Today, I went on a date with a great girl; we went out to dinner and saw a movie. After the movie, we went out to my car to find out that a homeless man had broken the window, climbed into it, and was eating the leftover pasta with his fingers. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was on a first date with this girl I've been talking to. I met her and she came with me so I could park my car in the student lot. On the way back, I saw a beat up car with its window duct taped up and exclaimed "Haha! Look at that piece of junk." It was her car. FML
Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML
Next
Today, I took a girl out on a date. We had dinner, we had good conversation, the vibe was excellent, and everything was great. I took her to a bar I frequent after for a couple of drinks to finish the night. She left with some other dude on his motorcycle. FML
Today, I went out with a girl I like. After a movie, we went to McDonald's. There was this couple making out. The girl I was with remarked about how lame it would be to go to McDonald's on a date. I thought we were on a date. FML
Paranoid
Today, I went on a date. After we finished our meal, I had to use the bathroom really bad. When I said so, my date totally lost it and accused me of planning on climbing out a window and ditching her. "Fuck that and fuck you!" she said, then stormed out, leaving me with the bill. FML
Today, I went on a movie date with a guy. He brought his mom. FML
Today, I went on a date. I went to the bathroom for five minutes and returned to find my date had not only left, but poured ketchup all over our food to ruin it. FML
Today, I took a girl out to dinner. Halfway through, she sighed and asked if it was all an episode of Disaster Date. FML
Today, I went on a date. We met in the parking lot of a restaurant. As I approached his car he took one look at me, said "Nope", and drove off. FML
Today, I went on a date to the movies with this guy I kinda like. When he was driving me home, he asked me to be his girlfriend; I said I couldn’t because it was really bad timing. He kicked me out of the car, called me an asshole, and made me walk home. FML
Top comments
llamafish 25
Plot twist: it's actually her father.
skellingtonfart 18
Sharing is caring.
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Comments (123)
ifuckmonsters 5
Gotta do what you gotta do.
gc327072 31
Like ******* monsters?
traveler_ghost 12
Be thankful he didn't hotwire it and drive away with your car, and I hope he didn't get any sauce on the car seat!
Mister_Triangle 21
No, be thankful he didn't start a "soup kitchen" in there his homeless friends.
perdix 31
He did, but it ain't tomato sauce, if you know what I mean !
gc327072 31
39- Talk about special sauce. I bet his name was Mike, too.
traveler_ghost 12
at least you still have the wonderful date to look back onto
arcslogger 2
Beat him senseless
Caitlyn36 8
what? you didn't foresee this and leave the poor man a fork? jeez, some people these days..... *sarcasm* anyways that does suck OP but if you think of it another way, you gave a homeless man a meal that he probably wouldn't have had otherwise :)
TechFire 25
He didn't give a meal. He had his meal stolen. Big difference. Being homeless isn't an excuse for breaking the law. If he wants a bright side to this, he should be happy for giving the homeless man a warm, temporary home... in a jail cell.
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
You sir are a very sad and uncompassionate person. I just hope that one day you will be in such dire straits that you will not know where you’re going to sleep or when your next meal will be. Let’s hope then that you will meet then with someone who will have the same generous heart as you do.
TechFire 25
I am compassionate. I give change to the homeless whenever I can. However, I don't believe that being homeless is an excuse for damaging property and stealing. If that's the way you feel, I hope someone reading this comment finds out where you live, dresses like a homeless person, and robs you blind. There's a line, and this guy crossed it. He's a criminal, simple as that. Unless you're fighting against an unfair law or trying to push some important change to society, there's no excuse for breaking the law. Even then, there's never, ever an excuse for damaging property. He belongs in prison. At the very least, in prison, he'll have a warm place to stay and he'll be fed.
echosaints 5
YDI! If saw that there was pasta in a car I'd break into it too.
Hannahbanana95 8
Atleast the date went well(:
toalysium 15
Hope you called the cops, OP. Don't feel bad for someone ruining your night because they made bad life choices. He could have gone to a shelter and not been a thieving, property damaging douche.
TechFire 25
This is the comment that got thumbs down? -.- This generation I swear...
Awsumuzzie 12
I will probably get thumbed down, too. But seriously, this is the only comment I actually agree with. I can't wrap my head around making an excuse for someone to ruin property.
LeCielNousAide 7
As someone going into the field of substance abuse, I feel the need to speak up. Honestly, was the leftover pasta really that important to you? You don't know what this homeless man's life is like -- it is obviously difficult for him to get food, and for those who say giving a homeless person money is bad because they'll spend it on drugs/alcohol, that is true. But it is because if they don't get the drug, they'll experience terrible withdrawal symptoms that can make them physically sick or kill them. I'm not condoning breaking the law either, but people like this do things they normally wouldn't if they were not mentally ill. OP, sucks that your pasta got stolen, but I think you can have a little more sympathy for a mentally ill homeless man. You didn't need that pasta to survive if you had the money to go out to dinner and a movie.
