Today, my girlfriend canceled our date I've been looking forward to all week because her dog was having puppies. She doesn't have a dog. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because her dog "told her to". FML
Today, I texted my girlfriend to tell her that we couldn't hang out because my dog died this morning and we were burying him. She replied that she wasn't going to get stood up by a stupid dog. She then broke up with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me over the phone, after having left me to look after her dog while she went on a 2-week vacation with her family. Now I have to choose between paying for a kennel for her damn dog or taking care of it every day until she gets back. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because her mom said she would buy her a pug if she did. I got dumped for a dog, and an ugly one for that matter. FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to talk. She just got back from a small vacation, and she'd asked me to feed her dogs while she was gone, so I did. I even stayed with them at times so they wouldn't get lonely. My girlfriend had come over to break up with me. She didn't do so earlier because she needed her dogs fed. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I cancelled our date tonight. I cancelled because I had a seizure and was taken to the hospital. FML
Today, my girlfriend of a couple of months texted me that she was very sad because her puppy had just passed away. Feeling sorry for her, I bought her another puppy of the same breed. I wrapped it in a blanket and placed it on the passenger seat and went to pick her up from school. She sat on it. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I didn't attend her dog's funeral, and was therefore an insensitive bastard. I couldn't attend because my mum has cancer and I was driving her to a hospital appointment. FML
Today, my manager made me stay at work for an extra four hours, making me miss an urgent specialist appointment I'd scheduled months ago. Why? Because her neighbor's dog was having puppies, and she wanted to go home early and see them. FML
Today, my girlfriend whom I'm crazy about broke up with me out of the blue. After pleading with her unsuccessfully, I called my mom for comfort and advice. She informed me that my dog had died. FML
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Top comments
liindsey 25
Well hopefully you confronted her.
anjyu22 0
Uh, are you sure? That sounds like a pretty outrageous, not to mention easily disproven excuse to just invent.
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Comments (60)
liindsey 25
Well hopefully you confronted her.
quirinus 0
YDI for not having a girlfriend
Unregistered 0
I just LOVE middle school relationships they think just because they ask a girl out on a date it equals having a girlfriend, the OP is obviously about 10 years old honestly what were you going to do on this date? Show her your red engine fire truck and watch dora the explorer?
AnaMaree 0
Are you sure, OP? Maybe you should pay more attention to your girlfriend. You're the dog!!!!! *foams at mouth*
brutallyhonest24 0
ask when you can see the puppies =D
happyhak 5
WELL GET HER A DOG FOOL!
anjyu22 0
Uh, are you sure? That sounds like a pretty outrageous, not to mention easily disproven excuse to just invent.
happyhak 5
Eh, it was the first thing that came up in my head...OP, you should just come over to drop off a gift for her "sick dog" and see what happens! :)
happyhak 5
Oops sorry i meant "pregnant dog" not "sick dog"
flashback.miss 28
well she wasnt totally wrong.. she does have one bitch... she just needs to look in the mirror... You ain't nothin' but a hound dog cryin' all the time. You ain't nothin' but a hound dog cryin' all the time. Well, you ain't never caught a rabbit and you ain't no friend of mine. When they said you was high classed, well, that was just a lie. When they said you was high classed, well, that was just a lie. You ain't never caught a rabbit and you ain't no friend of mine.
Unregistered 0
stfu stop trying to copy ireplywlyrics he was the original ****** but now your just ripping him off so that makes you a sub-level below his faggotness
AtoZnumbersand_ 1
You're probably wrong, She most likely does have a dog. It would be easy enough to say she was sick or had to do something with her family. Why would she make up such an unbelievable thing? Has she actually told you straight out she does not have a dog? or no pets? Because if you just assumed because she's never mentioned it before, then that's just silly.
LilaBear 2
"Today, I had to cancel a date with my bf because my dog was having puppies. He didn't believe me coz he'd forgotten I have a dog. FML." haha. Kidding. Are you sure it was her dog and not, like, her family's dog or something that she might have been looking after? I don't think she'd make up something like that. If I was trying to get out of a date with someone who knew me well enough to know I don't have a dog, I'd say something like I'd gotten sick, or that the computer had eaten my assignment that I had to re-write, or that my parents wanted me to look after a younger sibling... or something similar... a bit more believable than making up a pet.
snafu57 1
tell her you'll be right over to share this experience with her.
Anteezy 7
Let me guess you went out on 1-2 dates and now you think you have a gf.
GodOfBeer 5
or worse they "dated " via facebook...:o
BritishHobo 0
That's all it is though, a guess. For all you know, they've been dating for seven months and he knows that she's never ever had a dog because she's allergic to their fur.