Today, my boyfriend and I took a nap, fully clothed. I woke up to him panicking. He'd had a wet dream and was scared that his sperm somehow swam through several layers of clothing and got me pregnant. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got out of bed and went to the bathroom. At least, I thought I did, until I woke up to my pants, sheets, and boyfriend all soaking wet. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to initiate sex with me in my sleep. He confessed to thinking that if he did it lightly enough, I'd think I was just dreaming. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I've missed my period, and that I think I might be pregnant. He started panicking and ended up puking in the toilet. FML
Today, I went down on my boyfriend while he was drunk, and he told me to get protection from his bedroom. I came back, he was passed out on the couch. His parents then came into the room after hearing noises. I was sitting there naked holding a condom while he was fast asleep. FML
Today, I was watching a movie with my new boyfriend. I got tired so I thought it would be cute to fall asleep on him. He woke me up and said, "You got me wet." Thinking it was a joke, I said smoothly, "That's what she said!" He replied "No, really." I looked down, I'd drooled all over his shirt. FML
Today, I woke up after a really intense wet dream. Problem is, I'd fallen asleep in the living room. My little brother saw the whole thing. Now he's going around telling family I need to get some. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML
Today, my boyfriend's mother walked in on us having sex. He started crying and ran into the bathroom where my clothes were located, leaving me to deal with his mother. Naked. FML
Today, I was taking a shower when my boyfriend suddenly hopped in with me. We were getting a little frisky when my mom's hand unexpectedly came through the curtain, dropped a condom on the bottom of the shower, all the while saying, "Keep it safe kids!" FML
Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML
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Top comments
rgri 11
Try to convince him to wear a condom everytime he takes a nap, just to be safe.
ipierson 5
This is the dumbest thing I've ever heard.
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Comments (127)
bakingqueen 7
please tell me ya'll are still in grade school... because if not he needs to go back and get schooled!
ashjo 12
seven layers of clothing, ya'll cold?
MzZombicidal 36
Several... Not seven.
Sports_guy3 28
seven could mean several, you know.
timss4 19
Several generally refers to 5 or more in quantity, 7 is a likely number or several lol just sayin
joeyl2008 29
The definition of several is "more than 2; less thas than many"
jloko16 11
Was it his first wet dream ever? And did he fall asleep while watching Teletubbies?
ninjuh_wingman 29
I'm not sure if you're insinuating that the boyfriend is a really young or that the boyfriend had a wet dream about the Teletubbies.
luckyone365 7
32: ¿Por que no los dos?
karlcolt45 19
solid logic
shhhaaarrron 12
What the... Reassure him that that's not possible... Or mess with him lol
klutz44 28
Yes, tell him you can already feel the baby kicking.
Fernando83 19
Play along and tell him you need the morning after pill. Have him go to the pharmacy and explain why he needs it, Lmao.
foxy_grampa 19
Let's hope not because any person who can come up with something that dumb shouldn't reproduce
sabrinalynn22 19
Looks like someone needs to go back to sex ed.
olpally 33
Please don't have sex with him. My god. Smh, can't believe how stupid and idiotic people can be.
Opie_Winston 7
Please read #25. Unreal