Awsumuzzie 12
65, my husband and I are having money issues. But to keep life from being anymore stressful, we both save and pitch in for at least one date night during a month. I cannot afford someone breaking my car. You can't use the reason of him going out as him being well off. Now I'm not saying that the hobo should control himself IF he was actually crazy, but I volunteered at a homeless shelter and I would love to see more people actually use shelters. If we let this guy off the hook, let's just expect more break-ins. And it might escalate to breaking into homes, but be thankful that you can afford a home, can't get mad someone is trying to live off of you!
ManInTheMachine 20
65: I fail to see how you got that the homeless man was mentally ill out of this. If he was coherent enough to break into a car to get to pasta, then I doubt he has any form of disabilities. Besides. it's the widow more than it is the pasta. If you went out to your car to find that someone had broken your $500 window to get $15 worth of food, I doubt you would be as sympathetic.
bankrupt 15
If you are stupid enough to become an addict, that is YOUR problem. It is not the OP's job to feed a homeless person and addictions are not an excuse to break the law. That's the problem with you junkies; you bitch and whine that it's not your fault, it's your addiction. **** you. You made yourself an addict, therefore your condition is your fault. I didn't shove that needle into your vein; YOU DID IT TO YOURSELF. Why should I pay for it? Why do you expect me to? The perils of drug addiction have been well-documented for **** knows how many years and yet idiots continue to experiment and get hooked despite a million warnings that this will happen. What the ****? Do you think you're special and won't become addicted like everyone else? Take some ******* responsibility for youself and admit that your addiction is a direct result of your own actions and your own stupidity and stop whining that society owes you. Drug addiction is the one thing that I have ZERO sympathy for because it is completely avoidable and completely self-inflicted. Someone offers you drugs. You say NO! You have a prescription. You follow the directions on the bottle. There. That wasn't hard, was it? But NOOOO, despite the world pounding it into your brain that DRUGS ARE BAD you still try them, get hooked and cry about it. Assholes.
RedPillSucks 33
How did we get that this person was a drug addict? Too many assumptions. While I agree that what the person did was wrong, not all homeless are drug addicts. There are also a lot (too fricking many) homeless veterans out there. Show a little compassion (though not for this guys act).
UltimateGIRness 16
70- what about those that get addicted to pain meds? You can follow the directions and still get addicted to some prescription drugs. Sleep meds for insomniacs can become addicting. My aunt was addicted to sleep meds for a year because she couldn't sleep without them,she followed the directions. Some meds are addicting even if you use them right
EandL_fml 2
just a bit angry aren't we?
LeCielNousAide 7
70 -- we went over this in my class. People try drugs to numb emotional pain/trauma, then get addicted. They know the dangers. They are just hurting in a non-physical way that's difficult to treat. And yes, I am making assumptions about the homeless man beig mentally ill and/or a drug addict of some kind because the vast majority are. Also, I would be upset about the window but I wouldn't be seeing red over it if someone was desperate enough to risk injury for food. But maybe my empathy for people like that is coming through because that's the field I want to go into.
bankrupt 15
Don't give a **** WHY someone is an addict. Don't give a **** that they have problems. Everyone has problems. I was abused like crazy as a kid and it never even occurred to me that the solution was to do drugs to 'numb the pain.' Even as a child I knew the solution was to survive, get a good education and get out and be responsible for myself. Duh. We waste millions of dollars trying to straighten out dumb asses who took drugs instead of actually trying to solve their problems. That money could be spent on something worthwhile, say, cancer research. This doesn't even include the fact that so much crime is drug-related. If dumb ***** didn't use this crap, they wouldn't need to steal to pay for it, the market would dry up and the drug lords would be out of business. Just think of how much better a world this would be if everyone who was offered a drug just said "NO." Crime would be way down. All kinds of money would be available for worthier ventures than getting morons off of heroin that they knew was illegal and addictive when they stuck the needle in their arms for the first time. The bleeding heart dipshits who feel sorry for these assholes would have the opportunity to help people who actually deserve it, like the disabled, instead of wasting their time and pity on junkies.
shark_girl 9
I hope you let him have the leftovers. He needs it more--at least you have your great girl (:
perdix 31
The joke is on him. The "Parmesean cheese" was actually her dandruff!
BulldogHoops 14
*gags*