
No, he's been cheating on her for the past two weeks.
2RaRa25 6
I would say good riddance to that, and since he sounds like an idiot, maybe go get yourself checked out. I'm assuming brainiac may have been too dumb to use protection as well.
Arrawyn 12
He's a smart one, breaking up with the wrong girl, it's like bringing in the wrong pet to get put down
dellis44 7
maybe he meant to break up with the other girl... either way he's in quite a pickle.
challan 19
How cute is it that you said in a pickle? My grandfather always says that. ;)
Snafuusmc 12
Sri Lanka? You are kinda far from me. In the end I hope you kick his ass to the curb.
Lesbian4life 0
This is why I am a lesbian. Guys are pricks
jquiggy89 3
My god....there was a comment from a lesbian chick here two seconds ago generalizing all men as pricks. She must have been thumbed down into the abyss!