Today, my house got egged. Why? As a joke, my friend bought me a doormat that says, "A Canadian Lives Here." I'm Canadian. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my house got watermeloned. Not egged, watermeloned. FML
Today, while at work at my grocery store I sold a TON of eggs to a bunch of kids. We joked around that they were "going to bake a giant cake." When I got home I found out someone had egged my house. FML
Today, I didn't think getting egged was a thing anymore until I found that my car got egged. FML
Today, my house got egged and since it is the winter the eggs froze. They used two dozen eggs. FML
Today, I came home from work and found my house egged, and bricks thrown through my windows. I called the police, and submitted a report. Later that night, I heard the doorbell ring. Nobody was at the house, but there was a note saying "Sorry, wrong house". FML
Today, I woke up to find "Fuck you, Harry" painted on my car. Harry's my neighbour. FML
Today, my house was egged while I went out shopping. When I told my dad about it, he immediately and casually admitted to being the one who did it, asking, "You got a fucking problem with that, son?" I don't know if he's just messing with my head, or if he really did do it. FML
Today, I got home from work to find my house covered in graffiti dicks, the windows smashed, the front lawn entirely ripped up, and my letter box containing dog shit. I also found a note taped to the door saying, "Suck on this Darren". Darren is my next door neighbor. FML
Today, I opened my front door to go out for groceries. Lying on my doorstep was a pile of poop. A piece of paper was taped to the ground beside it that read, "Do it again and you'll get more than dog shit." I don't have the slightest clue who I pissed off, or how. FML
Today, my house got broken into. They just made a mess. I saw a note on the kitchen table that read, "There's nothing good here. You have shitty stuff." FML
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Top comments
eminemchick 19
What?! But you guys have nice bacon!
Pinguini26 6
What the hell! Canadians rule!
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Comments (22)
gaga_fierce 0
Racist fools.
gamercanadian 11
Them jealous sob's
Tracy_Evans 2
What's wrong with being Canadian?
Yngve_fml 9
Ugh, those Canadians. Their complete lack of purpose of ecistance annoys my brain to the very center.
margie2194 12
Excuse me we're you dissing Canada? I couldn't hear you over my free healthcare.
pattyrick4321 0
tracy, everything is wrong with being canadian
Yngve_fml 9
You've got that maple cyrup. Nuff said.
eminemchick 19
What?! But you guys have nice bacon!
HunterDanielle 3
You forgot our Maple syrup also.
chuckychan 8
you couldnt hear him over your free health care because your ear infection never wasn't treated right. come to America and they might be able to fix it. OP at least they didnt throw shit. Thats what happened when my friend put a door mat that said i was from Brittan
pattyrick4321 0
you deserve it for being canadian
Peacewind 0
You deserve to be egged for being a stupid ****
dylanmurre 4
Canadians are the shit. I am Canadian and proud of it. (and our health benefits). It's you people that corrupt this planet (and live in mc donalds)
lifesucks1234567_fml 2
3- you actually deserve to be "tomatoed"
Peacewind 0
I'm Canadian as well. Sucks man. I hate getting egged. FYL
HunterDanielle 3
next time, club them in the head with a beseball bat then say "well, if you were Canadian, you wouldn't have to pay for your medical bill!!"
Pinguini26 6
What the hell! Canadians rule!
i_wuz_nver_here 31
I'd just like to point out that this fml proves that Canadians don't have a sense of humor.
SupahAsian 4
And to what point would you consider it not funny? Getting their house burned down?
i_wuz_nver_here 31
Yes egging does no permanent damage, I would just scream at my friend until they cleaned it up for me. And as for the door mat one could take it as an insult even though it is simply stating a fact or they could embrace it as a funny little thing to start conversations and whatnot. I'm not trying to be a biggot I might poke a little fun at other people and I am fully prepared to take some making fun of too
Ahlph 0
Eh?
MrXerxes5 6
that's what you get for lying about your bacon! It's just HAM!!!!
BOOSCAREDU 0
But it's good ham
chanlove 1
I love Canada :)
sephoraprincess 7
well why'd they need to egg you?
Alleged_Cranium 7
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
What are you gonna do aboot it?
Peacewind 0
Amazing! People thing we say aboot...we don't! Lol eh?