Today, like every other day my boyfriend and I try and have sex, his dog cried and whined outside of his room until we stopped. She does this all the time and it kills the mood instantly. I can't have sex because of a toy poodle. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my dog is much too fond of barking at me loudly and at length for no reason. So is my girlfriend. FML
Today, my girlfriend canceled our date I've been looking forward to all week because her dog was having puppies. She doesn't have a dog. FML
Today, my dog was watching me and started to have a hard-on, for half an hour. FML
Today, I was arguing with my girlfriend when my dog brought me a squeaky toy and tried shoving it into my hand so I could throw it for him. Out of habit, I grabbed it, but then it squeaked every time I tried to make a serious point. FML
Today, my dog played dead just so I would leave him alone. FML
Today, I found out that sometimes when my girlfriend is mad at me she will allow our unfixed male dog to jack off on my pillows when I'm at work. She won the battle and the war. FML
Today, my fiancé decided he wants a baby only because our dog is good, quiet, and falls asleep as soon as he starts to cradle her. He thinks a baby will be just like that. FML
Today, and like every day before it, my boyfriend’s snoring is keeping me up all night. FML
Today, my boyfriend kicked me out of bed so the dog could get under the covers. FML
Today, my boyfriend said he was too tired to have sex with me because he'd spent the whole day jerking off. FML
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Top comments
19jburner 15
Boop the snoot.
BloodyBrilliant 15
Buy a male dog. She needs her dude too.
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Comments (67)
jsburn 4
Right there with you, and Ive had this dog for 6 years. it doesn't her any easier.
LadyTyger51ne 8
Turn some music on and drown her out
megnifique 14
Your place?
petert71 10
Our dog likes to watch... You either get over it, or go celebate.
Benderama 8
That dog would be gone so fast
YAMICHA 2
Sounds like you got a girl friend to me!
videogames4life 10
Maybe she feels lonely. Buy another dog?
jagott2 8
Sounds like one of those abstinence-only dogs.
FunSize85 6
your boyfriend has a toy poodle???
thesinglelife 5
My cat does that to me...except he likes to get in the middle of us. Ever had your boyfriend scream like a girl cuz your cat clawed his dick as a suprise? not good!