Today, I went out to a nice restaurant for my friend's birthday. I went to the bathroom and heard the woman in the other stall crying. She couldn't pull her underwear up over her obese, old-lady ass because her arms don't reach that far anymore. I was the only one there. I had no choice. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was in a public bathroom with the runs when I noticed my stall didn't have any toilet paper. I was the only one in the bathroom, and I thought I could make it to the stall next to me and grab some with my pants down. I wasn't actually the only one in there. FML
Today, I was in a public toilet, enduring an extremely awkward silence between myself and the person in the next stall. In my rush to get out of there, I managed to get my ass stuck in the toilet seat, and ended up being pulled out by the maintenance men. FML
Today, I was waiting in line to use the bathroom. I complained to the guy next to me about how long the lady was taking. I kept making jokes about it, but he never seemed to laugh. Finally, the door opened and out came a lady in a wheelchair. The guy next to me was her husband. FML
Today, I took my brother to the bathroom at a restaurant. The stall next to mine was locked, so I assumed he was still in there. I yelled his name a few times, then banged on the door out of annoyance. I gave up and returned to the table, where he was sitting with a grin. Turns out I just traumatized a poor lady in the stall. FML
Today, I really had to take a shit. My coworker had gone on lunch break and I was alone in the shop. There were no customers, so to the can I went. Cue a long series of loud wet farts and splashes, followed by the flush. I emerged to see the horrified face of some old lady and her grandson who'd heard everything. FML
Today, I was shopping in a mall when I needed to go to the bathroom. One of the toilets was out of order, so I went to the other toilet. After that, there was no toilet paper, so when I saw tissue in the sink, I left the stall with my pants down and someone saw me. FML
Today, I went to the bathroom in a mall. As I was in the stall, a woman tried to open it. I yelled out that's it was occupied but she kept shaking it to open it. It came up to the point where she had to crawl under the door to see that I was there. FML
Today, I really had to pee so I took the only stall that was available in the bathroom: the handicapped stall. A girl in a wheelchair came in seconds later and cursed at me for taking her designated spot. FML
Today, while in a public bathroom, I threw out my back. A stranger had to help me pull up my pants. FML
Today, I had no choice but to use a public bathroom. I have issues going when there are others in the stalls, and apparently another person did as well. We both sat there in silence, waiting stubbornly for the other to give up and leave so we could go. It’s been 20 minutes. FML
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Top comments
klbrend 0
Oh god. That sucks. Kudos to you for being such a nice person though.
dudemitch 0
ew. you had a choice. the fact that you actually helped probably just guaranteed you a space in heaven. fyl, but your still the nicest person ever.
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Comments (408)
kcslgvr 11
at first glance you sound pretty nice for doing that... but by you bashing her and calling saying she had an "obese old-lady ass", as well as whining about it makes you one of the ugliest people i have heard of. no one deserves the shit you just gave them. the lady needed help, not another mean name to be called. i hope that one day you can feel what that poor lady was feeling you piece of shit.
MyNameIsAudrey 0
#162....werrd
MyNameIsAudrey 0
werrd #162...
blackdog_fml 0
aw good for you! :) karma
rosiegrewup 0
Any decent human being would have done the same - and not complained or made degrading comments about the poor woman. There's no need to be so cruel about it, you self-absorbed little shit.
mehwhateverr 0
You sound like a jerk to me. Any nice person would do it instead of insulting them by saying things like "obese, old-lady ass". YDI just for that.
nyledf 1
i dont think i would have been able to do that! i probably would have ran out! but, i respect you for doing it.
fieryice 0
aww that was so nice of you. poor old lady
Kyothine 0
#22 SHUT THE **** UP. COUNTER FMLS ARE NOT FUNNY.
Matzaball300 0
1. wow youre a great person 2. i would run away. sorry but i just couldnt do that