Today, I went to the doctor's thinking I had a UTI. Turns out I have an STD. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Damn
Today, I went to the free clinic down the street to prove to my girlfriend I don't have any STDs so that we can finally have sex. Turns out I have one. FML
Ouch
Today, I went in for an STD test. The Q-tip broke off in my urethra. FML
Today, I found out I have an STD, courtesy of my girlfriend. Funnily enough, she was clean when we first started dating. FML
Because of him
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I also found out I have an STD. I was clean before we dated. FML
Today, I found out I have a yeast infection, a bladder infection, and a urinary tract infection all at the same time. Oh, and I also have the flu. FML
Surprise!
Today, I went in to the doctor's thinking I had a bladder infection. I walked out knowing I'm pregnant. FML
Bad news likes company
Today, I got a call from my doctor telling my I tested positive for an STI (first time in my fucking life). Mind you, I got the call while my dermatologist was cutting open my butt cheek to drain an abscess. I also got told on top of the new hole in my ass and the STI that I also have a yeast infection. Happy Monday. FML
Today, I have a UTI that spread to my kidneys, a yeast infection, and a herpes outbreak. Oh, and my period came this morning. FML
Today, I found out my ex gave me an STI. Today I also found out I'm allergic to the medication. FML
Today, I'm at the ER for my first ever UTI and potential other "down there" issues. Yesterday I got married. FML
Top comments
DontModMeDammit 10
Unborn tarantula infestation.
Carbonite2010 0
At least you don't have UTI RIGHT?
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Comments (237)
xSorry_fml 10
Can't get stds from a ***** (unless your sharing).
ZombieK1ll4 8
*****
sandybaybe 3
Who's bed have your boots been under?
beckyxD 13
That's referred to cheaters, not ******.
SailorLove 4
YDI for being a *****!
grattow96 0
You deserve it for not wearing a condom or having him wear one depending if a girl or boy wrote this.
The_Weirdo 10
How do know OP didn't use a condom. Yes, they help, but don't work 100% of the time.
marissamay25 3
True about the condoms, but thats why you don't have sex with dirty people or for just a hook up. You end up getting screwed for 18 years or an STD. People just need to be smarter on there choices.
desireev 18
Why do you and people like you keep posting stupid comments like this? I mean, how do you know whether she was wearing a condom?? READ THE DAMN POST BEFORE YOU SAY SOMETHING AS ******* STUPID AS YOU JUST DID! I swear! People like you just piss me off!!
marissamay25 3
Lol.
desireev 18
Also, people need to stop with the ridiculous "don't hook up with dirty people" comments. You CAN'T look at someone and tell if they have an STD! Also, what if the only person she was having sex with was her boyfriend or husband? And HE went out and cheated and brought it home to her??
marissamay25 3
I agree with the bf cheating or husband. That would suck too And the dirty hook up was refuring to a person hooking up with somebody who looks dirty, you can tell when looking at a person if they take care of themselves or not
desireev 18
Yeah but that doesn't mean that they have an STD. Everyone knows you don't hook up with someone who looks like a bum! And, chances are, the bum-looking-guy looks so bad that he isn't getting laid. So he probably doesn't have any STDs. But that doesn't matter. Completely irrelevant. The point is that people need to stop making shit up and making assumptions. All it does is make them look like a ******* idiot!!
marissamay25 3
Oh god a bum that gets sex. That would be creepy if it's ever happend.
catseventhst 0
Shut up your ugly
spbenge 1
Sucks to suck bro
Ckrius 7
Haha I love how comments on FML are rarely comments on the FML's, but just arguments from topics derived from the FML. Either way the comments are funnier than the FML for the most part. Haha I love reading the comments. I'm sort of a noob here but I think Perdix's comments are most excellent.
AndysFancy 6
Prefix has posted over 10,000 comments. I wouldn't be too impressed with someone who has no life, noob.
AndysFancy 6
Perdix*. Damn autocorrect.
marpay 11
Don't mess with perdix he will eat you alive for breakfast.
DocBastard 40
Andy, just because someone comments a lot, it doesn't mean he has no life. I have over 4000 comments (last I checked), a job, a wife, 2 children, and a hobby. You can take your holier-than-thou attitude and your 20 comments and shove them right up your ass, noob.
AndysFancy 6
Docbastard - Perdix seems to have a lot of fans, I know. But I find most of his comments outright crude and therefore, it WOULD be the sophomoric posters who would be entertained by them. I called that kid "noob" because he called himself that...and you're an idiot for calling me ANDY when I am Andy's WIFE, you ******* dunce. Get it? Andy's fancy? All that "medical schooling" didn't teach you much, huh?
AndysFancy 6
DocBastard - 4000 comments from a grown man, getting off on posting your sexual innuendos with a bunch of teenagers, and then going home to your wife and 2 kids? Yeah, let me bow down now, you slob. Holier-than-thou? No. But I find this funny coming from someone whose profile reads as yours does. Last time you checked?? Seriously? It's not that hard to just tap your picture and read all that steam you're trying to blow up people's asses!!
caysters 12
Ohh... Ouch... No bueno! Since I don't know more of the story, not voting ydi or fyl... If you're a ****, ydi. If you're the innocent party, fyl.
racheljessie 17
Ouch, OP! I hope that your STD is curable! At least you probably got it diagnosed it fairly early, before it gets really nasty.
TheDrifter 24
It seems me and some others have fallen behind the times. The prevailing logic on STDs seems to be "Well, I go through so many partners that I'm bound to get one, so why bother with condoms?" I guess skanky is the hipster thing to be these days.
ohmandapants 17
So all hipsters are skanky? Those ******* one more reason not to like them... Choose your wording more carefully.