Today, my daughter told me that she liked her "other daddy" better. I don't know who's she talking about, but my wife is doing a good job telling her to be quiet. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, as I was taking my three year-old daughter home from daycare, she asked where her daddy was. I tried to tell her that I was her father, but she answered, "No, not you! My other daddy!" I've got some talking to do tonight. FML
Today, my 5 year-old informed me she likes her "other mummy" more and wants to live with her instead. I need to have a long conversation with my husband. FML
Today, I explained to my 5 year old daughter that her older sister from my husband's first marriage lives with her mommy, and my daughter lives with us. She exclaimed, "It's not fair! I want two mommies like she has! Can we swap, I like her mommy better than you anyway!" FML
Today, as I was picking up my 7 year-old daughter at my ex-husband's house, my daughter started crying saying that she wanted to stay with Daddy forever. I asked why. She said her stepmom was a better mommy. Apparently, the woman who broke up my marriage is now a better "Mommy." FML
Today, after spending time with my daughter and painting her nails she gives me a hug and says, "Mommy I love you, but I love daddy much better!" FML
Today, my 2-year-old daughter overheard my wife and I arguing and fixated on one particular insult my wife threw at me. Now my daughter won't stop saying "Daddy a numbnuts", always with a big smile on her face. FML
Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML
Today, my four-year-old daughter called me by her mom's new boyfriend's name. Three different times. FML
Today, my daughter asked me to braid her hair. When I was done, she said Daddy's girlfriend does it better. I wasn't aware we had an open marriage. FML
Today, my daughter ran up to a librarian working in the kids section and screamed "MOMMY!" and hugged her. She looked at her and said "I'm not your mommy." My daughters reply: "I know. But you're better than mommy" FML
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Top comments
mufasaniqqa 13
aw **** man, sorry about that.
MondRubberduck 24
That´s no problem. You know. Kids are easy to bribe.
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Comments (134)
mufasaniqqa 13
aw **** man, sorry about that.
IloveToLaugh143 21
Your wife is also doing a good job of making it obvious that she's cheating. Not as sly as she thought...
joseph19921992 10
Wow she must be cheating, sry OP! **** I'm a genius...
iSativa 24
We don't have to jump straight to cheating. Perhaps your daughter is confused on the definition of "dad" and considers other male figures in her life to also be her father.
Sabsnation 12
But then why would OP's wife try and quiet down the daughter so much?
brrarm 17
Actually kids do sometimes consider other caring male figures in their lives to be their dads. I when little did that to a friend if family. My mom would shush me down and later try to explain, because she didn't want my father to feel bad about my words.
Emiler98 11
Maybe it's like Coraline and she went to a parallel world
silencebabyy 23
maybe op isnt the real father and the mom let the daughter visit the "other daddy"
xXCamoArmyGurlxX 4
I don't know what you said but I like it!
MondRubberduck 24
That´s no problem. You know. Kids are easy to bribe.
91hayek 31
The kid is confused enough; they should leave her out of their dysfunctional relationship and talk about it like the adults they are supposed to be.
collegedream121 8
I hate to say this but due to our dysfunctional generation.. Get her at least a cell phone, iPad, and a Macbook air. No promises though.
toaster123 11
An iphone instead of "cell phone" would go better with the list of apple products you mentioned.
jack_jill05 14
the fact that the FML said "daddy", the kid probably said that randomly, and his wife has to tell her not say that, I would assume that the she's probably young and doesn't need any of those things. maybe just talking it out in private without her in the room. one other thing. why, if your cheating on your husband and your childs father, would you bring her along?
Oh_Really21 3
Down voted only because Apple products suck. Use Linux and Android.
RedPillSucks 33
@54 Most likely, because mom is a "Stay at home" mom, and the other man in question visits often, while the child is there.
Sigilwen 24
The kid said it, where do you get them dragging the kid into it? Maybe mommy needs keep her affair out of the kids life.
Sigilwen 24
Maybe she took her boy friend there when the husband was out.
JazNim17 18
54, although I think you're right and she is pretty young, I wanted to point out that using the word "daddy" for your dad does not necessarily mean the child is young. in some parts of the US kids call their father "daddy" forever. I'm 21 and I still say "daddy." My mom does the same with her dad. "Dad" actually sounds pretty impersonal to me. Just wanted to point that out.
v8nick97 11
He could be coming over to their house when OP is at work. A lot of wives are found cheating when husbands come home early.
HeManPc 5
Bribing a child with things such as a cellphone, ipad, ect. Is only contributing to the dysfunctional generation you're referring to, #30.
deepunder 17
Perhaps shes not even your daughter?
gjikvtj 18
Maury time
Earths_Venus 25
If you're sitting in the kitchen and you're feeling something itching... Yeah. She's cheating.
SmokinGuns 13
Dry skin.
toaster123 11
I don't get it. ;(
pirateshota 11
38 - She could have given him an STD, presumably from the person she's cheating on him with.
Redoxx_fml 22
Tell her you like your "other wife" better
KittenSandwich 9
Because that would solve everything....
MoodiQ 8
but his daughter told him not his wife
kalbrek009 20
Lol, don't you mean, "tell her you like her other mommy better"?
popprock 13
Probably would make things worse... Then the wife would have something to use against him. He'd say he was kidding or lying and then she would ask why he said it then. It just wouldn't end well....
dawood_k 27
I just have to ask... Whose your daddy?
imshadyxo 25
Is he rich like me?
mufasaniqqa 13
no, 86. no.
carabobara 7
#86 was quoting a song. "what's your name? who's your daddy? is he rich like me?" from the 70s, don't remember the artist or feel like googling it.
singer0421 32
*Who's
hplover32 19
def leopard...
zBLAKEz 23
Not that good of a job apparently.
kaylamarriee 10
I'm so sorry to hear that. Keep your head up. Hope it all works out for you.
DaMann360 19
I don't. He should greatly consider divorce because cheating is absolutely not okay. He can't trust her anymore and so on. He should do what he can to find the truth and then take any necessary actions.
kaylamarriee 10
I wasn't saying to not consider divorce if she was in fact cheating. I'm just saying that I hope everything works out for the best, whether it be divorce or they work it out. As long as he gets it figured out and does what's best for him.
RedPillSucks 33
well, one can try to talk out the problem as well, even if she's cheating. Divorce is not always the answer, and not the only way to resolve things.
Djmaxn 13
This is why most marriages end in divorce. People think it's the only answer. Well I say that divorce is a terrible idea that hurts everyone around you, and OP should consider ever other available option FIRST before resorting to divorce. At least try to work it out.
kaylamarriee 10
I agree #77, that's what I was trying to get at with my previous comment. For some people, it is the best option. But it is best to explore all options and talk it out first.
mufasaniqqa 13
they have kid(s) together. they should at least try to work something out for the kids sake.
RayneSmytson 24
One of the worst reasons to stay together is "for the kids"... The kids grow up having a dysfunctional relationship and unhappy parents as an example and they learn that that is what normal relationships look like.
keirookami 11
It's never healthy to stay together "for the kids" as then the problems get worse and worse over time eventually leading to the kid believing it's his/her fault
dannnngthatsux 19
Sorry, if it is cheating AND your kid is being involved, it's time to run. Now, if mom had kept it on the down low...
cheeky_booty 11
I think you need to seriously consider a paternity test!! She's obviously cheating. Hopefully this dont change ur relationship with ur daughter.
Shmatterhorn 38
"Next up on Maury,..."
xvrhdez 5
And an STD test :D
BlackDesire 19
that sounds pretty hard