Today, my Nana asked me to get her a book from her nightstand, but failed to specify which nightstand was hers. I stumbled across my grandparents' collection of sex toys instead. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I visited my 78 year-old grandmother. She thanked me for visiting and gave me a magazine before I left telling me I might find something I like in there. When I got home I looked at the magazine only to realize it's full of dildos and sextoys. FML
Today, I was looking in my grandparents' drawers and cupboards to find a blanket, but instead found a stash of sex toys, and a male G-string with a horse on the front. The best bit? When you press the horse's nose, it neighs. FML
Today, my mother found my sex toys. To make me "feel better" she showed me hers. FML
Today, I got a new vibrator, raced all the way home, tore my pants off, took it out of the box, and then my grandmother walked in my front door. Apparently she's spending the night so she can make it to a doctor's appointment in the morning. FML
Today, I gave my mom an extra pillow since the ones in the guest room were too flat and hurt her neck. Hours later, I remembered that I'd stashed my vibrator in that pillowcase during a romantic camping trip with my husband. She found it. FML
Today, I found some nude vintage pictures in my house. I decided to beat my meat to them. Later I found out it was my grandma. FML
Today, my husband got some junk mail. My grandma brought the mail in and let my 5-year-old open it because it was just junk. It turns out it was a catalog from an adult toys shop. FML
Today, my grandma's new dildo arrived in the mail. We buried her yesterday. FML
Today, I was tidying my room when my gran came in and offered to help. I said I didn't need any, but she started going through it anyway. She found a tube of "Very Cherry" lube and asked what it was. I subtly tore off the label and tried to convince her it was a face mask. She's taken it to try it out tonight. FML
Today, I was sitting on my 70 year-old grandmother's bed with my older brother. I decided to snoop through the cabinet at the back of her bed, and I pulled out what I naively thought was a strange looking flashlight. When I twisted the bottom of it to see what would happen, it started vibrating. FML
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Top comments
BurnInDemonFire 39
She didn't send you to fetch the Kama Sutra, did she?
Deez_Knots 10
Have fun never looking at your grandparents the same way again. Every time they look you in the eye you’ll be forced to think about how they use those toys
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Comments (10)
fabs1171 23
Here OP, I’m sending you positive vibes
BurnInDemonFire 39
She didn't send you to fetch the Kama Sutra, did she?
Deez_Knots 10
Have fun never looking at your grandparents the same way again. Every time they look you in the eye you’ll be forced to think about how they use those toys
Miss_Kat 7
God forbid your grandparents actually still enjoy their lives! 😱
Glowworm56 27
Looks like those rumors were false. Apparently, elderly people do still give a ****.
WHSKitty4ever 23
Old people need lovin’, too.
Charlie Given 28
LMFAO 🤣🤣 🤣 l know how that feels when I was a kid I found my mom's giant ***** and when I was older I was helping my in-laws look for a missing hamster and came across a large tote packed full of every sex toy you can imagine 😲😨🤢