Today, it's my 18th birthday. I was telling my friends a story when my mom started talking. I simply said 'Mom...' so she'd realize she interrupted me. She gave me the finger and called me rude in front of all my friends. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Isn't it ironic, don't you think?
Today, my mom complained that I was being too loud, and she smacked my head really hard. All while screaming at me. FML
Ignore! Ignore!
Today, I was at a job interview when my phone started ringing. It was my mom, so I quickly hit "Ignore", which was probably for the best since she was obviously drunk. She left a voicemail in which she sang "Happy Birthday" to me. It's not my birthday. FML
Alanis Morissette reference
Today, my mom screamed at me to the point of tears, because it rained on her birthday. FML
Today, in front of the entire family, I yelled at my mom and told her she wasn't a good parent. She responded with, "Well, at least I had friends when I was your age." FML
Today, my mom bitched me out in front of my friends because I had my first kiss at "such a young age". She's 15 years older than me. FML
Dumpy baby
Today, on my birthday, my mother described my birth like a large, painful bowel movement in front of all my friends. FML
Today, it's my mom's birthday. I woke up at midnight to be the first to tell her happy birthday. When I awoke in the morning, I decided to bake her a cake. Little did I know my whole family was going out to lunch to celebrate. I wasn't invited. FML
Today, I got yelled at by my mom for not being surprised enough at my surprise birthday party. She'd told me about it while drunk the night before. FML
The R-word
Today, I had to listen to my mother painstakingly spell out to me why broken glass is extremely dangerous. Feeling insulted, I jokingly asked her if she thought I was "retarded". I then got yelled at for "swearing." I'm a fucking adult, but my overprotective and condescending mother seems to think otherwise. FML
Today, I missed a call from my mom. It's my birthday, and glad she remembered, I called back to thank her. She was surprised when I brought up going out for dinner, and asked me what the occasion was. FML
Top comments
angelfaced59 0
haha that sounds like my mom haha
hahaiseeyou 0
you should have a little talk with your mother
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Comments (164)
reallymily 0
she seems nice..
Geiko_fml 0
That's an awesome mom. I'd just give her the finger back and tell her to **** herself.
xxJORDISxx_fml 4
you turned 18 eh well at Least she didn't kick you out
Xx_jESSii 3
Sounds like my mom but instead of calling me rude she probly would have said shut the f*ck up lol oh & Happy birthday Op !
leonieNL 0
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leonieNL 0
I'm the OP on this one :) Just to clear things up, I did not interrupt my mom after she did it to me, she simply told me to go get my guests a drink. I said 'mom' after she was done. The reason I mentioned it was my birthday is because that's the reason my friends (and some family members, I know, awesome experience) were there. Thanks to the ones wishing me a happy birthday :) I'm just glad it's done, I never liked birthdays. P.S. Don't worry, my mom's not a bitch, she's just a little edgy sometimes.
fawfulster 11
OP What kind of batshit insane world do you live where getting the finger is fun?
leonieNL 0
I was being sarcastic.
leannpaige 0
happy birthday! :)
MikeyyyyLover 0
that sucks
erwinbear 0
hahaha this sounds a lot like my mom.
storybook17 0
happpy birthday(: