Today, I woke up to my husband peeing on the floor. He managed to pee in two open clothes drawers and on the pants I was going to wear to work tomorrow. Before I left earlier he promised he wouldn't get smashed tonight. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband woke up, tried walking to the bathroom, fell down, got back up and started peeing on the carpet. I’ve never seen him this drunk before. FML
Today, my boyfriend walked out of the bathroom, informed me he'd accidentally peed on the floor, and told me I could clean it up when I get a chance. FML
Today, my husband came home late from drinking with his buddies, only to toss and turn and keep me up for an hour. He then sat up and didn't move for a few minutes. I sat up to see what was wrong, only to see him pissing on the carpet beside our bed. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my boyfriend full-on peeing into our tiny trash bin. The trash bin was basket material, so the pee was all over the floor. Once he'd finished, he went to bed, passed out and left me to clean it all up. FML
Today, I woke up to a strange noise. I looked over to see my drunk husband standing at the dresser. I asked him what he was doing. "Peeing." I asked him, "In the sock drawer?" There was a pause. "Am I peeing in the wrong drawer?" FML
Today, I woke up to find myself drenched in piss after a long night of drinking. I immediately sprang into action, tossing my bedding in the washer and hopping into the shower. Running late for work, I threw on a nice dress and got into my car. Guess who also peed in the drivers seat? FML
Today, I woke up at a guy's house drunk and soaked in my own pee. I had passed out with all my clothes on. Since I was late for work and didn't have a change of clothes, all I could do was throw my jeans in the dryer. I had to sit all day at work in crusty pee pants. FML
Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom and proudly showed me how far back he could stand from the toilet while he peed. Unfortunately, he got distracted and peed all over the floor I had mopped just an hour before. FML
Today, my morning started off by stepping in my dog's piss by the door. Then, stepping in my husband's piss by the toilet. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
daidax_238 26
I guess you could say urine a bad situation! ...I regret nothing
OnAMission 5
I'd be pissed if I were in the room when it happened...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (33)
alainopotato 20
Maybe he didn't get smashed and he's just marking his territory
skynyrd714 3
You should check out Alanon.
sgdigaetano 3
Why on earth would you want to live with a loser like this? You like living with an obvious alcoholic? Ditch his sorry ass
ryoung1776 8
At one time, I was this person. Until I stopped drinking this and worse kept happening. See a marriage counselor and if he doesn't do something about his drinking, consider separation. It may save your life and sanity.
shinikageWolf 15
Was he sleepwalking? Drunk? An asshole?
jesuiskylie 4
My biggest question here is why this was marked NSFW...