Today, I went to the hospital with a broken hand. They gave me a cast and some prescription pain medication. The only problem is that the bottle of medication is child-proof, I live alone and I can't open it with one hand. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I tore a muscle in my back. At the hospital, I was prescribed some pain medication. My husband got me settled at home, with everything I needed within reach, and left for work. As I picked up the bottle to take the first pill, I knocked it on the floor. It rolled under the couch. FML
Today, my doctor finally prescribed me some medication for my arthritis. The cap was insanely well-secured, and my hands were too racked with pain to get it off. FML
Today, I struggled to open a childproof bottle, which, by the way, had the instructions printed on the lid. FML.
Today, while observing a surgery, I was asked to open a glass ampule of adrenaline. Not only did I break it and get it everywhere, I sliced open my thumb bad enough to need stitches. FML
Today, while helping a child through a tantrum, I was kicked and my hand broke. The bone is completely in half and fixing it will require plates, screws, and surgery along with months of recovery. Another day on the job. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs and broke my arm. I went into hospital to get it put in a cast, but still went into school afterwards. I got written up for truancy because I didn't have a doctor's note. The cast was still on my arm. FML
Today, my doctor called and asked me when I could have my broken hand x-rayed again. I said the ER staff had told me it was a bad sprain over two weeks ago. I'm now in a full cast, and have to have my partially healed bones re-broken. There goes my summer. FML
Today, I was laying on the couch with a cast on my broken ankle. My brother thought it would be funny to shoot my cast with a high-powered pellet gun. It went straight through the cast and now I need to go back to the hospital. FML
Today, after years of being terrified of those biscuit cans that pop when you unwrap them, I finally decided I'd open one myself. I'm sitting in the hospital with a sliced hand from the lid and can feel therapy in my future. FML
Today, I cut myself with child-proof scissors. FML
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Top comments
klol_fml 11
thats not very handy
minichu 4
I think the best solution is hold the bottle between your thighs while sitting down and then twist the cap. Seems like it might work. Good luck!
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Comments (202)
poppyseed420 9
Put the bottle between your legs and use your good hand to press down and turn with your palm
misomalu 0
Improvise, adapt, overcome
withasmile 3
take it back to your pharmacist and ask for a non child proof bottle
TKello 6
Here's what you do, put the bottle against your thigh and put a decent enough pressure, then twist the orange bottle like it's a motorcycle handle. You might spill a couple pills but I recommend taking them out of the bottle anyway and just lining them up on a counter or dresser.
mrrossh 3
Put it between your knees and use your good hand.
happy_dino 6
Ask a neighbor? Sorry OP!
sodapopper 6
But you sure can post to FML huh! Try holding it between ur knees or if ur too weak for tht sit with ur feet clasped together with shoes on, put the bottle between ur feet and twist. And don't put the lid bck on. Otherwise if these ways dnt work, put it in a plastic bag and smash it with a hammer.
sodapopper 6
Heres another method nobodys mentioned. Sit on the floor cross ur legs like ur gonna sit indian style but put the bottle in the bend(back) of ur knee and squeeze ur leg together. While ur doing tht open it with ur other hand thts free.
samurninja 0
Has no one else realized this is fake... Cause how the **** is he typing...
Meilin 7
I too think there's plenty of ways to get it open with one hand, but this FML made me laugh HARD xD