Today, me and my boyfriend had some crazy rough sex. In the process I ended up with huge bruises and bite marks all over my neck and chest. I'm giving a speech on domestic violence today. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate in an alley. He pushed me up against a wall and started kissing me, but he pushed me so hard I cut open my head and needed 10 stitches. FML
Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML
Today, I had to explain to my mom that the bruises I have all over my body are not due to abuse, but because I'm into really rough sex. FML
Today, I realized I might have some issues. After some amazing, satisfying rough sex, I started having incredible pain. I went to the hospital and discovered I'd asked him to beat me so hard that he'd cracked a rib. FML
Today, my boyfriend thought it would be sexy to pick me up and throw me on the bed. I rolled off and broke my collarbone. FML
Today, I broke my boyfriend's nose trying to pop his blackheads. His leg jerked in shock, kicked my leg, and I fell, breaking the mirror, cutting myself, and slamming into the bathroom sink. I woke up in the hospital, with over a hundred stitches, and my poor boyfriend in jail for suspected domestic abuse. FML
Today, while making love to my wife, I felt adventurous and told her to hit me. She didn't so much as hesitate before savagely slapping me with her ring hand. Now I'm back home from the hospital, with stitches closing up a huge gash on my cheek. FML
Today, while I was out walking with my girlfriend, I got beaten up and called an "abuser" by a gang of women who noticed bruises on my girlfriend's arms and legs. The bruises are from her karate class. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. I got a little too enthusiastic during it, and wound up cracking my neck loudly, and had to stop while the pain settled down. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when I lifted myself up a little bit. What I was not prepared for was my boyfriend leaning down to kiss my neck. We collided heads, hard. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
stephfml 0
Wear a turtleneck
TEAZO 0
shouldn't of had rough sex before your speech XD
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (179)
stephfml 0
Wear a turtleneck
BlueJeans2626 0
oh shit
hellokittywhore 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I now wish my bf was here I want some rough kinky sexxx right bow so bad and you made it worse. thanks. and the biting!! OMG MOAN!!!!
troyboyd05 0
What the **** is goin on with Hellokittywhore? Oh wait...her name explains all....
Mizzle95 0
okay crazy woman what. the. F**k.
Lazcouchtater 4
My GF at the moment is into that. She's slowly bringing me around to the idea, however, if she bites hard enough to make me what to yell or punch, I'll just clamp down on the nearest soft flesh near me. Strangely enough, thats enough to make her let go, and almost ******. Go figure. Two birds killed with one stone lol
ninjawurl16 0
hahaha i wanna be yur boyfriend(:
KataraTheBender 0
Yes and make- up on whatever isn't covered
changesinme 0
Rough sex? You mean crazy monkey sex?
iloveshim 14
And some covergirl
xxDefiantxx 0
The best time to wear a striped turtleneck,is all the time...
SofiaFaolan 8
No, she should wear her usual clothes and then make it part of her presentation as an example of what physical domestic violence can look like, then claim that it's costume makeup for the speech to anyone who asks.
Kazze 31
#162 "The best time to wear a striped sweater, is all the tiiiiime. The best kind of striped sweater? Turtleneck, that's the kiiiiiind." I'm happy and disappointed in myself for knowing that by heart.
xyris_fml 28
Or use tattoo concealer. It can be your friend for things like this.
TEAZO 0
shouldn't of had rough sex before your speech XD
Jbiebs82 0
U feel off ur bike?
Kazze 31
#125 I hate it when I feel off my bike.
SillySweetGirl 18
Have*. You shouldn't HAVE had it. Not of.
Danny_Shakes 0
Nothing like a night of drinking and waking up the next morning with a black eye and your dick in a cast. Turning to your girlfriend and she looks like she was on Cops the night before. If that is not true love than what is? haha
_hotdamn 0
Yuuum.
Blehstefany 0
#1 AGREED. Lol, it works. If you don't have any turtlenecks... Goodluck with that!
xXCHAINEDXx 0
lol #5 u look like the guy from white chicks
never_accepted 0
lol #3
tanmandown 0
Irony is a beautiful thing... Unless you're the OP, of course.
generalsmith 0
don't have premarital sex you disgusting piece of filth! i hope you fall upon your privates rendering them unworkable!
ohhboyy 0
welll thats ironic
Kassad_fml 0
tasty.. :P